10/12 Lockup 5 day 12 Wednesday. What to say. This past Sunday was sort of a reset because Amy made me orgasm with my cage still on. There was the expected drop and by now I am building up again. I haven’t been too into Locktober since then mentally. Just wearing the cage and living normal life. Finally discovered that a dab of baby lotion where the ring contacts my scrotum is perfect to prevent bunching up and swelling. This means I can enjoy excercise on the bike and our morning walks. the cage is quite comfortable. With my weight loss I like the way it all looks down there much better than before. Why am I not recounting the erotic encounter from Sunday night? I don’t know it was weird. Amy was quite drunk and clearly wanted sex when we got in bed. As soon as I got under the covers she backed up to me and pressed her ass into my cage as hard as she ever has and started asking me what I wanted from her as a wife in that very moment. Well duh. I went with something low key: want to suck on your tits. Which was certainly true but maybe not the whole story of where my mind was. It kind of went from there, a little back and forth, a little start and stop like she wanted me but didn’t exactly like what she was getting. We tried basic kissing and breast foreplay, I tried going down for a minute, she flipped over and made me spank her. None of it really scratched her itch. And her manner and tone with me was weird—“is this your pussy? Whose pussy is it? Say it!” I’m like ok but what, is this supposed to be hot? It felt like a big act. I honestly think she is unsure how to be herself when she is horny and I’m locked. She’s not a pure dom, more of a switch, and this time I could tell she wanted me to just take her. But I’m in no position to actually do that. The power / responsibility of being keyholder just gets in her way I guess when she wants it that way? Bottom line she gave me confusing signals and I was totally turned on, don’t get me wrong, but also a little lost — “my pussy is so wet, I don’t care if it’s locked, just fuck my pussy. Fuck me with your caged cock…” so I did my best, what ended up doing the trick after all that was some grinding on her clit with the small portion of my shaft that sticks out from the base of the cage when I’m hard. And I’m sure the plastic was also rubbing hard on her but she was into it or at least pretending to be. And then like all of a sudden I’m coming a heavy load into my boxers and it all comes to a screeching halt. So awkward and mutually unsatisfying. Luckily Amy doesn’t remember as much as I do. The end. Plenty I could share about days 2-12. More interesting psychologically and physiologically, though completely free of any sexual play. Maybe another time.
Lockup 5 day 14 hitting the two week mark and definitely getting more into the zen state. Loving the constant “dopamine bath” as someone on here recently described it. Not even really thinking about sex most of the time. Not interested in looking at porn or trying to get Amy to play. Just being in touch with my body—mindful of what it wants and needs, the tensions, the tingles. But I’ve noticed now that when the thoughts and feelings do come, they seem to hit harder. Less frequent, but more concentrated. I can be at work, in a meeting for instance, totally focused on the meeting one minute — and the next minute I’m having intense desire to fuck my wife or a sort of obsessive desperation to rip off the cage and touch myself. And then it will leave me as suddenly as it came.