Fetishes in in stressful times

For me it really hasn't changed in that respect, although I was considering asking mistress if she would rather me be uncaged in these stressful times. On thinking about it I decided to keep quiet as she will decide if that is the case.

I have a feeling her answer would be, why would that help??

I think for a man it may become more important because at least for me these things ARE a stress relief, I wonder if this is true for the fairer sex. I suspect tonight I might be paddled a bit harder than usual as its been a while. I am not sure if that will be a stress reliever for mistress or not but I have a feeling the cage wont be coming off.

 

I think it's akin to: "Keep calm and carry on."

Routines are comforting. If we keep carrying on with how we do things normally, we can use that to ground ourselves and have a sense of normalcy against the madness of what is going on in the outside world.

 

For myself, my Wife/KH left that up to me. Since I work at an essential business I am around the general public daily. I stay locked out of respect to her, but she has given me a key to unlock if I am in a situation that could be stressful. At home though locked.

 

I've found that both of our libidos have nose dived with the current stresses.

 

Due to me being off of work now until this virus mess has passed, this lifestyle will offer me activities to help time go by. But more importantly, help me strengthen my skills and mindset as a Domme. (I call my sub "sir" not as a title, but out of respect for him as a person.) sir saw a side of me last night that took over. Let's just say being confined in our home allowed him to be even more restricted last night...tightly! While I was pleasured, he sat there in agony, left to be ruined. Ah, the satisfaction of destroying pleasure with pain. Mmmm.... Then, lights out until he couldn't take it anymore and offered to sleep in his spiked device. More pleasure for myself knowing that just a slight touch and movement would tantalize him sending sir into a sub space of his own. The mind f*** that I own him and have the upper hand all while knowing he was in his own little world enjoying his own mental aspect of this lifestyle.

 

Well my Goddess has already answered this but as for me, I too find the lifestyle a great escape from the stressors of this world. However, I would be lying if I said they don't kill my drive some. Her taking control helps keep my mind in a much better place.

Her account of last night does little justice of how crazy She made me. Frustration is an understatement.

 

More important to me, live every day as if its your last

 

These particular circumstances aren't directly affecting me enough to mess with my kinky side. Quite the opposite actually... spending more time at home is an opportunity to indulge and explore even more!

Normally, however, I don't have any interest in sex or kink when I get stressed about work or life in general. The nice thing about chastity, though, is that it really doesn't require a kinky frame of mind. I probably don't even think about my cage 90% of the day anyway, let alone when times are stressful.

So no matter what the issue is, the cage just stays on.

 

I just asked this very question tonight over a glass of wine. Her response was, "You will remain locked up." She said we will discuss it further on Thursday.

Tonight she gets a full hot oil massage in front of the fireplace.

I don't think things will change much. I am trying to do everything I can to reduce stress for her. Continuing, helps reduce stress for me as well. I do need to learn how to do manicures since that establishment is now closed.

Good question.

 

Oh, I remember the days of having a fireplace to lay in front of and my sub served me well. Mmmm....

 

Fetishes are pretty deeply buried right now. Our daughter is with us 24/7; and my top priorities are keeping my family healthy, nutritiously fed, and my domestic duties. The later being a little harder to keep up with when the house is at max capacity 24/7.

 

We live seperate and both have kids locked down with us. She is a nurse, further quaranteened and waiting on test results for the virus while still recovering from a life threatening incident.

Chastity should be the absolute furthest thing from my mind, but i just topped 3 months locked and counting (personal best) and she had me deliver her meds today just to be sure the cage was still working. You never saw someone smile so big. Now I'm horny, worried, confused and basicly don't know how to answer your question.

 

Fetishes....oh yeah! I almost forgot about those.

I think it depends on the degree of stress. Right now my stress level are through the roof. At this time I’m lucky to eat, drink, and sleep. On the other hand, I’m the past I would have found a few minutes to wank off. (Perhaps more than once during a day.) That would have led to me paying less attention to my spouse.

Now, I am very aware of how much I would prefer to be showing her my adoration instead of all of the work and associated stress. It seems even more important to keep up the good habits I have formed with her, Just making her coffee in the morning is a wonderful way for me to start each day. I look forward to it every morning.

Thanks for asking this question. It was a welcomed opportunity for me to check in with myself and to realize how far I have come in being a better husband for my wife.

 

We're just continuing on as normal, the kids are with their bio mom and we're together having a honeymoon of sorts. We're having a lot of fun being together this long, even though we've both been pretty ill the past two weeks.

 

fetishes, fantasies, are our escape from the real world.
and when the real world turns out crazy, we need our fetishes and fantasies as a refuge.

 

I'm finding they help - gives the mind somewhere to wander away from the realities surrounding us. In such times, I actually believe having some kinks can help some folk with their mental well being!

 

Because my office has almost everyone working from home, I couldn't help myself and jerked off in the bathroom a few times for stress relief. My wife noticed and told me how much she dislikes me when I am not chaste. She would never let me wear the cage out of the house, but I convinced her that I am weak and need to wear it 24/7. She agreed on a trial basis during this crisis.
She doesn't like the cage, but she has come a long way in the past two years. I love her so much and want to be the man she knows I can be.

 

From time to time think English is a funny language - but it has a very positive advantage: You can easily distinguish kinks from fetishes. That said, I definitely consider my sexual preferences more as kink than fetish.

But back to topic: I can handleproblems as well as stress quite well and would not run from problems even if I thought that sex would be a way to achieve it. In contrast I would rather say that the more stressed you are the less sex you would want - at least that is the way with us when there are really serious problems.
And while I see Covid as a serious problem apert from the lockdown it does not much change for us and our family at the moment. Our family is well, our parents are cared for, you can still buy essentials (even if you might not always get the brands you are used to - so what ?) you can still do sports ourdoors alone or with members of your household, our work is still going on - even if it is homeoffice...so we do not see the changes to us as a major problem we would have to worry about all the time. But even if it yould be somewhat worse - what good would it bring to worry all the time ? Prepare yourself as good as possible ad go on with you life as best as you can in this situation.

Due to the lockdown we are currently spending more time together than usual. So you could say that even the lockdown has some positive effects

 

Interesting question and reply’s! Taking care of family, stay healthy and keep running our businesses causing bunches of stress these days. On the other hand, working from home and be more together whilst “storming outside”, also increases the value of being together as well our intimacy. My Love does not have a strict 24/7 policy to keep me locked. However, since a week she does, as she noticed it makes me calmer and more “resistant” during stormy weather. So, also here, chastity / kink works as a perfect natural medicine to handle psychological disturbances.

 

. . . and one day you'll be right !

 

From many years of experience I know that the more stressed I get the kinkier I get and, if you like the more extreme my fantasies get. I'd always assumed that this was simply 'normal' and it's come as something of a surprise to learn that this obviously isn't the case for everyone.
I would agree that being locked is de-stressing in the sense that you are handing over power and control to your KH but also that it takes away any fears about 'performance pressure' . . . you will only perform when and if you allowed / commanded !

 

I could definitely see fetish’s getting put to the side, mostly because that stuff is hard to focus on in difficult times. Loss of job, illness, family problems, kids, those are all issues that tend to squeeze couples, and this is all of those combined plus some more.

As far as chastity, it’s not always a kink. My cage is just on, no sexy anything. I wear the cage, it comes off when she wants it off, no kink needed. When my wife lost her mother, I’m sure sexual stuff was the last thing on her mind. It didn’t mean the cage came off, it just meant I would stay caged until it felt right to be sexual again.

 

Exactly. The kids where at our place when the "stay at home" policy started. But my ex demanded the kids, so now they can't leave her place.
My company has decided that we work from home for the next weeks/months. Which saves a lot of time driving to and from work and as such we have more time together which is heaven on earth.
We only have to deal with a jealous cat who prefers to sleep in between us. Which is cosy, but he wakes up at 5:00 AM loud meowing until my love is awake, so he is no longer allowed in the bedroom.

 

So then a follow up question should stress relief masturbation be allowed?