cynthia's triumphs and tragedies

Ms Linda,

i really do appreciate the words of kindness and the encouragement. i do have to ask as i look at the picture with You and GJ, have You cut Your hair or is it just pulled back in that picture. i do get out a lot and aside from my own family i do not feel like i am being judged and i live a very adjusted life. i love the girl who has appeared and looks back at me every morning as i prepare for the day and know that i continue to ever grow not only as the female i was meant to be, but also as Mistresses slave. the transition in both instances is incredible and i would not trade the experience for anything.

You are a doll and i am inspired by Your strength and perserverence. i do hope You enjoyed Your time with GJ and john over the holiday weekend, bet it was wonderful in Chi town...

cynthia

 

The neighbor has come around...

Yesterday was met with my neighbor finally coming around and talking to me again. i think after the initial shock of seeing me in skirts and dresses on nearly a daily basis she has come to realize i am still the same genuine nice person she met as a male nearly a year ago. She shared some with me again and asked about the arrangement i had with my parents to stay here as she may be getting remarried and moving to virginia. Her curiosity got the best of her and she did want to know if i intended to go through with the surgery. Of course i said yes and it felt good to have her back in my life again. She did tell me that several of the neighbors have talked to her about me and have asked about how she felt living next to me. i had to laugh as none of them has met me yet and their own closed minds have prevented them from meeting a wonderful girl who would literally give the clothes off her back to help another in need. i loved her response, she said that it did not bother her as i kept to myself and did not push myself on others. She has been a help early on and did not realize what i meant when i told her i was truly the black sheep in my family, but now she does.

A bit later she asked if i would put low lights into her daughters hair, so i will be bringing home a color book tomorrow to figure out what she is looking for and going shopping for the color and developer later in the week to be able to do it this Friday evening. Should be fairly simple actually and something i am able to do with ease. Wish i could get her into the salon, but i understand a desire to save some money. i will at least get some compensation out of it and will be good practice for me. It was comforting that she has gotten past the judgemental stage and is once again talking to me. i do grow on people at times.

My son has seen me in school and is surprised to see that i am well liked. i don't think he has ever seen that side of me. A lot of that comes from my willingness to lend a hand to help others out and expect nothing in return. Go figure, a slave like me willing to give of myself for the benefit of others, Who knew! i am feeling particularly beautiful on the inside today and have my neighbor to thank...

cynthia

 

the bath...

OMG that was absolutely amazing and so needed. It felt so good to sink into the tub, surrounded by candles and calgon lavender bath beads in the water. It was heavently and a soak for a good 45 minutes, a nice glass of chablis and i was in girlie heaven. To melt away the troubles of the last few days and let the warm water transport me to a very beautiful place. i so needed some me time...

cynthia

ps don't ask how i got the second picture, it took some finagling

 

Nasty feet...

Part of my chosen career that can at times be quite unpleasant is pedicures. For the most part i am not bothered by giving them, but yesterday i encountered the worst feet i had seen yet. Bad enough that i actually wore gloves for the entire procedure. i normally only wear gloves to remove the polish so not to damage my own nails, but yesterday was a first. The school is offering as a special for the months of june and july $9 pedicures from monday thru thursday and we have seen a huge spike in clientele. So much that we actually ran out of one line of pedicure supples and are now working with the very expensive line because the school does not get to order supplies until the next new class starts which is next monday. Any way, this lady who was quite pleasant but really unable to maintain her feet. The lails were extremely long and as thick as two maybe three quarters. The skin in between the toes was peeling and i am sure there was quite a case of tinea going on there. i took one for the team yesterday and some how managed to keep my stomach down. It was a difficult task, but i remained professional all the way through it. It took me longer than normal as She somehow managed to get the lip of the disposable liner to the soak bent into the tub and water was everywhere and i had to retrieve several towlels to contain the mess. It was a rough task, but a good test of my committment to working in this profession...

cynthia

 

An update,

Many are aware that this girl had moved to Mistress Rob's on the 25th of July and has now been here for three weeks. The life that many may at first be envious of is much more difficult than what it appears to be. The commitment has to be complete or not even worth trying. There is much that has happened and still trying to settle in and learn her new role.

Just learning to cook for Mistress and riki takes a lot of concentration and learning whole new food groups. There have been moments of elation and others of total disappointment. The disappointment normally comes with this girls lack of attention to the little things that seem to eventually catch up with her and cause great distress. The routine is fairly well set, at least until school starts in four weeks.

This girl is officially a resident here with her most feminine picture on her drivers license to date and is also registered to vote. The list of special tasks completed and new ones taking their place. Working as a stage hand at the state fair for three of the headline country acts next week. Fully integrated into the Veterans Administration Medical center here and enrolled in cosmetology school for the second thousand hours.

Life is good and a true privelige to wake here in the house with this girls Goddess near by. Each new day, an opportunity to correct the mistakes of yesterday and prove devotion to Her and riki. The days are long and full, this girl remains busy much of the day taking care of the little things around the house and trying to get a grip on meal planning and using the imagination to come up with new and pleasurable dishes to make. It has been work, but a labor of love and no doubt that this is where this girl belongs. Home...

submissively

Mistress Rob's slave

 

Living with a piercer...


Four weeks have now passed since arriving, hard to believe how time flies. Life is far from routine, yet fairly predictable. This week found this girl working as a stage hand at the state fair for Jason Aldean, Lady Antibellum and Justin Moore. It was fun to get the feet wet again and work in a field that is very familiar to this girl. Did well enough to be asked back and not a word was said about this girl being transgendered. Incredible how tolerant people have become. A wonderful week really and ended with the piece d' resistance today. As promised, this girls nipples would be pierced before the end of august, and today was the day.

A love/hate thing again. Love the result, just hate the path that has to be taken to get there. Riki, the resident piercer of course is owned by Mistress Rob and a huge part of the equation here. He did the piercing and of course Mistress was there to encourage as well. This girl had to ask to be pierced, which she did, as it was really wanted. The price is sometimes great, but the result is wonderful. Mistress put a gag in to keep this girl quiet and instructed her only to nod. Fail!!! Riki had trouble getting the clamp on partly because many parts of this girl are tiny including nipples and secondly the breast bud has started to develop and is hard and right under the nipple. He eventually got the clamp in place, it freaking hurts and takes the breath. This girl panted worse than a dog during this whole ordeal and then the needle, not sure of the gauge, took what seemed forever to get through the nipple and this girl could just not be totally quiet as hard as she tried. Finally one down and one left. Of course forgot to mention, the nipples had been pierced in 1987 and let them heal over and so there was scar tissue there as well, making it more difficult for the needle to pass through.

On to the second one. riki making light of the situation, meanwhile this girl is nearly hyperventilating. Again, trouble getting the clamp on and finally searing success that had this girl making more noise than none. The needle hurt incredibly and finally through and breathing easy again. Still did not see as it is better that way and thankfully was laying on the floor already as this girl is very squeamish when it comes to needles. Mistress was pleased that this girl only yelped a bit and had to tell her to be quiet a few times. The gag out and finally got to see the result. So happy they are finally pierced and that part of the ordeal over with. They look nice and riki really does do a nice job. This girl thanked Mistress for the piercing and riki as well for doing the work. Sorry if more noise was made than necessary, this girl did try to stay as still as possible.

The day ended with this girl coloring and cutting Mistress' hair. A job that this girl was trained for and thankfully it was a lot simpler than anticipated. This girl played it safe and possibly a little too conservative, but more can always be taken off, none can be put back on though. Just cleaned up the line at the neck and took off about half an inch. It was quite simple actually and felt pretty good as well despite having to cut part of it kneeling on the floor as there is no salon chair in the house. Perhaps someday the chair in this girls room will get replaced with a hydraulic chair to make the work a little easier. Just a thought...

Life continues to move forward and this girl is so grateful for what she has been given in this life. No regrets for the decision to be here and serve full time. This girls life continues to become simpler and so wonderful that the main focus is Mistress and riki. This girl has been blessed and has a most caring and concerned Mistress that really does look after her best interests. Thank You Mistress and riki for the continued faith in this girls abilities to serve the two of Y/you. A wonderful way to celebrate four weeks here. Thank You for the piercing, it is gorgeous and brings a smile when this girl sees them...

Tiff, rachel and susie, this girl feels your pain and is now a member of the club of those pierced by riki. Nothing to brag about, just that this girl survived and lived to tell the tale. Thanks for going before this girl...


submissively

Mistress Rob's slave

 

Somehow the words get misconstrued and this girl meant no ill will or even to imply that riki made light of her pain. Riki makes small talk to distract and to steady himself. He in no way was so callous to make light of what this girl was going through. Please do not take it for more than what it was. Riki was incredible and did it as quickly and painlessly as possible. The nature of the piercing is as it is and this girl made it more difficult by letting an old piercing grow over. This girl could think of no other person she would rather have done the piercing and was honored to have him do it. Small talk or not, he does wonderful work and am so very glad he is part of this girls life...

submissively

Misress Rob's slave

 

An apology to Mistress Rob...

Mistress Rob,

This girl is sorry for her lack of attention and allowing herself to get distracted and leave the curling iron turned on and unattended in the bathroom. It was mortifying to realize she had been so careless to walk away and leave a potential fire hazard turned on. This girl promises it will be an isolated incident and no way indicitive of how she cares for You and Your home. There is no reason that this girl should not have taken a moment and unplugged the iron before attending to other chores and she is truly sorry for this grave moment of stupidity on her part. You have been most gracious Mistress and this girl is sorry for the breach of trust and placing doubt in her abilities to properly care for Your home and property. Please forgive this girl for her lack of respect for Your home and safety. It will not happen again Mistress.

submissively

Mistress Rob's slave

 

Mistress Rob and riki,

Nearly a month has passed and once again the reality of this life strikes. This girl can not begin to find the words of sorrow she feels for her gross breach of trust yesterday in not ensuring that You both were up in a timely manner. A moment that should have come as instinct and yet this girl froze and did nothing to check and ensure You both were ok. Mistress Your displeasure hurts deeply and failure is something this girl works so hard to avoid, yet at moments that should be shining of her devotion, seem to turn into total disaster. Mistress, this girls heart remains pure and she begs Your forgiveness once again for her lack of judgement and action. It will not occur again. You and riki remain the focus and purpose of her life and she begs Your forgiveness for this moment of indiscretion...

submissively

Mistress Rob's slave

 

An incredible revelation...

Sitting in a hotel room in Charlotte, NC waiting to attend a hair show over the weekend, this girl finds her mind pining for home, missing Mistress and riki. The feeling of abandonment and neglecting of duties. The first time away since arriving and longing to be home.

An incredible time of reflection and the realization that this girls dreams have literally come true. Living life fultime as a female and the slave of a very kind and compassionate Mistress and Her mate. Knowing that She is the purpose of this girls life and center of her universe. That She has become the core focus and all else seems trivial.

Mistress Rob, thank You for this incredible opportunity to expand the skills needed to become a successful stylist. You are missed and thoughts of You and home remain constant. Will travel safely and return home tomorrow. You are missed greatly and a feeling of emptiness fills this girls heart. Thank You again for the privelige of serving You and riki.

submissively

Mistress Rob's slave

 

An update...

As Mistress Michelle pointed out to this girl, it has been quite some time since she has said boo here on the Mansion. Much has happened since the last post:

The Gathering in November where this girl finally got to meet so many she had gotten to know during the year. A wonderful time of celebration of the Female Dominant and fellowship.

Since moving to Mistress' home, this girl has entered beauty school to complete the second thousand hours or training as required by the state board of cosmetologists and barbers here. Thanksgiving and Christmas were both very special times for this girl, and the feeling of belonging was overwhelming. The new year has begun with this girl spending new years eve with Mistress and riki to watch the ball drop.

This life has not become any easier. If anything it becomes increasingly more difficult as time goes. The tendancy to regress or overlook simple things has seemed to plague this girl on several occasions. The reminders by Mistress are emotionally painful. Just acknowledging failure is difficult on its own, but far worse when it is coupled with Mistresses disappointment. As a slave, this girl has grown tremendously over the few months she has been in residence here. This girl would not trade her life for the world and absolutely adores her Mistress and riki too. The dream continues and this girl progresses further into womanhood.

On the transition front. WOW an incredible transformation has occurred along the way. This girl is now being seen by the woman's health clinic at the hospital. On monday, her first mammogram, not seen as a right of passage, but just further evidence of the pace of the transition. The medical team that has been assembled around her is second to none. The nurse practitioner who runs the woman's health clinic has a sister who is transgendered. The name change will be applied for on the 25th of July, one year after her arrival here. So much continues to occur...

This girls education continues on as well. she is now enrolled in an associates degree program at the local community college for hospitality and tourism with an emphasis on spa management that will keep her in school until the end of next summer. It never ceases to amaze her how far she has come and how much she has grown in the last year.

O/our one year anniversary of sorts is coming soon. What an incredible year it has been and the future looks even brighter. So many of Y/you have been a very big part of this first year and this girl thanks all of Y/you...

This girl would be remiss if she did not thank the one who has made it all possible. Mistress Rob is truly a Goddess who has given this girl life. Rarely a moment passes without Her being thought of. She is the one who this girl has lovingly and faithfully served since our introduction last Febuary. Thank You Mistress for all You have done and continue to do...

submissively

Mistress Rob's slave

cynthia

 

Nearly three months since an update. This is a very significant week as it marks the one year anniversary of first meeting Mistress Rob and riki. It has been a very eventful year and so hard to believe that this girl sits here a year later living the life that seems like a far-fetched dream. It has trully been an incredible time of growth and each day is a bleesing to wake in the home of the very Goddess who has given such joy. Many happy memories and some disappointments along the way, but through it all, the determination and drive are still here. This life is not the fantasy that most envision, but it is a privilige to be allowed to serve such a worthy couple on a daily basis.

Just two more weeks remain before finally finishing cosmetology school for a second time and a little over three weeks until testing for the license. It has been a long and often times frustrating journey, but keeping in mind why this girl was enduring a second 1000 hours of school in the first place has helped to keep things in perspective. It was a concession that this girl had to make for the opportunity to serve. Sometimes a distraction, but Mistress is very good at bringing the focus back where it belongs.

To another year...

Thank You so much Mistress.

submissively

Your slave