The Journey to Chastity

Discussion in 'Journals and blogs' started by Kelli, Nov 21, 2012.

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  1. Kelli
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    Kelli Lockem Up!

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    As I find this area of the forum, the Vault the most informative area of the website, I hope to make it my new online hangout when time permits over the next several months.

    First off who and what am I?

    My name is Kelli, I’m in my 40’s, majored in economics and finance in college and today I am an investment adviser for a Fortune 500 company.

    I have two kids away in college, I enjoy horseback riding, eating at fine restaurants and drinking fine wines and occasionally enjoys a little 420.

    I’m thought of as a tell it like it is person at home and at work.

    Perhaps it’s because of my N.J. upbringing or because of my job managing large accounts.

    My husband Bill is a paramedic at the supervisory level, so outside of our relationship I would also classify him as having a very extreme type a personality.

    Back in 2007 Bill confided with me that he felt he was a sex addict because of his addition to Internet porn and excessive masturbation.

    He related that he was spending upwards of $500 a month and that it was now affecting his job, his personal life and our relationship.

    My first reaction was to find a treatment center which focused on sexual addition several of which are located here in the southwest.

    He relied no, that he wanted to try something else called male chastity first.

    I was dumbfounded!

    Here was the man I loved who fathered two of my children who I adored and looked up to that wanted me to lock up his dick.

    WTF has this man become I thought to myself!

    I promised him I would consider this option but first I wanted his commitment that he would destroy all the porn he owned and to never look at any pornography ever again or I would leave him.

    He gave me his word asking if I would like to watch him delete it from our computers.

    Our computers?

    Yes, he related that he had stored all his pornography on a network drive was used to back up all our files on the computers in our home.

    Instead he admitted that formatted in some way to become his secret library which could be accessed by any computer in the world with a password.

    Yes I said but first I want to see some of this crap he had collected.

    Reluctantly he obliged and from my computer he navigated to the network drive, typed in a password and there before my eyes were gigabytes of movies and photos all categorized in folders.

    One folder was named bondage so I told him to open it up.

    To my dismay there was video after video of men beating women.

    Then another folder called bi-stuff.

    You guessed it guys doing guys, disgusting I thought.

    I demanded him delete it all immediately!

    He grabbed the main folder, dragged it to the trashcan, and for the next several hours the system was deleting file after file.

    I told him that I wanted to be left alone to think.

    He went to his office and closed the door.

    I picked up the phone and called my younger sister shaking and in tears.

    She immediately asked me what was wrong and if I was all right.

    I told her what just happened and Bill’s request for me to lock him up in some dick cage.

    She told me that her husband was out of town so she would drive right over pick me up and suggested that I spend the night.

    After hanging up the phone I felt betrayed just wanting to get away to anywhere where Bill wasn’t.

    I picked up my cell phone and texted Bill a message telling him I was spending the night with my sister and not to call.

    I walked outside and waited for my baby sister to save me.

    The 15-minute ride to her house seemed like an eternity as I sat there in a daze trying to sort out what just happened.

    Once inside my sisters home she poured me a glass of wine and a fresh medicated brownie.

    An hour later I was sound asleep on her couch.

    The next morning at breakfast my sister and I began talking.

    As both of us were brought up in an Irish Catholic family we thought of male chastity as something a priest did or was suppose to do.

    So we went to Google and began searching for more information.

    What we found in the beginning were sites about FEMDOM and forced sissy stuff, not something I wanted any part of.

    Then we began finding sites that discussed female lead relationships or FLR, this was something I was more comfortable with.

    We learned that many men who had high stress jobs were vulnerable to becoming addicted to Internet porn and excessive masturbation.

    We learned that a committed FLR could help curb these addictions.

    There was an email address, I reached out for help.

    A few hours later I received an email in return from a lady who understood my concerns and told me she could help.

    She also related that she had a close friend in her network that lived close by, that we could meet for coffee.

    I took her up on her offer.
     
  2. penitentMale
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    penitentMale Oh so curious to learn more

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    Wow. Well that answers some of the questions I posed to you when you responded to my introduction.
     
  3. Kelli
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    Kelli Lockem Up!

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    I’m very scared of meeting people I don’t know, so the following afternoon I had my sister escort me to my meeting with Sally at a Starbucks in Tempe.

    Sally was in her 30’s and also married with 2 kids.

    She related that she and her husband had become involved with male chastity for pretty much the same reasons Bill wanted to.

    The only difference was is that she discovered all the porn on her husband’s computer along with emails going back and forth with gay men.

    In his attempt to save their marriage he agreed to join a sex addiction 12-step program.

    It was here from other members of his group that he first learned about male chastity devices.

    He related to her that even though the program frowned upon their use, there were members of his group that swore by them.

    He also related to her that the main reason he became involved with porn was because he felt that she didn’t show him the intimacy and the attention he needed and felt abandoned by her.

    He confided with his wife that he too was interested in learning more about male chastity and for her taking control.

    By her sharing her story with us we learned that many men seeking this lifestyle were seeking ways to get control over their lives because of their high stress work environments.

    We also learned that as long as these men were properly managed they wouldn’t revert back to deviant sexual behavior.

    I was then that I became committed to this lifestyle as a way save my marriage and make this all work for the 2 of us.
     
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  4. Dumb1
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    Dumb1 senior member

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    Your husband is a very fortunate man Kelli and it is a very good decision you have mad to at least look into the possibility of trying to make this work to save the marriage so many women would have run a mile or refused to even look at the possibility. Some of us men really need to be in an FLR to balance our lives and indeed as you point out it can work out extremely well for everyone in the family including any children involved if done sensibly and discreetly. I look forward to hearing more from you.
     
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  5. Kelli
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    Kelli Lockem Up!

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    A very fine thank you Stroppy. I've read many of your prior posts before joining and I admire a lot of what you have had to say.
     
  6. Missy Tanya
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    Missy Tanya Senior Member

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    Great introduction. I love that your willing to learn and maybe adapt to a problem that you two are having. I think, once you've both learned how to make chastity and FLR work for you, you both will become more in love than ever before. It will change both of your lives, in a good way. Once he fingers out that he depends on you, you've got him. You will be thinking to yourself, why didn't I think about this sooner.
    I would recommend visiting Mistress Lori's web page. Then read some of the reviews of other women that have found the benefits that chastity has to offer. Then you can decide what works best for your relationship and start converting him into the husband that you always thought he could have been.

    Congrats on your enlightenment into the world of chastity an all it can offer. Sincerely Missy Tanya
     
  7. Kelli
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    Kelli Lockem Up!

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    Following my meeting with Sally and my sister I headed home.

    As I turned the corner toward our driveway I noticed boxes piled alongside the driveway and Bill dressed in his workout attire.

    My first thought, is he moving out?

    As I pulled into the drive Bill approached the car as I rolled down the window

    “Hey hon, just cleaning out the garage so you can park once again in it” Bill remarked.

    Holly shit I thought, I’ve asked him for years to do this, why now?

    I pulled into the garage, opened the door and Bill gave me a huge hug.

    “Babe, I know you think I’m a little weird and I’m sorry if I offended you” Bill said.

    I replied “No, I’m just trying to figure this all out in my head. When you’re done come inside and we will go shopping for one of those dick cages”.

    Bill smiled

    About an hour while I was preparing dinner Bill came inside took a shower.

    Feeling and looking refreshed (an hot) he came out, grabbed his laptop and sat at the kitchen counter, I sat beside him.

    He clicked on an icon on his desktop immediately taking us to Amazon to a page that was selling a plastic chastity device for 40 some dollars.

    Bill related that this was the one he was thinking about as it was adjustable and it had some good reviews. He also explained this this was over a $100 cheaper on Amazon then on the manufactures website.

    I then asked “ok, what do we do with the key incase something comes up at work” (he is a paramedic)

    He related that he had thought about this too and he suggested leaving a spare in a sealed envelope that I would initial. If he broke the seal without a valid explanation I could void the agreement

    I then asked how long am I locking you up for

    He stated “Look I know that you only like to have sex once a week on Sunday mornings, so lets try for that first. On Sunday’s you unlock me”

    I told him to press the button and order it

    Three days later the package arrived…..
     
  8. Dumb1
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    Dumb1 senior member

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    This sounds so familiar Kelli how many of us started out in a similar way as this, looking forward to more.
    stroppy.
    And i always abided by your rule.......You will never get what you never ask for!
     
  9. Kelli
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    Kelli Lockem Up!

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    I work from home a couple days a week, so a few days later Bill’s package from Amazon arrived while I was home.

    I called him at work and he related that he would try to get home early.

    A few hours later he arrived, I gave him his package and he went into the bedroom.

    30 minutes later he came out naked except for his new CB device handing me two keys

    I admit I was REALLY turned on looking at him knowing that I now had the power

    However I voiced some concern as I noticed a little bruise

    He related that the device had pinched some skin when he put it on

    I asked if it was comfortable and he related that it was tight, but felt he could getting used to it

    I said good, cause I really like the way it looks on you and I’d like you to remain undressed for the reminder of the day

    I noticed a slight smirk as he asked if there was anything he could do for me

    I said of course, warm up some leftovers and make us some dinner

    He turned and walked into the kitchen as I stood there watching his little ass wiggle, wow, was I hot!

    30 minutes later he announced dinner was served and I walked into the dining area where he had set out our good china and a few candles.

    He pulled out my chair, poured me a glass of wine and I positioned myself at the head of the table.

    One thing I have to say about firemen and paramedics, they can take leftovers and turn them into a gourmet dinning experience, this meal was exceptional.

    After dinner he began picking up and then escorted me to the TV room carrying another chilled bottle of wine.

    I sat into the recliner, grabbed the remote for the massager as he poured a new glass of wine commenting “Anything else my queen?”

    Yes, I felt like a queen but I didn’t want to be bothered by my servants so I replied no, it’s not Sunday yet so you can sit over there (pointing to the couch) and be quite while I watch my TV shows.

    This is something I’m going to enjoy, No more boring football games while he is wearing this device
     
  10. Kelli
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    Kelli Lockem Up!

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    Bill’s first few nights in Chastity was his most difficult especially in the mornings when he woke up with a painful erections and he had to make several adjustments in the sizing of his device.

    On the third day I noticed a definite shift in his behavior as he was becoming just a bit irritable or what I call his PMS stage.

    Then disaster on the 5th day!

    Bill was mowing the lawn and as he bent down he heard and felt a sharp cracking noise in his private area followed by a sharp pain.

    Bill’s paramedic training kicked right in

    Stay calm, breath, and relax

    Bill’s plastic chastity device had split and a tiny wedge of plastic was wedged into his penis.

    He related that he had to literally crawl to his truck to get that spare key that I had sealed in the envelope for emergencies.

    Later that afternoon Bill called who he thought was the manufacture only to find out from them that he had purchased a cheap Chinese counterfeit device.

    I admit, I would had called it quits at this point so I complement Bill’s commitment as he ordered the real deal right then.

    The following week the new device was delivered and he locked himself back into chastity leaving the 2 new keys on my desk.
     
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  11. LockedInWI
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    LockedInWI Member

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    So glad you're sharing your story Kelli. I've loved reading it so far and hope you'll continue to share the evolution of your chastity relationship.

    My journey started in a way the opposite of what you and some other comenters have described. My Miss and I met because of our shared desire for a FLR. She was the first one to bring up trying a chastity device and I was more than a bit hesitant because it was a big step towards *real* FLR relationship.

    That was almost a year ago and I'm so glad I gave in and took the dive. It has brought us so much closer, made her more confident and me more submissive (which makes both of us much happier).

    So we started our chastity adventure because of the kink and we found out the real relationship benefits.

    But I love hearing about couples like you who start because of real relationship needs, and along the way find out soooo many kinky, fun benefits to your sex life :D
     
  12. Kelli
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    Kelli Lockem Up!

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    I hope to get the courage up to share some of our (my) fun benefits :)

    It's been crazy here with the kids her for Thanksgiving. They leave on Monday and Tuesday Bill and I are heading out of town for his birthday for a few days.
     
  13. Kelli
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    Kelli Lockem Up!

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    The first few months Bill did have a few accidents with his new CB slipping off as he had a very hard time in getting it adjusted so it was both comfortable and secure enough for him to wear at work.

    Bill had this problem because his left testical is about half the size of his right.

    One weekend Bill went to the local Apple store located in a near by mall to buy himself a new iPhone.

    While walking in the food court area the device unexpectedly slide off and fell down his pants leg to the tile floor and making a few bounces.

    When it finally landed, he kicked it aside under a table, picked it up and made his escape through the side door red faced,

    When Bill came home he called Mature Metal and asked them if they could come up with a custom ring size.

    They explained that he would first need to get fitted with one of their plastic rings so he ordered a set of them.

    After deciding on his ring size he called them back and placed his order for the Queens Keep (such an appropriate name)

    It took a few adjustments going back and forth to get the gap size just right but when it was finally done Bill related that the Mature Metal felt much more comfortable and it looked a hell of a lot better to me.

    Another benefit it was much easier for him to keep clean and he didn’t have to bug me every couple days for the key to readjust.
     
  14. Dumb1
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    Dumb1 senior member

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    That moment when you feel something slipping off and that popping feeling is a real heart stopping moment and until you experience it you can never fully understand what a fright it can be at the thought of who will discover what is lurking under
    your shorts day to day (mine came off and fell onto the tennis court mid game!). So glad you have found something to help alleviate this problem as i did.:eek:
     
  15. Kelli
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    Kelli Lockem Up!

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    Mortified? No

    i understood how embarrassing this was for him and later we both laughed our ass off

    Bill's biggest fear has always been being discovered at work, so he always wears a jockstrap when working, even when he showers after a call.

    Away from work he also wears tight underwear, frequently wearing women's panties as he loves the way they feel

    There is no need for that little fly opening in his underwear as he has been squatting to pee since he began wearing a device 5 years ago.

    Personally, this is one of MY biggest benefits!

    No pee spots around the toilet and the seat is always down.
     
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  16. Mistress B
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    Mistress B Mistress B

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    Having a clean toilet seat is a huge bonus with chastity. Why males prefer to stand is something I have difficulty in understanding.
     
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  17. sissymaid_emily
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    sissymaid_emily sissy maid emily or just sissy, or maid

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    Curtsy Mistress B
    Hello Mistress, would it be cheeky to say 'because we could' Mistress ?
    emily
     
  18. Mistress B
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    Mistress B Mistress B

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    sissymaid_emily
    Fine at a public urinal, emily, but at home, the toilet is usually a wc with a seat. ergo. built to sit on.
     
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  19. sissymaid_emily
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    sissymaid_emily sissy maid emily or just sissy, or maid

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    Curtsy Mistress B
    Strongly resist the urge to say 'but thats what girlies do'
    Oh i could never go at the public urinals Mistress. So always used to use the cubicles. & Now it feels so much more natural to sit down in there too. Apart from having to give the seat a thorough cleaning before sitting down.
    Curtsy Mistress
    emily
     
  20. Kelli
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    Kelli Lockem Up!

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    Sorry I've been away, got last minute call to travel out of town to met with a client in Vegas. Had a wonderful time :p
     
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  21. Kelli
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    Kelli Lockem Up!

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    Within weeks (if not days) my sister and I noticed a big change in Bill's behavior.

    He became more loving and caring about MY needs and wants.

    After 6 months of being treated like a queen my sister confided with me that she wanted her husband to be in chastity also and asked me for some ideas on how she could discuss convince her husband to wearing a chastity device.

    I thought about it for a few minutes and told her that I had a plan, but wouldn't tell her about it till dinner on Monday night.

    Our typical fall Monday night ritual is to have my sister and her husband over for dinner, the guys drink beer and watch football while sis and I have some wine and girl talk.

    Bill's biggest fear and biggest desire was about being found out about his male chastity.

    He wanted to yell out to the world that he was locked up and that I controlled him, but was petrified of what others would say or even worse to be laughed at.

    So my plan was to expose his little secret after Monday night's dinner and to have HIM explain the benefits of his chastity to both my sister and brother-in-law.

    So after dinner, just before the start of the game I pulled out a bottle of Jack Daniels and poured each of the guys a large glass to loosen them up a little while Sis and I began cleaning the kitchen.

    As Bill's finished his second shot he walked into the living room while I whispered to Sis it was time to play along with my secret plan.

    I then walked over to the end table, grabbed the remote, turned off the TV and turned to my husband and my brother-in-law and said “Ok guys we ladies want to discuss something with you. But first I want both of you to stand up and stand in the center of the room in front of us.

    I then said to Bill "Strip down naked and don't talk and told my sister to tell her husband to get undressed also while handing her a black zipped bag.

    Both our husbands stood their mortified, just staring at us while Sis began gasping for air.

    I then yelled at Bill "Do it now or it's 6 months"

    As Bill took off his shoes and socks Sis yelled at her husband "You too, get undressed now so I can give you this (pointing to the bag) my special gift.

    After Bill was completely disrobed, by brother-in-law turned glanced at Bill and noticed his Queen's Keep.

    I then told Bill to explain to all of us why male chastity was so important to our relationship.

    Bill began his story by looking down at the floor sharing his inability to control his urges to masturbate and of all the money and time he wasted on Internet Porn. He then began looking up explaining that his metal cage brought him back to becoming a better husband, a man and a lover.

    Sis then handed her husband the zippered bad and I held up a key handing it to Sis and said "This is Bill's and my gift to the both of you, a plastic male chastity device to try out. Bill will explain how it works, how to put it on, how to clean it. After you get it on come both of you come back into the kitchen and be ready for inspection".

    A few hushed exchanges were shared between the guys like "WTF is this all about?" - "I'm not wearing this, no way" - "Ok I'll play along for a few days"

    20 minutes later the guys walked into the kitchen for their inspection.

    I'm glad to report that my plan worked and my brother-in-law has joined us in our journey by becoming an active partner in our male chastity lifestyle.
     
  22. mslv4u
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    mslv4u Foot fetish opened my world

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    wonderful to read your story and how the events unfolded. thank you for sharing.
     
  23. Joroincharge
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    Joroincharge Lock em up - 24/7/365!!

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    Nice one!! Is he now in a steel one as well?
     
  24. Kelli
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    Kelli Lockem Up!

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    Yes, he is also wearing a Queen's Keep from Mature Metal
     
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  25. Joroincharge
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    Joroincharge Lock em up - 24/7/365!!

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    LOL:) All sorts of scope here.....

    But if you use the security screws did you know that the 'keys' are interchangeable? So in that case your key could open sis's hubby and vice versa. Would you want this? Of course with padlocks this won't be an issue.
     
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