Looking for my Cybelian wife

I think you need to try a bit harder than that!

 

I suspect that the reality may not live up to the fantasy.

 

I haven't heard of the term 'Cybelian' before.
Having googled and found this link: http://cybelians.moonfruit.com/cybelian-lifestyle/4546725177

I do think that perhaps the reality may not be as good in practice as the fantasy.

My partner as an example yearns to be wholly submissive to me, he fantasies about it and is often acting on it. However, if I request or act in a dominant manner outside of his dream/fantasy- he isn't as open to it.

As was recommended to me many months ago on here (and rightly so!), start slowing at the bottom. It'll take time to reach that point with someone (if ever).

'Slowly slowly catchy monkey'. Good luck

 

Hey my friend. No intention at all to rain on your parade. If you think you have a chance of finding a woman who will become your Cybelian wife, then I wish you every success.

As a submissive man, I find the prospect that a Cybelian Society once existed a fascinating historical subject and I have carried out some very brief research into that possibility. I do not consider myself to be an expert by any stretch of the imagination and I am very happy to bow to your superior knowledge, if that is what you have.

I have to say that a Cybelian Marriage would be way too extreme for me personally, but whatever floats your boat and all that. There is no real evidence to prove that a Cybelian Society ever existed. For those that don't know, the theory/myth/fantasy of Cybelianism is that a man marrying a woman, would immediately become completely enslaved to her and dedicated to serving her in any way she required. There are some artefacts that have been found, dating to around 800BC, depicting a chair-based device that a wife could sit on, allowing her urine to flow down directly to her husband laying under the chair, forcing him to consume her urine. The theory being that her urine was good for his overall health and kept him in good shape to continue to serve her.

More likely, in my opinion, is that Queen or Empress Cybele had male slaves that were subjected to the most appalling and extreme abuse. Far less likely, again in my opinion, is that there was a society where all husbands were enslaved by their wives.

I am aware of the possible existence of a modern Cybelian Organisation (http://cybelians.moonfruit.com/#), similar to a religious cult, however, I don't know how large or small this is in reality, or even if it actually exists at all. My feeling is that most modern societies would consider this lifestyle to be abuse of a male victim who is himself suffering from Stockholm Syndrome and, therefore, unlikely to be mentally capable of defending himself.

@Tim Bradshaw, if you think you have a realistic chance of finding a woman prepared to risk prosecution and a lengthy jail sentence in order to fulfil your fantasy, then good luck to you. Who am I to say that it can't be done? What I would say again though, is that the reality of this lifestyle may not live up to your fantasy.

 

Hmm. Why would someone want to live with a person or or thing that they hate, let alone legally bind themselves to them / it? That seems pretty counter-intuitive to what I hoped being a grown-up would entail.

A guy once tried to tell me that the fact that I enjoy topping for CBT means that I hate men. I thought about it for a moment and responded, “Why would I want to touch the junk of someone I hate? EEEEWWWWWW!”

He looked shocked. I stayed confused.

 

Hey Tim. Given that all of us on CM share an interest in female domination and male submission to some extent or other, I'm sure that your true path to happiness lies in finding a loving relationship with a woman who prefers the more assertive and dominant side of things. My feeling is that if you reject anything but the full Cybelian experience, you will miss out on so much opportunity. The fact is that this full Cybelian ideal is so unlikely that you will end up a very lonely and, perhaps, embittered man. I do appreciate how seductive the extreme submission ideal is, but only a tiny minority can ever find this. Once the reality of this type of lifestyle hits home, an even tinier minority find true happiness. Why waste your life chasing the impossible fantasy dream?

In my opinion, there are lots of women out there who would love to be with a man who would allow them some freedom to be more assertive within the relationship and buck the societal norms. Wouldn't you prefer to spend your life with a loving dominant woman who will cherish you and care for you for who you are? In my experience, submission is a progressive thing, with limits being constantly stretched. Last year's limits are this year's expectations, so you eventually find your level.

A bit of a cliche, I know, but if you aim for something realistic and achievable you have a really good chance of finding it. In my opinion, the whole Cybelian thing is so unrealistic, so unachievable and would be a horrible experience in reality. I mean.....how much piss can a man drink and be happy?

 

Sorry.....forgot to say.......nobody.....absolutely nobody is worthless! Are you seriously saying that you would be happy with a woman that made you feel worthless? If so, you need to get some therapy !!

 

Money. If the guy has enough of it, he could probably find that arrangement. If not, then he's almost certainly S.O.L.

 

A fool and his money are soon parted.

 

'I want someone to come to me for no particular reason, do as I want and call it a fancy name, pretend that they are in charge whereas they will just be doing my bidding. Servitude under the name of being my goddess.'

Where do I sign??? I hope I beat the crowds of dominant women banging on your door...

You were given plenty of good advice here but if you insist on following your own path of no action and all fantasy, then good luck to you. Hope you beat the overwhelming odds.

Seriously, though, whether you're looking for an online fling or a serious relationship IRL posting a brief invitation to do as you say is such a minimal effort as to be no effort at all. Do you seriously think that a woman who sees herself as a goddess would come looking for you? What's in it for her other than a chance to do your bidding and receive nothing in return? Promises are empty words unless backed up by action - and so far, your action is nil. Consider being a bit less demanding and a bit more interested in the world outside your immediate sexual gratification needs. Talk to people. Show interest in THEM, not in how they can fulfil your fantasy. Then maybe someone finds you interesting enough to spend time on you.

 

For funsies, I searched this forum for the word “cybelian” and found two women who were either insistent upon or at least curious about such an arrangement. I suggest doing a similar search and posting in their respective threads.

 

This is a perfect example of the reality of Femdom intersecting with the cultural fantasy!

Speaking from experience, the same logic applies to something like pegging. It takes a connection between the Domme and sub to actually get something out of it. Then, it's absolutely amazing for both parties. But without this connection, it's just unpleasant.

 

Right there in that queue with you @Abstraction, and hoping I beat you to the front!!

.... But seriously though, a clearly generic message, completely out of the blue, advertising that you are looking for a cybelian wife, with the clear undertone that I may indeed be the chosen one, is not the way to win your future 'godessess' interest. I personally didn't pick up on an ounce of submission in the tone of your brief, straight to the point request for my time. Good luck with your search my friend, but I recommend that you have a think about the manner with which you approach contacting Dominant women.