Have you wanted to be a female?

Discussion in 'Chastity and orgasm denial' started by stevie stevens, May 21, 2020.

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  1. Ak Geena
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    Ak Geena Active member

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    Makes sense.
     
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  2. Lisa43
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    I have cross dressed all of my life. When I was younger I wanted to be a female, I wanted the freedom to dress, express my feelings, and to be taken by a stronger other. I still dress everyday and chastity for me is bondage of my desires, keeps me on the edge, makes me feel submissive, and under control. Being male has the advantage of the male sexual drive and has served me well when doing work that requires strength. So I try to live in both worlds; the first half of the day I am a sissy gurl and then I dress in drab and do the vanilla things that are required. I like the life that I am able to live however it would be nice to share it with an other like minded person.
     
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  3. Anonoman
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    I don’t know if this is the same for anybody else... but I’d like to have been female and if I had a magic wand to wave and there was no consequence to my family, friends, jobs (etc) I’d change today.
    I’m 100% heterosexual, not into cross-dressing or a sissy and also have zero issues with my male body. So that magic wand wouldn’t change ‘me’ or my sexuality, only my body.
    I’ve just re-read the above, thought about it even more and, yes, it’s defiantly true. It’s something I’ve known for a good number of years and not any kind of ‘chastised’ mind set.
     
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  4. cogman
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    cogman Long term member

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    I have thought about being a female, and the best part of that for me would be ...to be desired....ironically many women hate that in men ...that is desire for them because they are simply female. They want to be desired for everything else but being female.

    I wonder how women would cope if they were not wanted like men want women.

    Feeling undesired is a hard pill to swallow.

    id rather be desired for whatever reason even nauseam

    so yeah I have wanted to be female
     
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  5. Shepherdsflock
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    Shepherdsflock Long term member

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    @cogman as someone whose fundamental identity is female, but had male packaging, I can tell you what that was like for me. It was incredibly distressing and depressing. For the longest time I could not understand why it drove me to such despair. I could not understand why being desired meant so much to me and why not being desired in the way that women are desired caused me so much depression. It wasn't even really about sexual desire. I couldn't understand why it didn't seem to bother other men the way it bothered me. I constantly questioned myself, what is wrong with me that I am like this?

    It wasn't until the last year or so that I started fitting the pieces of my past and my personality together and understanding why my youth and adulthood up until that point was so full of despair and anguish about never being desired by anyone. Sure, I was loved by my parents, my friends, and even my wife, but never desired of cherished in the way that I so badly knew I needed.

    What I came to understand, among many other things, about myself was that my personality, my sexuality, my sense of place in society was that of a female. I had always expected to be pursued, to be wanted, to be desired and when it never happened I grew to hate myself. I did not understand that women typically don't pursue men or express strong desire for them, and being raised to believe I was a man made me doubt and hate everything about myself because what I knew I needed romantically was never going to happen.

    I have come to terms with my past now. I no longer blame the women who would not pursue me nor do I harbor bitter feelings toward myself for not understanding why it was such a terrible struggle for me. I didn't know what I didn't about myself, and neither did anyone else.

    I could write a lot more on this subject, including how all of this spilled over into the sexual side of my life, but I will keep this short.

    For a cisgender woman, who has been raised and socialized as a cisgender, hetero woman, the feeling of rejection at every turn would be devastating. Especially if they were suddenly thrust into it during adulthood after a lifetime of experience as a woman. There are exceptions, I am sure, who may not be shocked by it, but even some of the FTM trans guys I know have expressed shock at the difference in how they are viewed and treated as guys after living most of their life as a woman. There are certainly some very nasty problems in this world with misogyny, but the flip side of that rarely gets discussed.
     
  6. MissyB
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    I think that kind of real life adjustment is often overlooked when people fantasize about changing sex and gender. Being female isn't just about looking pretty, or desirable or wearing clothes that you've dreamed of. There are lost of challenges that men never face or imagine. Big things like discrimination, pay differences, and threats of violence, as well as small things like boob sweat. Committing to a change like that takes tremendous effort and desire, and I greatly admire those with courage to be their true selves.
     
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  7. anasyrma
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    anasyrma Long term member

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  8. Shepherdsflock
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    @anasyrma what that link describes is not too far removed from my own experience, except that I knew I was female, I was just stuck living as a guy. However, I also had the joy of suffering from gender dysphoria.
     
  9. cogman
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    Shepherdsflock What a valuable insight you have given. :)
     
  10. buildup
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    I wouldn't go as far as to say I feel like I am a women trapped in a male body. To be honest I'm not sure what I feel like, but ever since I was a child I wanted to have a female body. Sometimes the desire is intense and it won't go away. The desire at a minimum is always lingering in the background.
    I am also very interested in what I call feminine aesthetics. This presents itself as my deriving a lot of pleasure from looking at women's clothing, Watching and listening to very feminine forms of dancing, singing and set designs, Especially in a certain genre of music which often specialises in this. Even decorating I always use pastel colours. I don't like clinical looking designs in for example furniture as it looks too masculine to me.
     
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  11. PorkChamber
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    Same here. Countless evenings crying in high school praying to die in my sleep and be reborn a female. At 6’4” and 290 lbs, there isn’t much possibility of passing as a female now. Still feel the desperation though.
     
  12. NoloMeTangere
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    NoloMeTangere Long term member

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    Hey shepherdsflock

    Long time no see. You make a very attractive woman BTW. How is this playing with yourcyour and more especially with your wife?

    At one point you discussed having a lesbian relationship with your wife. Is that working out?
     
  13. Shepherdsflock
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    Things are a bit tense between us.
     
  14. inhershoes
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    inhershoes Long term member

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    I love women, I love being near them, by them and learning from them. I love to dress like them, act like them but I don't want to be one
     
  15. buildup
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    buildup Long term member

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    Why don't you want to be a woman?
     
  16. tomf_22033
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    tomf_22033 Long term member

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    Me too.

    I love being a guy. But I also love gender bending and gender fuck. So it's enjoyable to crossdress and explore my feminine side, but I'm with you 100%.
     
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  17. inhershoes
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    Just don't feel the need, I love being a man but I like my softer side at times as well. I feel I have the best of both worlds
     
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  18. sk1968
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    When I was teenager I remember pushing my cock and balls under my legs and liked the way it looked. Then I saw a picture of a woman with no pubic hair (rare back then) and I wanted that for myself. Many years later I had all the hair down there removed with laser. I was called a sissy when young because I loved to clean house. I always had a hard time keeping a girlfriend because they would pickup on my fem side and they didn't like it. In my 40's I met my wife who didn't mind my crossdressing and encouraged the laser hair removal. I had lots done all over. It wasn't until then that I owned my fem side and stopped questioning myself.

    Yes I think I always wanted to be a girl but also don't mind being a fem man.
     
  19. Deleted member 109631
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    When I was younger I dreamed of being a female. Now as an adult it's more j ust a fantasy.
     
  20. Mr_anonymous
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    Mr_anonymous Long term member

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    Not even once. Only curiosity I have is what a female orgasm feels like compared to a male one. That's more genuine curiosity then ever wanting to be feminized.
     
  21. The Queens consort
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    There are times I’d like to try it, but overall I’m fine being a man. I do like the occasional home alone dress up day!
     
  22. ConSUBmation
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    I would love to know what it is like to be a woman and have sex and their clothing is so much more fun than men’s clothing. Multiple orgasms? I’m up for that. That said, I’m happy being a man and especially being submissive to my wife.
     
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  23. TangoSub
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    I would say you pretty much captured my feelings too. I think it might be interesting to be a submissive female too
     
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  24. Shepherdsflock
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    Shepherdsflock Long term member

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    It probably wouldn't live up to your expectations. I imagine that after a short while, it would just become the new normal and you wouldn't find it very exciting anymore.
     
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  25. starflyer
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    I think i,d like to be a female, thats why im a sissy
     
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