Your children and you.

Discussion in 'Chastity and orgasm denial' started by Aleks_ak, Dec 24, 2023.

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  1. Aleks_ak
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    Aleks_ak Long term member

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    Do your children know about your chastity?
    For me personally, it would be awkward if my children found out about me.
    I'm afraid I won't be able to explain what I'm passionate about.
    And how are things in your families?
     
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  2. R2002
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    R2002 Long term member

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    My two children, both of whom ate young adults, do not know
     
  3. R2002
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    R2002 Long term member

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    "Are" not "ate"
     
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  4. SlaveBoy73
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    SlaveBoy73 Long term member

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    I was gonna say if they eat young adults then your chastity is the least of their concerns.

    typos…amirite?
     
  5. SteveTheGoldfish
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    I think it's important to keep a veil between our everyday lives and our kink lifestyle.

    And that means not leaving cages lying about and not mentioning it.

    I can't imagine I would want to know the kink proclivities of my family, so I wouldn't want to share mine with them (I did once find my brother's cage, but thought it best not to mention)

    I think it is worth thinking of the practicalities of wearing a cage if you are likely to be working with kids. They will eventually throw a ball into your crotch while playing catch, kids might run into you more than adults.
     
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  6. SteveTheGoldfish
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    I also don't think there is anything immorally deviant about using chastity while also being responsible for kids.

    Plenty of our vanilla friends will be getting there sex by a quicky after settling the kid with paw patrol to watch and some chicken dinosaurs.

    You have responsibilities, sometimes they are just the other side of a door to your sex life.

    But then I picked up grief here.for asking about how to balance kink with being a teacher.
     
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  7. The Queens consort
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    The Queens consort Long term member

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    We have an adult son living with us, and as far as we know, he is unaware of our diversion. We work hard to keep it that way.
     
  8. Mr_anonymous
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    Why would you even consider informing your kids of your kinks?
     
  9. knightly
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    knightly Long term member

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    I like the question "Why would you even consider informing your kids of your kinks?"

    Our kids are entering their teens, and we want to find a good balance of introducing topics and sharing things as they learn about themselves and their own bodies. We've worked hard to unwind our own shame and societal scripts about our sexuality, and strive to take a more open, honest, and realistic approach with them.

    We wouldn't necessarily proactively inform our kids about our kinks, but also want them to understand the context to kinks (in general), why people have them, and what they mean. If the context is then appropriate to share our own kinks and desires, we'd likely share them.

    If I'd have had someone to sit down with as I entered my teens and have candid conversations about sexuality, it would have saved a lifetime of confusion, shame, guilt and insecurity. If we approach from a context of hiding it, our kids will get the message that their sexuality is not OK.

    Same as with friends, I don't mind my wife sharing what we do with close friends if the context is right. It hasn't been yet. Even as close as we are with some couples, it has been challenging to meet in the same place, have really deep, meaningful, vulnerable conversations. We may test the waters, but if people "aren't there" or ready for it, we don't push it.
     
  10. SteveTheGoldfish
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    That's the point I'm making.

    Great to sit down with kids and make sure they know all about safe contraception and the nature of consent, but they don't need any input on fetishism
     
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  11. Mr_anonymous
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    When the time comes I agree with "the talk". That said you keep your children and kinks separate.
     
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  12. Queens servant73
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    Queens servant73 Long term member

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    We have four kids, now all adults, the youngest is 20 and still at home for now. We’ve always been open about sex and other topics that our parents weren’t necessarily very open about with us.
    Our kids know that their parents are still crazy about each other after all these years, that we have always had an active sex life and still do, but they do not know what kinks we are into. There’s no reason for them to know anything about those.
     
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  13. Shibmo
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    Two kids, 2 and 4.
    Different than most who have replied. Of course they don’t know. I’m perfectly capable of not being naked around the kids.

    Might become a bit more difficult when they get older tough.

    Sometimes they want to sit on my lap, and I feel the cage move. That’s quite an awkward moment, so I try to position in such a way, that that doesn’t happen.
    They don’t need to notice.
     
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  14. Susanstoy91
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    Our daughter is in her early 40's. My Wife (KH) and her are very close, but I doubt my Wife would ever tell her. But, you never know I guess...And she is my Step-daughter since she was six.
     
  15. madams-sissysub
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    We don’t have kids, but going the reverse my Madam shared most of what we do, minus the details, with her mom. This has always made me uncomfortable as I wouldn’t dream of telling my parents Anything about kinks or even sex!
    But my Madam will tell her mom! And she will tell my Madam to! And it’s just the way they are.
    I’ve just came to accept this is both sides of the argument.
     
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  16. SteveTheGoldfish
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    Essentially when everyone is an adult then it's more a case of making sure not to scare anyone vanilla or do anything that squicks you.

    Telling my mum about chastity would not work for me, but I don't have any moral objection to someone telling their mum.

    I think we all here agree that we shouldn't be telling kids about chastity, and that doesn't need any more discussion.

    Instead I think we should discuss the practicalities, the how we make sure that little Timmy doesn't find out.

    Simple things like keeping the devices stored away (along with the dildos and whips) are obvious.

    But other things are not:

    * Kids get daft and run into you.

    * Kids climb over you.

    * Kids wake you up when you are sleeping.

    These are the practicalities of parenting, and I do not think it is morally repugnant for a parent.to want an open minded sex life which they need to keep from their kids. There's every chance my mother had to hastily hide a dildo while I was a kid watching Sesame Street
     
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  17. littleguy3
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    littleguy3 Adoring husband

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    We never had an open dialogue about sexuality when we were raising our kids. We were raised in homes where sex was NEVER discussed. That bled over into our marriage. Now, my wife and I openly discuss our sex lives with each other and somewhat with friends. But our kids don't want to hear anything about it now because it makes them uncomfortable. We have great regrets about this because we missed out on healthy sexuality and in guiding our children in one of the most important areas of life.
     
  18. Chili-boy
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    Chili-boy Long term member

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    Absolutely not. It’s our little thing. They also don’t know I am going to have my bottom caned by a lady tomorrow
     
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  19. Mojoman
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    I think it's totally inappropriate to tell anyone (kids, family, friends, etc.) about what you get up to sex-wise and especially not kink sex-wise.

    If you have friends at your local adult kink club, that's a different matter altogether.
     
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  20. Deleted member 109631
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    I feel it's like anything else that goes on in the bed room between husband and wife. The children don't need to know, and I doubt they want to know. They prob have some idea that things go on (especially if they're older and know how things work) but again they don't want to know specifics etc.

    Just like the on going argument of chastity lifestyle and morals telling your kids or some how involving them especially if they did not come to you and ask about it specifically is not something you share with your kids/family etc.
     
  21. Dmitry
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    No way I would like any of my six children know: me caged, me being lashed, cuffed, me wearing woman nughties, me being pegged by my wife.
     
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  22. true42
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    To the best of knowledge, my kids don't know.

    But it's obvious now that I respect and obey my wife, which is a big difference since we started this chastity journey a few years back. They've never really asked about it, though.
     
  23. Aleks_ak
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    Aleks_ak Long term member

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    Thank you all for your sincere answers!
    Indeed, chastity is the personal intimate life of parents, and children have no place there.
     
  24. Cuck247
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    As far as we are aware nobody knows about me being caged. Our daughter knows her mum has had lovers and she used to try feel my pierced nipples much to my annoyance when she was younger. She will have seen my collar but has never commented.

    She didnt follow us into this LS becoming a prude.
     
  25. rbruns
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    I would have to say hell no! My wife and I have been very secretive about the use of a CD during our times with young kids. Both my kids are grown now and I think it would have been hard to explain this type of situation to them. You need to keep them innocent as long as you can. It definitely adds a challenge to the mix but it is well worth keeping it a secret.
     
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