Just a little history. I have liked the idea of chastity long before I met my wife (thanks Altairboy). Married about 10 years before I was brave enough to buy a cage and show her. Since then I have been self locking and tried 4 other cages. The one I currently have I have used for about 3-4 years exclusively. Normally I would self lock the tie myself up in bondage while my wife was gone. Then she would come home and find me tied up and decide when to untie me and if she would leave me locked or unlock me. Since then it has been more of me just locking and giving her the keys. Then she would keep me locked for a relatively short time (a week or so) then unlock me. She seemed ok holding the key for me. Anyway it seemed to slowly build where she was either more interested in it for her, or she was more willing to do it for me. So the last time I self locked and gave her the key was Nov 2nd. I also asked that she would keep me locked until Christmas, then she could extend it if she wanted to New Year, When we get back from seeing family in Jan, or maybe even Feb. She seemed ok with that although she obviously didn't tell me what she was thinking or planning for unlocking me. However we were going to fly to see her family for thanksgiving. She had me unlock that morning for a deep clean but told me to lock it back up as soon as we got through TSA. Then when we got to the families house and were getting ready for bed we noticed that it was very visible in the PJs I brought to wear. She told me to unlock because of that and that the little boys are still young and like to rough house with "uncle" and climb over him etc. But she said when we get home on XX day you need to lock back up and give me the key. That was a first, her telling me when to lock up! Since then she has allowed me to give her several orgasms, not every day but every 2-3 days when we are home. If she decides she wants PIV it is always after I bring her to an orgasm. Then she will unlock me, we will enjoy sex and she will tell me to shower and lock back up again right after I finish in her. She has also been better about mentioning the cage in passing, or groping it when we hug or she walks by. I had a small issue that I had to go to the ER for. I asked her if she wanted me to unlock for that and she said yes. So I did, went and got myself taken care of and shortly after coming home locked back up and gave her the key. I still had some bleeding from the cut they had to make and she said that if I want to take the cage off because of this I can. I told her tanks for thinking of it but it doesn't bother me as the issues were on a different part of my body. Early on in chastity she told me if I am getting a soreness that I need to tell her. Well this happened around Jan 9th We were about to drive for 9 hours home from other family we visited where I have been locked the whole time. She then said to unlock and after seeing it decided to leave it off for a few days. I had a work trip coming up but that morning she wanted an orgasm again. I was still unlocked so I was sure that we would have PIV after I got her to orgasm. As she was recovering from her orgasm she toyed with my dick and said maybe husband will get one when he comes home, that will give him something to look forward to. Then we both took a shower. When I cam out of the shower she looked at it my sore spot and saw it was mostly healed. She said that I need to lock back up as soon as I get to the hotel. So I am not sure if she is actually starting to enjoy this, or if she is just doing it for me. I guess we will see how long she ultimately leaves me locked. And once we take a break if she asks me to lock up before I do it on my own. Thanks for reading this long ;-)
Sounds like things are going great let it take its natural course, if she does allow you to orgasm id take the initiative and lock back up straight after.... Like a few miniutes after. If not youll think bugger it ill have a night of freedom which will turn into a few nights or a week then the urge to lockup will come again but your wife will have possibly thought 'the game' was over and you might be back to where you were at the start. If that makes sense
I second this. The last thing you will want to do after a good orgasm is lock back up but just do it.
I think it sounds like she is having fun with you. At some point, those keys may disappear. Then you will know for certain. Being locked is very different when she chooses to be in control, and wants it that way!
Thanks for the thoughts. I have no problem locking up right after. And the few times we have had actual sex since I have been locked she had me do that. But there is an end date in her mind. When that comes it will be a bondage and sex scene. After that (which was discussed as the end of this round of chastity) I don’t want to push her on it more. Ideally sometime later but not too long a month at the most, I would like her to tell me to lock back up. Before I get the urge and self lock before that. Then I feel like that will tell me she actually wants me locked she isn’t just playing around for my sake
@Bound4life a lot of your story sounds similar to mine - especially the part about tying yourself up for your wife to find you when you get home When we started chastity 5 years ago, my wife did it because I asked her to indulge me. That grew over time, and the more she kept me locked up the more she started to like the way I treated her. After about a year, we went on vacation, I got unlocked for vacation sex and the cage stayed off. It also stayed off after we got home. A few weeks passed and we were flirting or something and she made a comment about me not being able to do anything because my dick was in a cage. I said it wasn't! She hasn't told me to put it back on, after all. She was surprised and somewhat annoyed. She had grown to really like me locked up. My attitude was different, expectations on her for sexual activity was different, and we were intimate more than before (even if it meant I wasn't cumming nearly as much). She told me to get back into the cage and set a rule that unless explicitly allowed out otherwise, I was to be wearing the cage 24/7 from then on. Meaning of course, it needed to go back on shortly after sex or after a doctor's appointment or travel or whatever. It's been that way ever since. This year for Christmas, she let me out for some fun after a longer-than-normal 9-week stint. Because family was staying over (and small kids visiting - same thing as you), she let me stay free to avoid any awkwardness. I did not put it back on immediately after everything was over, just wasn't feeling it ... she figured it out after a few days, was very annoyed and immediately ordered me to put it on. And now is "punishing" me ... which I assume just means an even longer stay in the cage All of that said though, in our occasional chats about the situation, she's still doing this mostly for me. She gets a ton out of it, and prefers me caged vs. not ... but if I wanted to stop, she'd be okay with it (at least she says she would be). That hasn't stopped her though from insisting on me wearing the cage! So some thoughts: (1) She may be getting to a point where she expects you caged 24/7 unless freed for specific reasons. I recommend embracing this and - like advised above - just start assuming you should be caged unless told otherwise. (2) The best way to get this is to talk with her. Try to understand if she's doing this for you or if she's growing to really like it. And keep in mind you may never get to the point where she's all-in like some people report on this site. She may always just be doing it because you asked her to. That doesn't mean she isn't enjoying it or is just going to stop.
Sounds like she’s really enjoying it to me When I truly realized my wife was really enjoying chastity it was for some reason hard for me to believe too. Not exactly sure why I felt that way but it was an amazing emotional lift when I found out how much she truly likes this! I’m happy to hear things are going so well for you guys
@ChasteCel 1 yes I am waiting for her to mention something like that if she wants 2 I have talked to her more this time since I have been locked. She has said she is keeping me locked a little because she likes it and a little for me. She hasn’t been able to tell me how much is because she likes it but at least I know she does some. @Wonderwomanssub thanks!!