Part 3 ~ My Vanilla Break

Mistress Watchful,

Dollyanne understands the fear of flying thing as well as the insecurity thing. Despite being a million-miler frequent flyer dolly was never comfortable with flying and often had to have something like a Bailey's & Cream to get through it. Even though the statistics say flying is safer than driving, in fact, safer than most any form of transportation, (you even have a better chance of getting struck by lightening!) the fear is still there.

In dolly's case, dolly believes it was implanted in her brain at an early age when dolly saw a very graphic plane crash scene on TV that involved a student in dolly's class. (dolly turns away from things like this now.) So, if your pet charlotte has a fear of flying, it's at least a somewhat "normal" thing and is probably due to some long forgotten image like that. (If you're reading this charlotte, wear pink panties for good luck--pink panties get you through anything--and, if you can, treat yourself to a Bailey's & Cream on dolly! You WILL make it! Millions and millions of people do.)

As for sun and water, (which dolly loves, despite a tendency to burn easily), one thing to possibly consider to make things interesting for charlotte is to make it a somewhat kinky experience for her. Bring along those pretty pink flip-flops, a two-piece girl's swim suit (who knows, if there's a private area, charlotte can begin working on sissy tanlines!), and of course, only panties to wear--no male underwear! These are a few things that would certainly make a trip like that interesting for dolly!

The insecurity thing is something we all probably struggle with, no matter what accomplishments we have. Dolly brought home a straight A report card once with one A- and got the comment, "What happened with this? Are you slacking off?"

One insensitive comment can affect a person for much of their life. Dolly had friend who secretly overheard a music teacher say to his parents, "I'm sorry, but Johnny is just not musically inclined." Little Johnny went through most of his life believing that he had no musical talent. After all, an authority figure said so! It was only when he was an adult that he took up playing the piano and became quite accomplished at it! Quite simply, the music teacher was full of it!

So, the bottom line: Take the holiday, have a great time, stay kinky, and have some Bailey's & Cream!!

Curtsey & Huggs,
dollyanne

 

Well there is always professional help (counslers)... as if you have time with everything in your life!

Another resource is to find a BDSM group in your area (or at least close enough that you can travel there once or twice a month. Being with like-minded kinky people has really changed My Goddess dramatically and i am sure it would benefit you immensely, especially if that group is dedicated to teaching about the lifestyle and offers monthly mini-classes as ours does.

Being from the states and never having been to the "old country" i have no idea on your perception of distances (or indeed how large the UK really is), but we regularly (2-4 times a month) travel 1 1/2 -2 hours to be around our kinky friends and consider the travel time to be good quality time as well. I know that many folks in other countries just don't have the same perception of distance that we yanks do... the U.S. is so large that most of us think nothing of jumping in the car and heading out for a 4-6 hour drive (well, with gas prices that is changing due to finances).

Well i guess that is enough rambling.. take care ad enjoy that holiday!

 

Dear Mistress Watchful,

I want to break character for a minute and tell you something which I am sure is evident to every warm bolded male and I am sure all your fellow mistresses here

You are an extremely attractive and beautiful woman, you exude self confidence, intelligence and a mischievous glint which men find irresistible,

The prick who would not sleep with you as you were "fat and unattractive" is an idiot not worth worrying about and I would place a handsome wager his is regretting his attitude more with each passing minute.

As for your feeling that you "must be reasonably attractive and fairly intelligent" woman there is no chance in hell that if I or any other man in her were single we would not try hit on you, given 99% me included would probably go down in flames does not diminish the effect you have.

I love women, all women and each has something special that makes her attractive, in your case you have much more than that little something, you are a prize that many men can only dream of.

Each time I see your avatar my and I am sure all here, heart skips a little beat.

You are amazing, you are very intelligent and have power beyond what you give yourself credit for, is this not a real realm all of your doing, where we can all be who we really wish we could? Not a small achievement by any measure!

It is always difficult to measure one's self, but the old adage is true you can measure a person by his or her friends, so in your case not only do many measure up very well but they all hold you only in the highest esteem.

Quite something in this day and age!

enough of my ramblings,

and please don’t ban me for this outburst, I just feel that although you feel low now you have to step back and look at who you are and what you have achieved, you say your pet has ALWAYS idolized you, I am sure this will always be true ,

Be you, the strong incredibly attractive intelligent irresistible you!

You are our leader, our Mistress!

Love Alice

again sorry to speak out of character, I am sure my mistress will forgive me in this instance:angel:

 

I have to agree with aliceinlace has said, great post .

 

Mistress Watchful, please don't worry about the Chastity Mansion while your gone. You have a very solid core of members who will put up with whatever comes along while you all are away, and we'll be here when you get back. If you have 'net access at your destination then pop in and give us an update.

Otherwise, no 'net, no worry, be hoppy !! ya mon.

I've wanted to jump in and pass along my thoughts on your struggles for quite a long while, but because there are so many great members here, someone always posts some, most or all of what I had to say, before I can, and often better than I could have. Which works out pretty good, because it's much easier on my typing finger that way.

However....the advice you've received regarding a counselor is sound. A good counselor, within a couple of visits, can offer a few simple techniques to help you work around the issues that muddle your perception of yourself and your place in the lives of those you cherish the most. While you're probably right in assuming your childhood experiences are a catalyst, identifying probable causes and recognizing the effects are not enough. You need to discuss your findings with someone who is qualified to help. Besides, you have entirely too much going on to sort those things out yourself. Just don't fall into the trap of believing you can heal yourself. Trust me, it doesn't work.

Please tell Pet that he is in our thoughts, as you are, and that we all want the best for both of you.

You can't have a relaxing vacation unless you try to relax the day or two before you leave. So, don't worry about us, we'll be fine.
Pack, then chill. Repeat as necessary.

Kinkish1

 

Excellent advice Kinkish1. Well said, let's hope that awesome lady takes some if it and enjoys the holiday.

 

Welcome back Mistress Watchful

Everything seem to run smoothly around here although maybe a little slow.

Maybe once the holiday's are over things will pick up a little.

I hope you and pet got some well deserved R&R.

 

Welcome back, Mistress Watchful! i can't wait to hear of Your vacation (You sound refreshed which is a good thing).

 

Sounds like you had a really good time. I always thought holidays abroad could be quite stressful but it sounds like you really let your hair down. Glad to hear you managed to relax and have a good time.

Does your new found dominance mean there will be a return to your old diary? Maybe a break was just what you and pet needed in order to put things in perspective.
Will we be hearing from pet soon? I sure hope so.

Glad your back. Things didn’t seem quite the same without you.

 

Perhapes some sort of Alarm Clock that is wired to Pets nether regions?
Ok, trying to get into the right spirit here and probably failing.
Plus that might work the first time but... I don't imagine him sleeping well after that...

 

Another spooky event that reminds me of how like you two me and kris are, except its normally me that forgets to shave (dont think Kris would be a convincing sissy if he didnt ha!) :tongue:

It's like the past few weeks with me and kris, hes been all down and unable to serve because of his leg/foot injury, This pretty much resulted in me being a complete tw*t with him, I was getting angry, frustrated and moody.

It's a horrible situation to be in, being in limbo not knowing which way to turn, you could grab the bull by the horns (or pet by the balls if you prefer) :tongue: and see what happens, I found that did work with Kris as it made him realise how much i want things and it made him see how much he missed it.

I hope things get better soon.

 

You and pet do seem very similar to Master and I. I’m rubbish at getting up in the mornings, I’m lucky though Master usually makes me coffee to get up me. Have you or Pet considered that he may have some kind of sleep disorder? I’m starting to thin along those lines for myself. I find it really hard to get up in the morning but it feels more than a mental thing I feel like I physically can’t get up, it can be quite hard for me.
It can be hard for people to understand why I can’t get up branding me lazy but I feel like it’s more than laziness. I could be wrong about pet it just made me think after reading your diary.

I hope you can both work through this. I know when things look bleak it seems as if it will never end. I guess it comes down to the old communication and being there for each other. I know for you talking is hard with the kids around but term starts again in a couple of weeks.

 

Yes, that would have been a much better way to go... maybe it should be a morning routine?

As far as pet's depression... i suffer from it as well and we have in fact addressed it in our D/s contract. Perhaps You can gleam some ideas from it? i know when i am depressed i tend to push people away and try to lash out at them. i have told Goddess this and asked Her to call me on it should it happen and realize that it is a symptom of the disease and that what i need at that point is for Her to force me to behave. It might be volatile when She does this, but it really is for the best and as long as She realizes it is not personal we are all good (hopefully).

 

On sleep issues I have a couple of ideas. Have you had your SOs DHEA levels checked? Low levels can mess up sleep. Also a small amount of Melatonin before bed (and the DHEA if needed) can help many (most?) people with sleep issues. *Note I'm not a doctor just a messed up patient who reads too much...

Depression can be hormone related. You might want to bring Pet to the doctors and have his Thyroid and Testosterone levels checked in a hormone panel.

 

I'll free my diary! :tongue:

 

Damn Kris staying logged in!! :sex020: That last post was supposed to be me! I'll Be the one freeing my diary!

 

Oohh sounds like fun to me. Master can free his diary :tongue:.