We had the first actual talk about it!

the hardest part is over. now do yourself a favor and dont rush her.
approach it with a casual, read this if you are interested in learning more... implement whatever aspects of this that interest you, or scrap it all if its of no interest. the most you can ask of her is to approach it with a open mind. i was in a similar situation a year or so ago with my wife.

my advice is dont push for too much too fast. take it SLOW. its hard to not lay it all out once you have a check in the win box for chastity. let her get comfortable with it and the rest will eventually all fall into place. well, all of it that she is interested in pursuing. consider yourself infinitely lucky even if she only embraces chastity. many men on here would kill to have their wife or GF hold their key

 

i never really had a chastity fetish. truth be told i dont even know what got me to come clean with my wife about wanting her to lock me up as the porn i enjoy and fetishes i had back then were femdom, leather, latex, boots, bondage, etc. never the chastity niche. however im glad i did, and im sure you will be as well, for being honest with your wife.

my wife was honored that i wanted to give up my sex life that did not 100% revolve around her. ie porn and masturbation. she also was incredibly relieved of the stress associated with sex in that she would feel obligated or pressured to please me and have me orgasm. now she can focus on whats important, her pleasure and her interests, which excite me more than the thought of my own orgasm even. sex for us is mostly me performing oral on her, erotic massages, foot rubs on the sofa, affectionate kissing like we did when first dating, and thoughtful gifts and exchanges throughout the work day... basically we have rebooted our dating life but with a healthy dose of kink injected into it, and growing more every month. I have a feeling she is gaining the courage and interest to try pegging as last week she was grinding against my ass pleasuring herself during a pause of a caning i was receiving. i was in heaven at that point.

enjoy the ride and be sure you are honest with her, not topping from the bottom, and make sure you focus on her interests and pleasure first. be sure that your submission to her also translates to daily life be it laundry, cleaning, and anything else to make her life easier

 

The first book is a guide and explains the benefits of an FLR including chastity,lots of good ideas for a new Mistress to follow as she chooses, the second link is both fact and fiction and is very erotic on living an FLR lifestyle based on reality, in one of the books Mistress Benay explains how she converted her vanilla date to an FLR lifestyle.

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Dominant-W...=1499194464&sr=1-26&keywords=Mistress+Jessica

https://www.amazon.co.uk/s?k=Mistress+Benay&i=stripbooks&ref=nb_sb_noss

 

I am about 18 months ahead of you. I don't have advice, but my story may offer a look at the road ahead, what you might have coming.

 

do you have a journal or a synopsis of how your story went?

 

I've been kinky forever and I have no idea why. I don't let it disturb me. As far as I know, very few people can identify why they are kinky.

My advice is to just admit that you don't know. It's as if you like aspargus but hate brussel sprouts.

 

Good news on having that conversation! And from reading your other posts to, I feel you are doing every thing the right way, your not being pushy, and leaving it all up to her.
Just give it time and I’m sure you will get there!

 

Easiest to just go to my profile and look for the post 'Saga of the Fatkid'

 

Maybe let her catch you pleasuring yourself she might tell you to,lock it

 

Agreed, sell it to yourself that it is for her first. Then you need to prove it to her what it is about.

 

Next time she brings the subject up, perhaps ask if she would like to take small steps.

Suggestions....

Give her the key and the cage. This is about her being in control not you. She would control you and your ability to self lock.

Let her put it on you. She can take it right back off. Again she is the one in control. The physical reaction of my boy the first time I was the one that locked him.... I got ‘it’

If she is a reader, consider a daily journal. You can put things down in writing as you think about them. Let her in YOUR thoughts on chastity. What you have written here is a good start. FYI... daily journal for you does NOT mean a daily reading requirement for her.

 

Congratulations! This sounds a lot like my experience. I was literally shaking as we were talking about it because I really couldn't believe (i) I was talking about it and (ii) she was willing to try it. My advice would be to start slow and try not to rush anything.

 

In general, it's better to let her ponder the idea for a while. This is even more important since you agreed to provide her with info after she asks, and not before.

Eventually, you won't be able to leave it alone. I suggest putting this off for as long as you can, and when it happens, just ask her if she needs more information.... Just a way to let her know that you haven't grown out of this, and it's not a phase. But why are you looking for a book for her if you already agreed to let her make the next move?

That said, I was in a similar place about a year ago, and she read the following in a single sitting at work....

http://brassiered.com/tamingthecagedbeast/introduction.html

I think it's a very beginner friendly way to introduce the idea to a potential key holder.

 

I would buy a miss ivy book on keyholding. The net has a LOT of off the wall stuff that could send her running for the hills.
Bring it up exactly once more and not anyone after that less she does first. Let her k ow that you have a book she can read if interested and you will leave it in her nightstand

If it's of interest to her, great, put Into use whatever strikes her fancy, if not, no worries.

 

Maybe get a online version and have it translate?
Thats a though one of it can't be translated

 

dont get excited and start pushing...needs to be her idea, and at her pace. I have made that mistake numerous times.

 

Excellent book. I have read it several times. My bride is stuck, after ch. 1, but she is committed to reading it - just on her timeline, and not mine. Locked, frustrated and hopeful!

 

Wow, such a fascinating post! I am in no way an expert, but I have been extremely sexual since about the age of six. I had urges to wear women’s underwear then and had no idea why they made my cock hard! In the summer of 76 I have a very clear memory of my babysitter sunbathing in a bikini, and I stood there staring at her breasts (I was six) and desperately wanting to fondle them. I have a vast array of things that excite me, almost anything and everything (excepting children and animals etc) and have no idea where any of it came from.

You say your partner is very vanilla, but perhaps she has never been given the chance to explore her own sexuality by her past partners? My Mistress was in that situation until she met me, and I gave her Elise Sutton’s wonderful book ‘to read if she was interested’. Wow! It blew her mind! She told me it all totally made sense, and after a long conversation where I basically vomited up all my deepest and darkest desires, she told me that not only did it make sense to her it all really turned her on! So maybe she doesn’t even know what she is in to, and may find she actually will really enjoy having you in chastity!

Take it slow, be patient, and it could be the start of something amazing!

 

My wife also read Male Chastity by Lucy Fairbourn. It was a start. Now, she's a pro at keyholding!!