Angst / unmotivated

Discussion in 'Female led relationships' started by HairTrigger, Aug 7, 2020.

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  1. HairTrigger
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    HairTrigger New member

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    I guess all subs go through a phase/feelings of being demotivated.

    I myself have over the last few days.

    My question is do any of you guys have a ritual or process you do to shake the unmotivated feeling. Ive been in the lifestyle for some time so am fully aware its a temporary thing, but very interested to know other subs ways for dealing with these moments.

    Thanks
     
  2. BR_Saiph
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    BR_Saiph Self-published author

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    I find no matter what I'm going thru, if I can brave the fear of sharing my less then ideal 'perfect chaste sub' emotions with @MrsBR_Saiph , she always helps me thru them
    Sometimes a good spanking is all it takes, sometimes a good old fashioned hard classic fucking session.
    She always knows best.
     
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  3. Isopropylforyou
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    Isopropylforyou Long term member

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    Routine.

    The key is in the Routine.

    If you do not have one, create it.

    If you have one, follow it.

    There is a safety in the mindlessness of a routine. It keeps you focused and on task without needing to think about it.

    It will force you back on track even when you are not feeling it.

    Iso.
     
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  4. King Hippo
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    King Hippo Long term member

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    The expression....

    "Prepare for the worst, hope for the best."

    Does not apply to chastity. I tend to get a little "demotivated" sometimes and when I do it is from a "lack of attention". For me any attention is good attention, nothing is worse then being ignored or the feeling that you have been forgotten.

    When I start feeling this way, I tend to go above and beyond what my wife expects from me... Sometimes I think she might ignore me just so she sees me do it though.

    At the end of the day, you gotta ask yourself what is making you feel "unmotivated" and go from there.

    Cheers mate.
     
  5. MissyB
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    MissyB Long term member

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    I certainly cycle through those feelings. I would hope it would be better if you serve a Domme and key holder in person, as i don't have that luxury. I find i'm able to remain chaste but not always caged. If you focus on what's really important, to her and you, I would think that might help you make it through times when you aren't as motivated. Good luck and enjoy.
     
  6. OldLockedCuck
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    OldLockedCuck Long term member

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    I know your feeling and it does happen. Like you I know not to do anything drastic as in the end you cannot escape the lifestyle and will eventually feel the need for it again. Sometimes I find reading some of the stories here and elsewhere helpful. Best wishes.
     
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  7. LesterBallard
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    LesterBallard Long term member

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    Depends on your relationship dynamic but if you're submissive maybe act more submissively than normal. Buy her something expensive. Her pleasure will reinforce your desire for submission. Good luck.
     
  8. LockitMan
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    LockitMan Lifestyle service submissive/slave/sissy maid

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    #8 LockitMan, Aug 10, 2020
    Last edited: Aug 10, 2020
    I'm partial to a sort of mind control type of conditioning program. You write mantras and little prayers to her that you kneel and recite at set times every day. If they're well written and adhered to, they help keep the negative feelings from ever starting in the first place, and help get rid of them when they do.

    Kneeling in front of a shrine you've made to honor your Goddess six times a day helps keep the mind on track.

    The shrine is helpful by itself. A framed picture of your Mistress surrounded by candles that you light when you repeat you mantras, together with little trinkets in her honor. Like small gifts she's given you, nipple clamps, her panties, a little keychain flogger, etc, and anything that has meaning to you both.

    It's an excellent way to honor and celebrate her and your special relationship together, and to honor and signify your feelings for this wonderous Goddess who has bestowed this honor upon a mere mortal slave, of being in her presence and being allowed serve her. Never ever take that lightly.
     
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  9. BR_Saiph
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    BR_Saiph Self-published author

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    This sounds pretty serious
     
  10. PeturKitty 58
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    PeturKitty 58 Long term member

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    A little femdom on your bride's part can go a long way. For me the slightest attention good or bad can get me back on track. Could be as simple as her creating a things to do list for the day, or taking her heels off after she comes home from the office .I'm a service submissive so I'm happiest when I'm being productive and getting things accomplished. For me when the low "sub" lite starts to flicker I just need her to refill my tank.
     
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  11. madams-sissysub
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    I agree!
     
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  12. HairTrigger
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    HairTrigger New member

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    Thanks for the replies guys

    The last 2 days my low sub light has defo been flickering, but i know its just temporary. She told me recently that we wont be having sex in no uncertain terms, at dinner 45 mins or so later she told me to remind her to take her birth control pill later, (this felt incredible knowing id be reminding her to take it for someone else)

    She told me i wont be having sex but thats not to say she wont be.

    Shes out this weekend and wants me to order her outfits for both nights.

    Thanks again for the replies guys
     
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  13. LockitMan
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    LockitMan Lifestyle service submissive/slave/sissy maid

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    That's great. Now you probably should bathe and dress her for her date. While shes out having a good time you do extra chores and then lock yourself in your cage or other form of restraint until she comes home. Signifying your complete lack of freedom while she's out exercising her total abundance of freedom.
    Kneeling in your cramped little cage with nothing to do but imagine what she is doing at that same moment can help instill a feeling of helplessness and total devotion, among other useful lessons.

    Try it and tell us how it felt.
     
  14. HairTrigger
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    HairTrigger New member

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    Thanks,

    So tonight is the first of her nights out this weekend. Shes going out partying tonight, shes made me buy her a new outfit and pay for her night. Be interesting to see how it plays out this evening
     
  15. BR_Saiph
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    BR_Saiph Self-published author

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    ' low "sub" lite starts to flicker I just need her to refill my tank'

    So true.
     
  16. BR_Saiph
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    BR_Saiph Self-published author

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    Messed up my reply the first time...

    Anyway, so true.
     
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  17. HairTrigger
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    HairTrigger New member

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    Thanks guys. Think ive defo made it thru the angst stage. Shes out right now in a bar so the excitement and slight dread has me almost leaking on myself. Will be an interesting weekend i think
     
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