Trying to Tread Lightly

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  1. Zed96
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    Zed96 Member

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    Hey everyone,

    Long time lurker first time poster.

    My chastity fetish began to fluorish last June, when I had a fantasy and realized I got off much more to my wife denying me than the traditional way.

    I started to break these fantasies to her over time, and she was slowly getting used to being dominant. In the bed room previously, I was always "on top". I think she always knew I was a bit of a sub though...given my intense foot fetish I've had my whole life.

    Finally...after many internal battles with myself I broke the news to her in March 2021 that I wanted her to put me in chastity. We are extremely busy in our lives at the moment, but I couldn't hold it in anymore. She was open, and started actively denying me, making me do chores, I became an excellent and caring husband, but no mention of the cage. She's told me multiple times how she's liking this new change. In the past our sex life was turning into "I better let him do me or else he wont think Im attracted to him". So this is all a good change. No more guilt!

    I've noticed she wants massages more, her feet done, and MUCH more oral than I ever knew she wanted.

    To be continued...
     
  2. Zed96
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    Zed96 Member

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    So come late May, I bring up the cage again. I told her I love being denied but I give in to touching myself and feel terrible after.

    She quickly responded that we should definitely buy a cage then! I was so excited, I bought one in like 30 minutes that I'd been eyeing.

    When it came, I got the delivery notification and asked her if she wanted me "locked up" when I got home...big brakes moment....she told me she didn't feel quite ready for that and she needs to do more reading. So, I told her anytime she can talk to me and ask questions, and I sent her the Lucy Fairborne book. (Remember, we are super busy) she told me she is going to make an effort to read it and take part in my interests.

    At this point, our relationship is great. For example, last night I did the dishes while she relaxed, gave her oral sex, and she allowed me to sniff her feet for a few minutes at the end of the bed (amazing).

    She started to tease me about the cage too. When I messed up she said "lock me up! He says...I'll be more attentive, he says!" Very playfully. I messed up something tiny.

    But everyone...I want to be locked SO BADLY. How do I navigate this? I have a feeling I'm going to be told to be patient. I'm already a year deep.
     
  3. CagedandPantied
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    CagedandPantied Active member

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    Keep being patient. It took quite a while for my wife to understand and grow into things as well…certainly more than a year. The best way for you to truly prove yourself as a submissive is to give her your daily devotion.
     
  4. MissyB
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    MissyB Long term member

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    It certainly sounds like you two are on track. Has she seen or played with cage? Knows how it looks and works on you? Sounds like she needs to get comfortable with that part of it. You could suggest a short lock up of a few hours while you do a chore or something for her. As a sort of demo. Just keep it light, not pressure. Good luck and enjoy.
     
  5. Zed96
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    Zed96 Member

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    She has not seen the cage...I will admit I'm a bit embarassed! I will bring up a no-pressure-no-strings-attached demo lock up session. I think she needs to see the cage is actually very comfortable for me to wear.
     
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  6. jemima
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    jemima maid for my Mistress

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    i has to tippy toe in the house in the mornings sometimes so i dont wake up Mistress.
     
  7. Guest 6019
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    Guest 6019 Long term member

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    We are 9 months in, and only just finding our feet, though the cage was on me from the start. Give her time.
     
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  8. Zed96
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    Zed96 Member

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    Well, we had a fairly long drive home from our weekend trip so I brought up the opportunity to look at and me to "demo" the cage.

    She got a little red and mentioned that she's still uncomfortable about it. Also, she begrudgingly admitted she had not gotten the chance to read any of the material I sent and genuinely felt bad...

    I still used this as an opportunity though to talk about the cage. She had a lot of typical questions like...

    "You should want to do nice things for me and be a good husband regardless! I hate that you have to be turned on to do that." I essentially explained the male libido. It's not that Im doing things *expecting* sex, its that when I am denied I want to court. Similar to any virgin relationship in the honeymoon phase. A turned on male is an attentive male!

    She also expressed it just being really kinky for her. Shes never shy'd away from things before, so I was surprised by that.

    The last concern was that she didn't want to demasculate me, she wants a strong man. I aasured her I'll always be an alpha outside the sheets and a strong family man.

    Overall she seemed to understand the answers I gave. There was more but that was the jist....good talk!
     
  9. Zed96
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    Zed96 Member

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    Essentially, she had all the typical questions anybody who has no idea what chastity is would have. I believe the Lucy Fairborne book actually answers all of them, lol..
     
  10. LesterBallard
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    LesterBallard Long term member

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    Good luck with it. All I can give is the usual advice to go slow, allow her to take her own time to get used to the idea, be supportive, don't be too pushy.

    Hope it works out for you both
     
  11. Isopropylforyou
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    Isopropylforyou Long term member

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    Have you read the book "Locked-in Live" by Key Barret?

    This explains the benefits of Chastity and how it ends the sex barter system.

    It was excellent and really opened my eyes.

    Read it together and talk along the way.

    You are both on this Journey together.

    Iso.
     
  12. MSDB321
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    MSDB321 Long term member

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    That'll be Locked in Love by Key Barrett
     
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  13. Isopropylforyou
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    Isopropylforyou Long term member

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    Sorry. Sometimes my autocorrect is just weird.
     
  14. Zed96
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    Zed96 Member

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    Well fellas, I have an update. I am locked.

    In June we finally had an argument about it. She claimed we were way too busy to focus on that right now long story short. Too many books to read, no time.

    She told me to just wear it if I want to. I told her I didn't want to do that. Life went on as normal. I dropped it completely. Things were ok. No resentments.

    Well this weekend things changed... We went out on a date I planned and she wore her favorite (and mine) heels. She wanted more drinks at dinner and I jokingly said "Well, if I spend that much money on you you're gonna have to put out!". When we got home and got in bed, she said "You can go down and sniff my feet" I said "I thought you were gonna put out? Haha" she said "...this is me putting out." So I sniffed her feet and she scrolled on her phone. Amazing.

    So Sunday comes and I forget the circumstance but I flirtingly asked if I was giving her oral tonight. She said yes. Well, fast forward to night time and she says something like "I'm gonna go shower then get ready for sex". Well, I gave her some pretty great oral apparently. Lots of foreplay, slow, I really built it up.

    After that I asked for a hand job and she said "No...and you can lock up tomorrow"
    I couldn't believe what I was hearing.
    I asked "Do you want the key?"
    "On my nightstand" she said

    She then took it to another step and said "you can lie down by my feet and kiss them but no touching yourself" And as I was down kissing her toes, denied, she said:

    "Let's start with 4 weeks."
     
  15. Bill249017
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    Bill249017 Long term member

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    Good luck! The journey begins.
     
  16. Zed96
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    Zed96 Member

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    Welp I wore the cage all day even slept with it. For a $15 knock off holy trainer I cannot believe how comfortable it is.

    I did a whole 10000+ step day and mowed for 3 hours with no discomfort!!

    So the morning came and she saw me step out of the shower caged and looked uncomfortable. She said that's gonna cause issues and chafe me...etc. I got really embarassed and just took it off.

    I sent her a long message about it this afternoon about its benefits, why I want to wear it, and how safe it is. I also agreed to daily cleanings.

    She replied back that she totally agrees and actually finds it a little hot that me wearing the cage means I can't get release unless it's through her. Her only concern was that it's gonna take some time getting used to seeing a weird cage on her husband.

    Good news! Time will take care of that. I asked her if she wanted me back locked up and she said "yeah, you can :)" looks like she isn't taking ownership of the cage yet. She left the keys on her night stand all day.

    Slowly but surely... I've already rode it out this long. Major progress. Major.
     
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  17. Guest 6019
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    Guest 6019 Long term member

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    Take your time. The Holy Trainer is perfect for me. Been wearing one since my first week. Vasaline for the shaffing and you are good to go. I've been basically 24/7 , except for sex etc. Since October and no issues
     
  18. Zed96
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    Zed96 Member

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    Day 4 since my last release.

    When I got home my wife was a total brat to me (in a hot way) bossing me around, etc... I had never asked for this before. Is it her teasing me? Either way, I'm in.

    We went to an evening event, got home late, ate, and she got changed. She comes out into the living room to watch some TV before bed in nothing but a shirt, pink lace panties, and some nasty looking ped socks I knew she'd been wearing all day (I have a huge foot fetish). They were literally transparent from sweat.

    My first though: Oh yeah, I'm getting (or gladly giving) some tonight.

    We get to bed and she crawls in, leans over to me, and we start to kiss. I noticed the didn't grab the key from her purse. After some more kissing I ask to go down on her and she says "mmm...no...I'm tired".

    I started to panic. I eventually begged to at least take 1 sniff of her feet and she refused. "Bed time!" She said.

    In the morning, we snuggled and I told her I'm a little bit afraid of what I have created.

    She just giggled in my face and kissed me goodbye.

    Side note--I asked if I could buy a penis sleeve to have sex but stay denied and she seemed interested and said I should buy it. If she likes it, she may never have a good reason to use my penis again. Scary, but highly erotic thought.
     
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  19. Straponlover79
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    Straponlover79 Active member

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    be carefull what you wishes ;-).

    my wife took the keys since march this year (normaly i came close to 1 orgasm a day by pleasing myself) since march-21 that have been 16 orgasms and 2 in the last 1.5 month......

    sometimes i'm scared what i've created so becarefull what you wishes for.

    i can recommend this topic if she or you want to read more of the journey you started and what is possible..
    and better where comes the pleasing part from ;-).
    https://www.chastitymansion.com/forums/index.php?threads/great-vanilla-read.41549/
     
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