Why do chastity men act like it is not their choice?

It was totally my idea, but she is now fully on board with it. When we were younger we fucked 3,4,5 times a day. At least! Now, it’s more fun to service her orally and her to decide when or if I get another orgasm. Perfect if you ask me...

 

We aren’t there yet, but with my ED, it’s just adds to things. I haven’t had a full orgasm since November 2019, the wife has had more than I can count. And I am quite okay with it, and she is now all about seeing how long she can make me wait to have one again as well...

 

It's part of the fantasy isn't it. I guess we act like it in the hope that our partners will get on board and embrace it and then we no longer have to act. I

wouldn't say we are really in a chastity relationship. We haven't had sex since Saturday and I've been extra good so my wife said I could have a blowjob after my bath. I thought about pushing my luck and locking myself up, blindfolding myself and then handcuffing myself to the bed but she was already waiting in the bedroom. I said to her that it's gonna sound crazy but rather than getting a blowjob id rather give her oral sex and be teased and not cum. She laughed and said fair enough and she had a strong orgasm after some oral and piv sex, I didn't cum and then she left and I just lay there aglow afterwards.

It was great.

P.s. for anyone that saw my other posts we are now pregnant! So hopefully no more coming for me!

 

Yeah, I have tried the medication route too, but it’s now become more about how long can I go. I’m in that space that when I do, hopefully, get a full orgasm, the wait will be worth it. Like I said, we fucked all the time, everywhere, so she laughs now and says we wore my cock out.. lol

 

Lol, pretty much the same scenario here... she wants an orgasm, either I give it to her, or watch her have it... either way, none for me... good times

 

I think the best analogy is taking rollercoaster rides, which you simultaneously enjoy and dislike, and having your partner pick the rides.

 

Of course we have a choice! Chastity was my idea to start with! Over the years it has evolved and I am kept locked 24-7 and as close to 365 as possible! We are at a point now where Mrs Chaste doesn't like me being unlocked so I'm kept locked! Of course I do have a choice, but the fun would be ruined!

 

It's definitely all my idea!

But the whole fun of the idea is the illusion you have no choice.

The mind can be the most erogenous part of us, if you let it....

 

It was my idea in the beginning but shes fully on board now...we am 50 and my wife is 42 so when we first started about 6years ago she thought it was the weirdest thing..now she wonders why she never tried it earlier in life

 

Well, she started it with tease and denial. And then more denial. It wasn’t a big leap to full time chastity and control. I used to like my orgasms. Now she likes hers.

 

It's gotta be. On the other hand if I had a partner and she wasn't getting any enjoyment out of it I would at that point not bother bringing it up anymore. But if she did, full steam ahead. I wouldn't argue.

 

Chastity was my madams idea, but I agreed to it, it’s not like she forced me to put a cage on.

 

Regardless of the real life aspects, when it comes to the fantasy, the greatest angst for me is stories/themes of 'forced' chastity.
Lol, I know 'forced'...!

 

Because it's part of the fantasy.

 

Possibly there is also a disconnect between the fantasy element and the reality.

Its one thing to build up a picture in your mind about having your orgasms controlled / denied, denied access to your penis for any form of gratification or any other element of chastity / FLR lifestyle and you may even think you know what to expect, but until it actually happens, then you can't possibly know how you will react.

I think too that there is the fantasy that your wife / partner / keyholder will go from possibly a low (no) libido with minimal interaction with your penis to this sex starved beast that can't get enough of teasing you in the cage whilst getting their fill of sexual satisfaction on a regular basis. Sometimes this may occur, but I would guess it is more often a subtle shift (at least initially) and they may just settle into "life as normal" for the most part, leaving the locked up member feeling just as unloved / uninvolved as before.

The reality for me of having my penis in a cage 24/7 is that there are times where its uncomfortable, ring burn wakes me up more than I'd like (and certainly more than Mrs Sen would like), and sometimes there is an itch that you just can't scratch (a literal itch). The lack of orgasm so far hasn't been too much of an issue, but Ive only done 15 days once and 7 is the norm, no doubt I'll change my tune if/when the lock up / denial goes beyond that sort of period.

As for complaining about it?

A mix of "what have I done?" or "oops, she (he) took this further than I thought"...

 

What I’ve noticed about kinks is that as formidably as they’re named, the reality is usually at least one step down in severity than the title would suggest:

rape play: given that it’s about sex and primal play more than random vengeance and violence, it’s be more accurately called “ravishment play”.

humiliation play: when done properly, it generally doesn’t leave the bottom resentful and planning revenge against their top because it’s consensual and involved enough negotiation to determine what would get the target squirming. I consider it more “blush play”.

chastity: given how much sex okay tends to happen amongst the people who report engaging in it here, this is a fascinating definition of being “chaste”. It’s more like “Orgasm management, possibly with hardware.” There’s a history of women being forced into some form of chastity for a period of time, so the idea of being reversed-ravaged, being “forced” into chastity, feeds into the power dynamic of the play ... no matter who initially broached the subject,

But the more specific terms aren’t as quick and snappy, and sure as heck aren’t as edgy sounding.

 

There are a number of quotes in BDSM 101 (I forget the author's name...Jay something) from people he encountered. One was a female "slave" who pressed for details about consent. She stated "I have no choice. He decides everything. I have to do whatever he says." Jay asked "what if he said 'no more kink, it's missionary once a month from now on '" She thought for a second, and said "I'd leave him."

 

I asked my Wife(KH) if she would be interested in MC. I showed her what the cage was and how it worked. She did some research on MC and told me to order a cage. As soon as my cock was in the cage a she had control of my sex life, she was all in. She has told me many times that she wishes we would have started earlier in our relationship. It was my idea, but she is in charge now...And we wouldn't have it any other way...

 

Jay Wiseman