How old is too old

Discussion in 'Female led relationships' started by DeesHubby, Nov 14, 2011.

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  1. slave phil
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    slave phil slave phil

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    Grateful too!! :)
     
  2. dboy
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    dboy Junior Member

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    I feel too old.

    I'm a healthy, horny, 61 and just tried out self chastity for the 3rd time, this time going 3 weeks. I edged a great deal to accelerate things and felt little difference in my state of mind, and I really wasn't much hornier than normal. Maybe I need to try a few more times in an effort to reach 'chastity nirvana'. Maybe I need to a longer duration but if 3 weeks has little effect, I think I would need months, and this seems a bit much at this point. Most here seem to reach that 'happy' stage in a few weeks at the most.

    I'll try some more but feel very let down as I would like to introduce this to my wife and want to make sure I enjoy it first. You see, I don't have the natural desire for chastity as most here but after reading of the effects I would like to experience the lifestyle some more.

    Any suggestions or ideas would be greatly appreciated.

    Thanks.
     
  3. Dumb1
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    Dumb1 senior member

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    Hi Dboy it seems that it isnt only the youth of today who are impatient for things to HAPPEN straight away some of us older members of the population seem to also want it NOW!. The point of chastity is not JUST a quick thrill or a heightened sense of euphoria for the wearer within a set timescale, its about committment to something or someone else. True to some the actual locking of a device causes huge sexual responses almost instantly but if this is what you are after prepare to be disappointed as this can be a false effect that will soon go and leave in its place deep frustration at there being NOTHING ELSE. I love being locked in my chastity belt by my wife for however long SHE thinks i need to be in it but in my case it is to help me focus my attentions on what is important HER. She gives me pleasure in so many ways and like a lot of males i sometimes take that for granted and the chastity concept helps keep my mind focused and aware of all she does for me. You can wear a device for a quick thrill and there is nothing wrong with that but in my mind the device is just a physical barrier that is there day and night to remind you of person who is most important to you the keyholder. Give it time nothing worth having is instant and things that are instant soon get boring and mundane and lose their appeal when the next fad comes along. :manga_angry:
     
  4. dboy
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    dboy Junior Member

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    Stroppy,

    Thanks for your reply. I didn't mean to come across as a quick thrill seeker, although that may have been the tone. I just want to see if I'll like chastity. As I've said it's not a fetish of mine or even a desire (at this point) to have my wife control my orgasms. I assume not all males enjoy chastity so I want to see if I'm one of them before I go to the trouble of starting it with my wife, possibly going through the trouble and expense of purchasing and breaking in a device. I can and do have the focus on my wife already, and no problem satisfying her, but I'm sure chastity can be of benefit.

    I have noticed that many, even older folks, have experienced rather extreme changes even when self locked, no wife involved, no one to focus their attentions on. So I assumed I would have similar experiences but have not and feel quite let down.

    Perhaps I need more experience to get into the proper headspace. I'll keep trying. But my feeling is I should get something out of it before telling my wife about it with all of the possible weird reactions I will get, and then quitting later if I still don't like it.
     
  5. Dumb1
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    Dumb1 senior member

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    I have to say i am in agreement with Sarah who writes the book be careful what you wish for and does a blog on this subject in that Most people who practice chastity in their lifestyle do it because it is a fetish or a secret desire of THEIRS to be locked one way or another or to be restricted by someone or something from having access to pleasuring themselves at will. I have never believed the old story of someone being FORCED into chastity and kept in it against their will it just isn,t really possible in the real world and so to try and test out whether wearing a chastity belt or similar might prove to be a turn on or not for you seems unlikely if you dont already have this desire already inbuilt. To me the belt is like a comfort blanket when its on and has the reaction of reassuring me that i am under someone elses control and this turns me on incredibly but i always knew it would from a very early age when i would dream of being caged, if all you want is a new way of getting excited in the run up to sex then maybe it will work in a small way but the emotions you have read about chastity belt wearing comes from people who have also been fantasising about this for years and who relish the thought that they are now living their fantasy for real. Once the device is on it can get quite boring in the real world and sometimes uncomfortable and unyielding but the thought that you have no access until its removal is what spurs us on through this barrier. If you are having trouble convincing yourself its a good idea then GOOD luck convincing your partner also. I hope you do grow to love it as much as we here do most partners who are introduced to the idea by their partners who have always dreamt of it happening to them take quite a while to get to see some if any advantages to them that chastity can bring. Most will be put off by the mere thought of it and take many months to actually come to terms with it if ever. Be patient , buy an inexpensive device to try out yourself and dont think it will make you instantly horny it wont! you may get erect instantly as you fiddle with it but that soon turns to discomfort once the novelty wears off and remember YOU need to love the idea first before you have any chance of persuading your wife to give it a try as she just might like the idea herself and then you would be in trouble. Good Luck
     
  6. dboy
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    dboy Junior Member

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    Stroppy,

    Good advice and my wife may just love it too much. What I'm really saying in my post is that, in a purely physical sense, any man who doesn't ejaculate for a certain period of time will start to feel certain effects, such as an increase in energy, etc. as described in this forum and others. These feelings should be present whether or not chastity is a desired thing. These will be stronger in younger men with more testosterone.

    So I read about others older than myself in this thread and I wonder why I didn't feel these effects or felt them very weakly, it wouldn't seem I'm too old. Perhaps I don't have as much testosterone as I think. Maybe I need more time 'locked' to feel the effects, although almost everyone says after 2 weeks, major effects are felt. Perhaps I need to be more sensitized through repeated trials.

    There is also a metaphysical benefit of not ejactulating and channeling the sexual energy, according to many Eastern teachings. I suspect that part of the reason many men here are so happy is because they have channelled this sexual energy into a higher form of love energy and have attained a certain spiritual 'enlightenment'.

    So, if I may ask, do you attain a certain Zen state after a while and how long does it take?

    I have read of a number of men who, like myself, have tried chastity for the higher benefits (like better relationship or Tantra) and have come to enjoy it. My 'experiments' were easy to deal with and have brought some interesting feelings. I think it would be an enhancement to my love life and perhaps become more as time passes.

    The jury is still out but I will continue. Thanks again for your good advice.
     
  7. Mistress Deborah
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    Mistress Deborah Long term member

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    A very interesting thread,
    My partner and I have been into chastity and all that it brings only for a short time-probably 10 months but I have been shocked by how much it has affected our lives and the way that it has heightened our feelings .

    Due to several cuts and sores my partner is often unable to wear his device as he has to heal and during this time we both always comment after several days how there is something missing, the way we are towards each other and the complete love we have for each other somehow gets to show itself in different ways.
    This isn't to say that chastity defines our love, that is always there, but it somehow increases the brain's desires- the complete wanting, the aching need for that person and the total overtaking of all that is in your life at the time, be it work , play or engagements etc..

    The wearing of the device is a real term of endurance for my partner, not just the orgasm denial but the physical pain, being uncomfortable sometimes, the wondering whether it shows etc.
    He will often have sores, his skin gets rubbed and often he can't sleep due to the pain- all of this makes me full of admiration for his plight, he always takes it to the end and i have great admiration for him.


    We are both in our forties and I believe that our experience of life and lovers all brings the mix together and the fact that we both love each other and totally trust in all that we do makes chastity work for us.

    As a young woman sex was usually quite dull, unless you were lucky and met someone who was imaginative in bed.
    During my previous marriage sex soon fell to the wayside and was desperately dull.
    My labido has always been strong and I found this side of my life very frustrating as I was not satisfied both sexually and mentally, hence why I divorced him lol !!

    My life now is very different - I am happy, healthy,sexually fulfilled and have met a fantastic guy who seriously rocks my world !
    He introduced me to chastity and although it can be a very hard game to play with all of it's twists and turns I would definitely recommend the lifestyle and feel that it has enhanced both of our lives.
     
  8. Wolfie
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    Wolfie wolfie

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    Your never to "old" as age is rather a ficticious concept... What is old to one, is not neccesarily old to another.. I remember when I thought 30 was old and now I am double that age.. (hmmmmm, does that then make me ancient? ;) I began getting interested in Chastity well over ten years ago and found that it was a major turn on... To allow a woman to control your orgasm and own that special part of oneself was and still is rather mindblowing... I have been into chastity on various levels, tried many devices and found the whole experience fun and exciting. I think that Chastity is something that actually helps me keep my youth as well as my sense of humor...
     
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