Hi everyone! Im brand new to this site, and brand new to chastity. My wife is kind of onboard, but has no idea the power she could have.... anyway, I put on a cb6k for the first time a week ago. Day two she let me use a strapon on her while encased, and the next night she returned the favor. Day four I got out and got to satisfy her for about an hour without cumming, then back to lockup. The next day she told me she felt bad that I didnt cum, and took the device off. She masterbated me, and I came. Now I cant shake the feeling that I failed, I dont have the urges to please her like I did on day three. I dont want to be allowed to cum like that, at least not so soon, but my wife doesn't understand. what can I do? Instead of feeling good, my orgasm has left me feeling empty and like a failure...
Did you already talk about it with your wife? Tell her clearly you don't want to be locked up for such a short time and want to have T&D for weeks/months to go?
We have talked about this, she cant seem to understand why I would want to be denied. Shes let me put it back on, and says she will make me wait longer this time but I feel like I'm calling all the shots. Are there any goddesses out there that could offer me or her any guidance or advice?
I wonder if you're going too fast at this point? Maybe you need to be a little more patient with her accepting her role. Give her time to realize this "power she could have" over you. In the meantime if you can point her to some material like the The Guide to Keyholders for instance? http://www.amazon.com/Male-Chastity-Keyholders-Lucy-Fairbourne/dp/1905605145 There's a good review of it and other books in the Library section of the Mansion.
I think I have been going too fast with her. What fun is surrender if your partner doesn't want? She is having some fun now, I just need to let her do her thing. I emailed her the link you posted thanks again!
You can also point her to the Male Chastity Blog. There are some good hints & tips there as well, for both the KH and the sub. My wife let me come 6 days ago. She did this after she had put me in a straight jacked with my arms tied to my back, wearing a hood and a face gag-harness, she whipped my ass big-time and penetrated my ass with the back of the whip *gets horny again* Next day I put on the CB again and she was sad at first, but now enjoys me in the CB again
Thank you all so much. It goes without saying that there is going to be a HUGE learning curve as we both try to figure this out
i always used to feel depressed after i cum, so now Mistress dont let me cum, i dont feels so depressed.
Sometimes there is a big disconnect between what you want from your sex life and what she wants. What if, from your original post, she really enjoys fucking you? If your sex games make her horny, she may then want to feel you inside of her... as the fulfillment of all the sex play. Don't forget! She has a pussy. Believe it or not she may actually enjoy having your cock in there for pleasurable sex. You and she need to talk this out so you BOTH get something out of it. And be very afraid of cuckolding as the solution. You may find yourself lock up forever. Marcus
That sounds like the problem I had for a while until I just kept bringing the topic up of not being allowed to cum. Now she loves it and going on week three. Would have been longer but I messed up and came. Another thing that my girl(mistress) did one time was make it an order that I was not allowed to cum until she came five times. Now we have a new order in play...I am not allowed to cum until I fuck a guy, get fucked by a guy and suck a guy while she watches. That turns her on so much, especially since I am not even bi. It turns me on too. t
it seems like a lot of people have the "depressed" feeling after being allowed to orgasm. I can count myself in on that to a certain point as well. As others have said, you may be going a bit quickly for this. For my wife/kh and I, it was a slower buildup of time in lockup that has seemed to reach a pleasing point for both of us. Contrary to what some may say, my wife/kh and I view chastity as something along the lines of BDSM, in that the submissive/chaste is only in that state because they wish to be. If something goes wrong or either side wants to end/safeword out the play stops. This is just a matter of being safe and sane in our way of thinking. To that end, topping from the bottom can be expected to a certain extent and should not be considered a failure until you both really understand what each other wants and gets out of the lifestyle.
Janders, that is exactly the advice I was looking for! Relax, slow down, communication is the key. Thank you so much for the insight