My "chastity cuckold" lifestyle with my wife has grown to a level of intensity that is very emotional for me. We are almost at a "point of no return" and it is so thrilling that I am afraid of it. I am looking for input from my friends here at the Chastity Mansion. Background: My wife and I met ten years ago. I responded to an ad she posted (her first time doing so) seeking a submissive male for a relationship. She had come out of a very abusive relationship and at her girlfriend's urging, sought a man who would worship and adore her. I had gone through several failed relationships as well because I could not satisfy a woman in a vanilla relationship. I wanted a Domme wife and she wanted a submissive husband. We both wanted cuckolding (she told me upfront that she was not attracted to me sexually. ie, no interest in fucking me). I introduced her to male chastity for subs like me and she absolutely adores it. She likes me horny for her at all times. I did suffer chastity for longer and longer periods of time (up to six months). She actively used my mouth for oral satisfaction and she had many men and couples as lovers. Long periods or orgasm denial were tough on me but it really deepened her Domme feelings and my submissive feelings. Current Situation: James is my wife's lover for several years now. Last year, she did not see him for several months (she said her feelings for him were getting too strong) and her sex drive dropped to near zero. She had a couple of other very capable lovers but she simply was not in to it at all. My sex life with her dropped to zero as well. We were both miserable. James and my wife reconnected this year and all three of us decided to just let it go where it will go. His relationship with my wife has stirred up very emotional feelings in me (jealousy, envy, etc) all these years. I am trying to document all this in my blog. We are in the midst of creating a three person, poly, relationship. The sex between them is so intense that allo three of us are overwhelmed. I am usually kept in chastity and am limited to assisting them in their lovemaking. Lots of arousal activities for me but no orgasm, no touching, just locked up. My Problem: They are so hot for one another on a daily basis that it overwhelms me. Six months now and there is no sign of it cooling down. My wife is in "cock lust" for him at all times. When they go out as a couple (I tag along, wearing my heavy nose ring for everyone to see), they are very charismatic and everyone we meet wants to get to know them. I have been outed to all our friends and family as her cuckolded husband who adores her but is impotent and cannot provide her the sex she needs (everyone accepts this as they would not understand submission and chastity). I have resolved my lifestyle with my wife. I accept James as her true partner. She is my Queen and he is my King. I am having so much "submissive cuckold" sex now with them that I look forward to it every day. BUT ... for some reason, I cannot maintain a "chaste" orgasm denial state. Unlike previous periods of orgasm denial, now with them, I am aroused beyond belief. I am intensely jealous of the pleasure (blow jobs and intercourse) he gets from her. She is filled with lust for him at all times. She has never shown any lust for me. She wants nothing to do with my penis and wants it locked up full time. She wants me to be her personal eunuch slave. She loves the connection we have as Domme and submissive. She loves the lust I have for her and she feeds off it. She loves how I pamper and spoil her, worship and adore her. She does spend considerable time arousing my submission. I have never known such intense and deeply submissive feelings towards a woman. Fantasy is now reality for me. ...and yet, I feel a need to orgasm like I have never felt it before in my life. When they have orgasms, the intensity is too much for me. I feel so inadequate becuse I cannot inspire lust in her for me like she has for James. She has let me cum (in front of both of them) a couple of times over the past three months for the humiliation value. I did so with great relish. I wanked while sniffing a pair of her panties (the only way I have ever cum for her). I begged her over and over to let me cum. Finally, she allowed me to cum on those couple of ocassions. I certainly was a pathetic sight to him. so here I am...feeling unworthy of sex, feeling deeply submissive to her (and him), creating a thrilling lifestyle for all three of us, having the best sex of my life, ...and I cannot handle long term chastity. I deserve long term chastity. But I jealously and selfishly get cranky with her because I want to cum just like they do (very frequently). How do any of you long term chastity males handle it????? marcus