11 days in and feeling very tense and stressed

Being locked will naturally draw a focus to sex; you'll notice yourself more, notice women more, think more about what's not available; you have a constant stimulus to remind you. I think that for some, this is part of the attraction to wearing the cage. We can't have sex around the clock, but wearing the cage itself is sexual. Even not having sex, is sexual, when it becomes a principle facet in one's life.

When we point a weather radar at the sky, sometimes we see a reflection of moisture: a radar return. This can make visible severe weather. Sometimes, a dark area on the radar, clear of any return or image, will appear, and this lack of image is equally significant. It is a "radar shadow," formed because the moisture just this side of the shadow is attenuating or hiding what's back there. The reality is, the lack of image may be the most intense weather in the sky.

Sex, lack of sex. Both are significant. Sex is easy. Pleasure, release, relax. Lack of sex is not so easy, but may be thought of as a prolonged stimulation. It's the string around one's finger, reminding one's self of the task yet undone. It's the albatross about one's neck. It's the scarlet letter, the brand, the tease, an oversize symbolic, like a wedding ring worn elsewhere, and it does not scream lack of sex...but like the radar shadow, it's the lack that tells the bigger picture, and is in reality, sex itself.

Consider something other than the CB6000, though; there are far better products to be had.

 

I am kind of in a similar situation. I wrote something about in this thread, https://www.chastitymansion.com/forums/index.php?threads/i-want-out-or-do-i.40989/, and there are some responses that might be relevant.

My wife and I are kind of new at this also. In the past I had a cheaper cage to try it out that I only wore a few days and a couple overnights. It was a chinese metal one and start irritating me so I bought a more expensive one made from better steel and it has been quite comfortable and I don't have any skin irritation.

Previously I did 7 days, then 10 days, and now I'm on 16 (my longest period of denial). I was going crazy for a few days, but have leveled off some. Today is pretty intense, but yesterday and this weekend was pretty calm. As someone else said in the thread I linked above the craziness seems to level off after a certain period and then comes and goes.

I started out wearing my cage only when my wife was at work (I work from home) during the day. We did that for the first 7 day period. There were some times where my balls were very sore, I had to change from sitting to standing for periods to try to get comfortable. I found that the underwear I use makes a huge difference. Some help hold the cage in place and I barely notice it now. Others allow too much movement and eventually I feel like I was kicked in the balls, lol.

Now I'm wearing the cage 24/7 with the exception of some contact sports I do several times per week. Those sports are the only time I'm released. I still have not had an uncaged erection since I started this 16 days ago.

Sleeping is still rough though. I have heard that eventually your body will stop trying to have erections overnight, but I have not been that lucky yet. I hope it happens soon though. I generally have to get up 2-4 times per night to pee, because I haven't found another way to stop it. I tried flexing muscles and just waiting it out, but it hurts. I like the desperation and obsequiousness I feel from chastity so much that the pain is worth it to me. I also kinda like pain so ymmv.

My nipples are very sensitive so depending on my shirt that can be distracting. Sometimes I get butterflies in my groin area also. I too notice women more. Almost all women seem attractive at this point. I sometimes have trouble focusing on difficult subjects also, but that has become less of a problem the last 4-5 days.

Sorry for the long response. I saw your post and have had similar experiences very recently so wanted to give some details. When I was posting in that thread last week I was sure I couldn't do this long term. But.....

I am now considering asking my wife to skip my release opportunity on April 1, but I am scared lol. Lately when I ask for things I get them which is how I ended up on this 1 month denial.

So my advice is this, please don't cheat yourself. You don't have to do this forever, but you've gone 11 days so keep going. Trust your girlfriend. Communicate with her about how you are feeling (but don't nag or whine to her). Ask her what changes she sees in you and whether she likes them. Ask her what would make this experience more fun for her. Most importantly, thank her for giving you this experience and denying you.

Also read that thread because others gave me great advice there!

Remember you don't *need* to cum, you just *want* it. Good luck!

 

I would encourage you to have an honest conversation with your girlfriend about these feelings.

You may find that not only does she not care, it might even make her happy to know how much more aware you are of your desires.

If it does make her unhappy, you have an area of your submission to work on, and she can help you with that. Either way is better than wallowing in bad feelings about yourself.

Of course for this to work, you have to be ready to sublimate your desires to hers, which is not for everyone.

Also I second @HusbandX ’s great advice to find a better cage if you’re going to be locked up more than a few days at a time.

 

On the point of being ultra-aware of beautiful women, yes that is absolutely a facet of being caged. What goes with it, though, is the knowledge that you can't do anything about it, and while they are free to indulge (or not) their sexuality in any way they choose, you cannot.

On the subject of feeling tense, don't overdo it. There's no rule that says you have to go all out for long term chastity. Take it at your own pace.

good luck

 

When I am in the cage/device I only want my wife and we have been together over 30 years, I do think it is because she has the key/tool that unlocks the chastity, when I have been in a month or more I do get desperate, That is when she starts to really enjoy it.
I am in a lori 5b so escape would be difficult.

 

I think you need to keep open discussions going on with your gf. Communication is vital and certainly better than being stressed about it. My wife knows I look at sexy women and sometimes she shows me pictures and even points them out to me. She especially enjoys doing it when she knows I am extremely horny. She enjoys saying she knows it is really hot for me and there is no way you will ever get unlocked and be able to act on it. Basically do not stress about it without a conversation.

 

You will get sick of the plastic crap, it will begin to smell bad quickly, and with the plastic it is near impossible to get rid of the smell, you will sort it yourself if you are really interested.

 

It sounds like things are moving along well. Do not rush it ot worry about the lack of sleep. It will all slowly resolve itself. I think the CB is a good starting point but if being locked becomes a way of life I agree that you will want to get a stainless device. Much better for sleeping and keeping clean. I eventually worked into a custom device along with full time locking except when my wife wants sex. Enjoy the journey and see where it takes.

 

I find thinking of chastity as extended foreplay helps me cope.

She loves my cock and so I know I will be released at some point, whether tomorrow, this week, next week, in a few weeks, in a few months eek ffs. But either way; It's just extended foreplay.

 

Congratulations on making it 21 days! I bought the custom Mature Metal Jailbird about three years ago. Been locked in it almost continuously 24/7 the entire time except for sex a couple times a month. No issues with sleeping or keeping it clean. I totally understand the horny feeling but the sex after a lock up is just amazing.

 

28 days is amazing, congratulations

How have you coped with the horniness?

Have you experieced desparation or resorted to begging for release?

Sounds kind of fun. Can you elaborate on what it feels like please?

 

You forgot to add the word "yet" haha.

I'm finding pushups and cold showers give me a minute or two off thinking about how horny I am but the relief doesn't last at all, ffs.

 

Congratulations on making it 28 days! The intensity of the feelings and constant desire are incredible and the reason I have such a love/hate relationship with chastity. I hate not being able to orgasm but love being controlled and kept on the edge for so long! Enjoy the ride.

 

Congratulations on 28 days. What happens if she says another month . It has happened to me.