Not 100% sure I belong here

Discussion in 'Introductions' started by Subdavid, May 6, 2011.

  1. Subdavid
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    Subdavid New member

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    Hello all,

    I am not sure if I really belong here, but if I describe my situation as honestly as possible then it might help. 

    I am 37 yo married submissive male. My wife does not know about my submissive/fetish feelings. She travels for a week or two a few times a year and when does I used to crossdress a lot, I had an impressive maids outfit, and I used to appear on webcam as a submissive for people. About a year ago I went through a purge as I hoped that would stop the guilt I felt when I cross dressed and went on webcam. Since then when she goes away it seems I am constantly watching Internet porn or talking on phone sex lines and whenever I orgasam I feel guilty, but I am weak and I am in the same cycle again in less than a couple of hours. 

    I do realise that my submissive feelings would be impossible to supress, but I am hoping that chastity while my wife is away would stop me masturbating and stop the feelings of guilt, but would allow my submissive feelings. 

    I suppose I am here to get advice and see if I placed myself I chastity while my wife is away would help me. And also any suggestions that people may have in the next way I could about this. In reality are there things such as online keyholders who would check and hold a key, or one idea I had was to perhaps freeze the key in and ice cube, that way I could get to it in an emergency, but would be very difficult. 

    Anyway suppose I had better stop rambling now

    David
     
  2. tiemeupalso
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    tiemeupalso Long term member

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    have you discussed any of this with your wife?
    yo never know,she might enjoy your feelings,mabey not all some at least some.
     
  3. Subdavid
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    Subdavid New member

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    Unfortunately when I have bought up things of a kinky nature she has leaned away from them. She comes from a very conservative background
     
  4. somwguy335
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    somwguy335 Junior Member

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    Is it possible you could hide the key on her somewhere before she goes? Pin it in a piece of luggage, leave it in her car where she won't find it if she travels by car.
     
  5. Subdavid
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    Subdavid New member

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    Would love to try that, but as this would be my first time chastity I might the key available if it is not fitted properly. Also as she is not aware I could not put it on before she leaves and remove it before she returns
     
  6. Jamesshaw78
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    Jamesshaw78 New member

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    You need the program Timelock to secure your key. then a remote keyholder could control you.
    Or is it really control you're after?
     
  7. Subdavid
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    Subdavid New member

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    I suppose I had not really thought about the difference between chastity and control. I think the reason I have started considering chastity is that it can be a way that I can be controlled by a Mistress.
     
  8. Shimone
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    Shimone Long term member

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    welcome to the club :)

    without the aim of extending chaste periods more and more I considder chastity just as another kind of control, too. But truth to tell in reality the difference isn't that big...
     
  9. Kali
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    Kali No access to my Member

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    Why do you want to lie to your wife?

    If you aren't willing to even try to talk to her about this, iit doesn't speak well of the stability of the relationship.

    All you are doing is exchanging one guilty pleasure for another.
     
  10. Bemygurl
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    Bemygurl New member

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    I have to agree with kali. from my personal experience, trying to hide your secret from your significant other often end up in a big costly mess... Try to come clean to her. I think she deserves it. If not, try to divert your hobby into another one. Keep faith, it's not an easy road.
     
  11. jerry locked
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    jerry locked Member

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    Agreed. Talk to your wife. You may want to check for information on how to introduce your wife or girl friend to chastity. The fact that your wife is very conservative should not be an issue; many keyholding females ARE rather conservative or even religious. Be careful, though, your wife may really get deep in domination, especially if you get locked and become her loyal and dedicated submissive. It could be quite an adventure for both of you. Communication is imperative!
     
    Kristie Peel likes this.
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