Taking the plunge!

Hey, all! It’s been a while since I’ve poked my head into this place, sadly. My boy and I have spent more time figuring out what works for us and what doesn’t, with regards not just to chastity, but to all else that must go into an FLR.

We’ve learned some things about each other. When he’s dom, he enjoys planning ahead. When I’m domme, I enjoy taking things as they come. When he’s dominant and I’m submissive, he’s unbelievably cruel to me, and I whimper along for the ride. It works beautifully. The other way around, however, is a bit more of a challenge. He fantasizes about how strict I will be with him over the long haul. I am content to periodically have him serve me, to revel in short-term pleasures, often without remembering to enforce my control over him by locking him up in the interim. And with that, even though I’m content in the short term with what I’m asking of him, I look at him--and at myself--and realize that this is not what I truly want. I want to turn my boy into putty in my hands, want to string him along and make him feel a whole spectrum of pleasure and pain. I can’t do that unless I command his respect, and I won’t command his respect unless I am a true keyholder who keeps her schedule.

Sure, you’ll tell me that it’s my right to dominate exactly how I want to dominate, and I know that it is. Sure, I love having him please me whenever my whim dictates. But that’s the point. That’s not ALL I want. I want to own his heart. I enjoy receiving pleasure from him, but I do not enjoy not seeing reverence and awe and fear in his eyes while he gives it. More than anything else, I want to thrill him. I want to scare him and seduce him in turn. And to do that, I’m going to have to step up my game.

Thus we set our plan into motion: a three-month “trial period” for a permanent FLR. He will be denied during this entire period, with periodic and clearly scheduled chastity device training, to get him acclimated to wearing one 24/7, and more importantly, to get me stricter about enforcing it. (We’ve been disappointed with our Holy Trainer in the past, so we just put in an order for a custom-fit Jailbird last week!) We will make compromises to ensure the success of this period. I will do my best to be on top of the schedule I have drafted and punish him appropriately for all transgressions. In return, he will assist me in maintaining his denial, such as reminding me if I’ve forgotten to lock him up, or suggesting that I restrain him or punish him when he gets pushy.

Should I feel confident in my domination skills at the end of the three months, we will transition into a proper FLR. This includes keeping him denied indefinitely, getting him a PA piercing for an even more secure device, strategically limiting his access to my body so that every glimpse and touch is a treasure, and otherwise showing him no mercy. Saving him as my prize stud, so to speak, only to be released once a year or so, is an intense fantasy that we both share.

But fantasies don’t always mesh with reality, so in the event that I do not feel confident in my domination skills by the end of the period, we will instead allow ourselves to be organic switches once more. Although we lose the thrill of permanence, we trade it for stability and guaranteed comfort. If we choose this path, we’ll celebrate the final day of the trial period, my birthday, by finally losing our PiV virginity together.

I, for one, am holding out to grow into my role, prove myself as a ruthless mistress, and take my boy as my true, permanent love slave when all this is said and done. Despite being switches, we both gravitate towards femdom much more often than not, and we’d love to take it to the next level. Fortunately, we win either way. Maintaining the freedom to switch things up will allow us to keep things fresh and prevent frustration. Besides, I can’t deny that we’re both itching to do away with our somewhat prudish past and just do it already. XD

Either way it turns out, I look forward to the next three months. Wish us luck! <3

 

Thank you to all for the encouraging words! I'll be sure to keep y'all posted of our developments. We're in for quite a ride.