How real is your chastity experience

I have been exploring self locking for a year testing out cages and making sure I don’t injure myself.

I desire my sexual releases, needs to be controlled by my wife. She’s likes that idea to, but not the cage. In order to keep things mixed up, I’m going try my first 5 days locked starting on Monday and unlock for two days (weekend).

I have a fingerprint lock, which she agreed to use for the main key and a timer lock for the emergency key.

Mems lie fantasy’s verse real life and ever relationship is different

 

Well, "real" would mean something different for different people don't you think? For example for us it was a thing to play with now and then, with me topping from the bottom quite often. But now things have changed and it's become very real. For the first time ever she's the real dominant and oh boy does she like it. In the past she's been kinda soft and willing to go with my suggestions, resulting in a frustrating experience with both. Now (literally since Wednesday two weeks ago) things have taken a turn. I have no access to keys, I'm basically told to do all chores and responsibilities at home and for the first time ever she is enforcing me to sleep with it on (she used to unlock me every single night). She's training be to be able to go one week of continuous wear while she's is out in a business trip.

Our approach to chastity for the last 2 years was just exploration and that was our "real" back then. Now it seems much more "real" though. My wife is quite in the "gentle femdom" side of things, I would happily let her pee on my face, and perhaps even cuckold me or force me to take part in a threesome with "her bull" but she likes marriage and just being with me. She does like to dominate me and be the boss at home though, that is for sure. But chastity is consensual and we have agreed on a set of standards that we both expect.

I can of course pull out from my The Vice mini (grower, the anti pull out is worthless for me hahaha) but that would ruin the whole game and the effort I do to hold it when she's getting really mean during T&D sessions. She gives me about an orgasm per week because she wants to. Does that make it less real?

Anyway, I'm just taking

 

Like a few others, it's "real" in that I simply cannot pull out without thoroughly destroying the device. Where "real" falls short is that it is my hands that put on and remove the chastity device, unfortunately.

 

I don't think that makes it any less real. Obviously beneficial as you can feel any nips or adjustments that are needed as you put it on. Especially important if you're 24/7 and might not get out again for some time. The main thing for me is my KH affixes the padlock.

 

Yeah but it still allows me that much more control.

 

My wife tells me to lock myself in. I don't think it makes it any less real. Being submissive to your partner is not about being forced to do anything. Anytime I could just go to her and rationally explain I don't want to practice chastity anymore, for example. The reality is that we do this because we want to, that's what makes it real. It's important to not get too caught up in fantasies.

 

Chastity is very real for me. I am locked 24/7 by my barefoot goddess. She decides when I get to edge, and when I get to cum. I love being locked for her. She is protecting my virginity by keeping me caged and plugged.

 

There is no way I can pull out of mine I've tried, the only way I'm getting out is when she uses the heys

 

Do you wear a plug every day?

 

For us, chastity is pointless if it can be easily defeated. I know that’s not a very popular opinion here, but it’s just how our power dynamics work. He’d told me that he could easily pull out of the device he was in when he introduced me to chastity. We’d agreed to make a go of it, but I wanted to see it.

So I demanded to see it by making him masturbate for me. Since then, we’ve ordered several devices, and the first thing I have him do is pull out, masturbate, then go back in.

Eventually, I started numbing his penis through banding. Then I’d have him try to pull out and masturbate for me. He could never seem to be able to get enough meat in his hands to be able to satisfy himself, so for the most part, this was satisfying for me.

Frankly. numbing him every Friday is getting a bit tedious, so we’ve been seriously considering getting him pierced. After a lot of talking, I finally agreed that he should be pierced, which he did just a few days ago. Now I’ll be looking forward to secure chastity as soon as he’s healed.

Again, I know it works for others to just not pull out, but this play is senseless to me if he is making the decision to comply. In that case, it’s still up to him, and I may as well just be a JOI video. Or I should just leave the key on the counter, and ask him nicely to not unlock himself.

This is only interesting to me if I have actual power over him, especially when he doesn’t want to comply. That’s when it’s the hottest for me.

But if he hadn’t told me he could pull out, and I found out, I’d be far less likely to continue, because I’m in this for the control it offers. If he’d been humoring me to get me to play his fantasy game, I would have felt completely insulted. I’m looking for a permanent fixture in our sexual dynamic, in not looking for a toy for his games.

 

Every night before bed I insert my plug. It's impractical for me to wear one all day long, but overnight is ok

 

Madam Darling, I have to say your comment about him physically not being able to pull out completely hits the mark for me. I wouldn’t pull out, even if I could, but for it to be real for me I would like to be controlled by my partner, and not able to touch myself in any way. Effectively making me her object, to mistreat (in a caring way of course). I love the idea of her taking pleasure from my frustration!

 

It's pretty real for me. My Wife (KH) and I started MC over three years ago and I see no point in being able to get out of my cage. (I've never tried to pull out). Once my Wife (KH) locks it, it's on until she wants to play. She allows me time to clean and shave and I guess I could masturbate in this time, but I see no point. I'm allowed to get hard when my Wife (KH) wants to see and play with me hard. Otherwise, my penis is locked. Wearing a cage 24/7 is our lifestyle for now. I feel naked without a cage on, my Wife wants me caged, so I am. She always tells me I would have been wearing a cage from the day we met if she would have known sooner about them. I always wonder how that would have been, to be in your prime and not allowed to get hard and to have an orgasm when I wanted to...

 

This. When you change the dynamic from one of i know i could escape if i wanted to, to one of i know a can’t escape - you’ve completely changed the power dynamic. I haven’t yet had a cage that i didn’t think i could get out of - but with a PA I could see that not being the case.

 

I guess I got lucky the cage that I am using for me there is no escape, I have tried and tried, but only to make sure it wasn't possible.
So I guess really my wife is lucky lol.

 

And what cage is this?

 

Terrance small stainless it is in my gallery

 

some people need to get real, if a man can pull out he will, then pretend to still be chaste, A man needs to be locked up so he cant escape, it is possible but it is not cheap and if you are not interested in doing it right dont go down the road of saying He promised he would not pull out, the truth is the small head controls the big head.

 

I'm gonna bite again...But don't take it personally...

You do not speak for everyone.
I do not,
I repeat, do not!
Pull out!
Likewise, my wife does not need to tie me up to get me back in the cage she just tells me and I do it. She happily inserts the lock after play. What is more submissive than doing as your told and honouring your promises?

I take it off in the shower and clean, and sometimes it's mentally difficult to put it back without cheating, but I don't.

You need to get real dude. This ain't a pissing contest between PA and Pullouts. Both are just as valid.

"I'm more real than you because I'm attached to the cage"

Who ducking cares. All it tells a partner is that someone isn't trustworthy.

"Oh I had to get a P/A..I couldn't trust myself" Not exactly submissive.

So grow up I say, and behave yourselves. We all (99 %)chose this...Right?

Chicken and egg...you only really start to fetishise the pullout after PA. It only becomes a thing because you cannot pull out. The predicament stokes the fire of the fetish.
Those that don't want a PA, haven't fetishised that aspect of chastity, so we see it as an honour thing. Psychologically it runs just as deep for many.

95% or more of PAers probably consented to it anyway, and great if it adds a level of control and predicament and kink and arousal, but don't kid yourselves in to thinking that there's only one way to tie a turban. Trust me I asked an old Sikh guy who knew of about seven.

Happy Chastmas!

 

You are just wrong. Just because you have no self control doesn't mean others are the same. I have yet to ever try and pull out and I have no desire to try. I don't even see the point.

 

Don't know... I mean even knowing that I can pull out, without ever doing it, makes it less real. Because deep down I know it's just a game. That's why right now I'm wearing a device with glans ring - pull out is still possible but re-insertion most likely not or very difficult. That made a big difference for my enjoyment of chastity.

 

I dont want to burst anyones bubble but the truth is if you can pullout and put it back again, then it is you that is in control not your keyholder, why in this situation even bother with a lock,
Why dont governments give convicts the key to the prison cell as long as they promise not to unlock the door ?
What you are talking about is self control and in a secure chastity situation you should have no control, tell me where and why you think I have got it wrong, the idea of chastity is you have no choice but to remain chaste and not just because you made a promise, when something is locked it is because no one is meant to get access but the person that has the key otherwise why bother locking anything.

 

Yes chastity is a game my wife and I play willingly. However, a big part of the game is that she KNOWS that once locked up I can't get out without her consent. Even more importantly I realize that I can't sneak out and back in again if I get desperate.

Put me in the make it escape proof camp.

 

Governments do. It is called an open prison. Don't get me wrong, if my wife told me she wanted me in a secure facility then I would probably agree, but as I haven't tried to escape from open prison, and I'm happy to serve my sentence out of respect for an authority I recognise as above me under those conditions, who is to say my sentence is not "real". If I broke that trust then she would know anyway. She would notice the drop in my level of arousal and mood and be on me in a flash.

The whole point of real chastity is to remain chaste...How and if you want to do it is your choice.

Those that remain chaste, despite having access to the key or being able to pull out, are just as real as anyone else.

All you're really telling me is you have no willpower. Something to be proud of? I don't think! You aren't bursting bubbles, just losing arguments.

 

It's going to vary from guy to guy. Many of us have PMO addictions from years of viewing porn and pleasuring ourselves. Like a drug addict, self control is a problem when the urge strikes. For us, security is more important. Others, who don't have that addictive behavior wired in or have successfully recovered and have built new healthy behaviors to replace the old, can win the battle and control themselves.