How real is your FLR

Our FLR is real. She casually expresses her love for me with three words: I own you.

I started this D/s stuff as bedroom fantasy (because my dick gets off on female power, because women are so very beautiful to me) years and years ago, but we eventually expanded into full-time daily life, without ever expressly intending to.

I'd say some of the dirty talk, like making me do tasks, appealed to us in real life in small chunks at first and we did that. Eventually, it became more and all the time, but also with lots of stopping altogether because of giving up on it. We have kids, and life gets in the way. Still, as my wife aged, she wanted more control over me, and I am helpless to resist her because I find her dominance so fucking attractive. As I age, I find I far prefer the feeling of being owned than being a free guy.

But our FLR has always been a work in progress.

 

We have routines based around her schedule.

She goes to the gym three days a week for a 5:30am class, and arrives home at 6:30am before leaving for work at 6:55am.

On gym days I have her coffee ready next to the shower by the time she gets back from the gym, with a breakfast smoothie made with her chosen mix of coconut yoghurt, berries and spinach prepared before she leaves for work.

Non gym days are a coffee ready when she wakes up, and scrambled eggs prepared before she leaves.

Every day I make her a 1.5L water bottle with lime juice because she is really terrible at staying hydrated.

This is what she wants, I do this to please her, and staying hydrated is a focus for me.

On gym days she showers when she gets home and then sits on my face until orgasm before sending me to make the breakfast shake while she dresses.

On non gym days she occasionally sits on my face, or reclines and asks me to go down on her.

She leaves for work at 6:55am

The kids wake at 7:00am.

This is my FLR and I love it.

 

What are the elements of your relationship that are play or real?

My wife K/H totally controls our sex life. In everything else you could say we have a "normal" relationship.Since I gave her control of my orgasms and everything regarding our sex life, our sex life is 1000 percent better than it was before.

 

I was an alpha male who laughed at guys that were bossed around by their wives/girlfriend. I married a woman 25 years ago that is seriously the nicest woman I have ever met. I always (well mostly) respected her. However now she has me locked in chastity and my whole world has changed. It is in a way I dont even understand. It is only 2 weeks in She noticed the change in my behavior almost immediately. She loves the chastity now and wont let me out. I think the FLH is next. She is enjoying the attention and I have noticed her being more confident as well. Her commands are starting to become more firm and I am really enjoying it. The whole situation is causing a whole positive feedback loop in our relationship so I feel like being in a female led household is 100% inevitable. She is walking around and giving me different looking glances as she whispers to me. "I am really enjoying this." I am reading the book "Surrender, Submit, Serve Her" and I told her about it last night. Her response "I think I like that and I will read it." One of the things I realized from the book. She already is the leader. The only thing she wasnt leading previously was me. Now that is all changing. I know it is inevitable and I absolutely love it.

 

This is an interesting question that me and my Keyholder Wife have worked on.

We make our FLR "real" through a detailed schedule of tasks i need to do and punishments for missing any of the deadlines. This keeps me focused on being of service to my Mistress though making Her life easier.

I am expected to demonstrate my submission on a daily basis in private (for example, by kissing Her feet and making the bed) and in front of a select group of Her Friends. FLR feels very real when i am serving Them while They visit or showing off one of my subbie tshirts. These aren't major things on the full scale of submissive acts, but they work to make FLR "real" for us.

 

My FLR is very real, my madam is control of nearly all aspects of my life, she keeps me locked 24/7, she has control over what I do, I have to ask her permission to work extra at work, although she has never said no, mainly as she enjoys having the extra money to spend!
She has access to all my activity’s and passwords ect, and she decides what we do, and where we go.

 

I introduced chastity to my wife 16 months ago as we were on the verge of divorce after nearly 45 years. We shared a hose but little else. (Notice I didn't say 'home') Since then she has gone from my key holder to M'Lady. We have evolved into a FLM with M'Lady as my Mistress / Owner and me as her submissive husband and willing slave. As we are retired there is nothing to prevent us living this way 24/7 other than when the grand kids visit. we do tone things down around 'vanilla' friends but many of them either know about our lifestyle or at least sense that it is different.

After being the alpha both personally and professionally for most of my adult life I welcome the change and have no desire to go back the way things were.

Her day starts with me stopping what I am doing to serve her morning protein drink and then make her coffee. As soon as I place her coffee in front of her I get on my knees naked to profess my love, dedication and appreciation for her by reciting a morning mantra. I then bend down to kiss her feet working my way up her legs to lay my head on her thighs just above her knees. I remain there until she dismisses me.

 

No game here either. I'm in chastity 24/7 until she removes her security tag and hands me the key to the padlock. Her numbered security tag is what drives home our WLM. Even when I'm allowed to cum (never PIV sex) before I do cum I must ask permission. She'll usually grant it but there are times when it's no and put your belt back on. I wear panties 24/7 as she tossed out all my male undies. I wear a pantie liner to protect my panties from the cage, lock and security tags.
I do all the cleaning, 90% of the cooking and all the shopping. Unless she feels like doing any of those chores.

I have never been happier. Being controlled is what was missing in my life as i was a bit out of control. Our WLM has also allowed me to explore my sissy/cross dressing side which my wife supports. She buys all my things.

Everyone has a different story. For me, I just wish we would have done this many years ago.

 

I forgot to add that she has rules for me to follow. If I don't follow her rules I'm punished. No joke to be spanked with a leather strap and then caned and then put into bondage to think about what I did wrong and what i can do to prevent this from happening again.

 

Another good book Finding Love Through Female Domination Ms. Renee Lane

 

Mine stay a lot vanilla, and takes it as a game for most of it except in a few area where she get what she like and I loose all on this.
it is cooking for example, she stop all and I am due to cook nice meal for her.
On sex she totaly abandon all that is seen as feministe like gartner belt and all sexy stuff, she don't have anything now in her cloth and found it stupid.
now we have sex only if she requested it and I have to warm up her, makes her some pleasure. mine has became very secondary and most of the time she don't care.

On chore she still do a lot and feel guilty if she has not done it.
As she does not works she still a lot guilty instead of enjoying her power. A lot of work has to be done to complete our FLR.

But what she has gain and decided is now fully her.

 

Guessing that my Love and I do have a more FLR than we both think. Her leadership was demonstrated again clearly to me a few weeks ago, when we did a purchase for some furniture. She had already decided about what would be our choice before we entered the shop, although my Love knows that I had something different in mind. In the shop my Love let me talk for less than 1 minute and then took over and decided. A year ago, I would have started arguing with her and try to even convince her during the shop visit. Now, I’m very happy she makes the choice of her wish.

 

@Metalman it got very very real when I come and lived with Her. but I always was nice and polite when I meet Her in Spain.

 

My girlfriend and I are at the early stages, so it is still very much a play thing for us. I love to submit to her and she has been very kind in playing her part.

Most other replies so far are from 24/7 FLRs, but there seems to be a common thread in that what starts as play domination appears to invade normal life, almost by accident. Perhaps it isn't actually as accidental as it seems.

From my own limited experience, relationships of this nature are naturally progressive and what was once a line in the sand has been rubbed out and redrawn. Do some women suddenly realise their potential for having the line where it suits them, in the knowledge that their man is completely unable to resist?

BCWYWF ???

 

This is for the most part exactly as mine is. She controls all aspect of our sex life. But I will admit it drifts sometimes into our regular life. Massages, foot rubs, shopping, starting her car, she playfully reminds me how my sex life is contigent on her happiness. But a total FLR? No. Nor do I think she wants it.

 

My wife and I are still early in our FLR at
2 1/2 months. A couple ways we keep it real at this early stage are daily foot massages after I do kitchen clean up and she allows me to kiss her feet before, during and after the massage.

 

We have little moments like this as well. Her nightly showers are great. We have pre teens, so on most nights she will announce, "you got them? I'm taking a shower." At some point while they're watching TV or playing xbox, I'll knock on the bathroom door. The answer will be "come in" or "not yet." When I'm allowed to enter, I can kneel at the edge of the shower. She'll then bend over and allow me to show my subservience, as well as other things....

 

Very real, although she is a more lenient Dominant than many others claim to be on Chastity Mansion. She quite enjoys giving me maintenance spankings and will lay into me if I've been dumb enough to cross the line. She definitely is in charge but will often let me push to get my way for a while.. up until she decides she's had enough and then I get reset.

She loves keeping me locked but also loves the dick.. I think she struggles keeping me locked more than I struggle being locked sometimes. I do sleep in it, and am generally locked 24/7 except for sex and I play a sport once a week that I am temporarily unlocked for. She controls the finances even though I make the money, which is a relief although I wish she would save more and spend a little less.

We've only been at it for about 6 months, so she is growing into her role more each day. Today she ordered a set of bamboo canes with the intention of simply breaking them over my ass as needed and has me on a morning routine of making her coffee by 6:30am... I am NOT a morning person.

Sexually she enjoys good old fashion vanilla sex but also likes to literally slap me around and take me with a strap-on. She is considering letting a man from my past come fuck me in front of her. We have a complicated relationship lol, most importantly we love each other. I'm trying to be a better sub and she is trying to assert her will a little more.

She is taking me to Vegas for a FLR meeting, I'll presumably be in my sissy outfit, something I only wear every other month or so at night, she does my makeup... in Vegas she will meet other Dommes... I'm quite curious how that will play out.

 

For my wife and I, our FLR went from play to real when she took complete control of all the finances. Since she took control, everything we purchased has been in her name. Our new car is in her name only. All the bank accounts are in her name. My paycheck goes directly into her account which i have no access to. She has the only keys to our safe deposit box. She is the primary name on our credit cards. She is the only one with knowledge of the passwords and pin numbers to all our accounts.

The only money i have to my name is what i get from her as a monthly allowance, which ranges between $0 and $100 a month, depending on what she wants to give me.

She controls the finances and she controls our lives. If she wanted to, she could absolutely ruin me, and i am always aware of this fact.

 

When I first asked her to lock me I also asked for us to be in a FLR. She didn’t feel comfortable having that much control over me in the beginning even though it does just pretty start out as a game. The further along we got into chastity the more our FLR dynamic grew basically on its own as a natural progression. I noticed the real change a few years ago when she made it clear there was zero tolerance of me talking back or me making any snotty comments. What’s funny is I was never physically punished or locked up longer (at that point) for my infractions. She would just shut me down verbally putting me in my place, she wouldn’t let me get away with anything. It didn’t hurt that she knew that’s what I wanted and she used it against me, kind of reverse psychology. The FLR has evolved into me being her 24/7 servant who is obedient to her wishes and I don’t talk back. She basically conditioned me by shutting me down so consistently, giving me tasks to do while we’re in front of others and making sure she had the last word. She chose more subtle ways to mold me into what she wanted without me even realizing it. Now everything comes so natural to us both. Just more recently she incorporated physical punishments I.e whippings and longer lock up times. She has become very secure in her role as a domme, almost to natural now. She keeps me on my toes and I often wonder what direction she is leading us, she genuinely makes me nervous when she’s pissed off.

 

We have been working on our wife led marriage for 3 years and two days short of 9 months. After I asked her to consider taking the reins, she did a little research and quickly agreed a couple of days after me baring my soul to her. We just celebrated our 40th wedding anniversary. We continue to both work, her office is 4 miles from the house, I work out of the house. For us, our journey is very real.

Every week we review where we are, and where we came from. My (once) very vanilla wife now holds my key (since October 2019). She was the one who told me to buy the device of my choice so she could see how I would react to being under her thumb beyond voluntary chastity. I bought a small HT3. We worked with it for a few weeks and she really liked how my demeaner changed. She likes me locked, so it doesn't make any difference what my attitude is or was about the device. Luckily, I like the feeling of being owned that comes with being locked. It not so much that I enjoy being locked, it has a ton of issues that non-locked men don't understand , however, the submissive feelings that being locked evokes in me overrides any of the negatives. I now have an HT Nub, which is very comfortable for me in most usual daily activities.

What has changed in our lives since we agreed to live as she decides, lots.
We rarely argue, and all my passive aggressive actions toward her have ceased to exist.
I clean the house. All of it, inside and out. She has not made a bed, cleaned a toilet for over three years. By handling so much of the chores it frees her up, and me up for more outings and fun when she is not at work.
We have a weekly review session, Communication between us has never been better.
She has initiated maintenance spankings even if no punishment is needed, she feels I respond well to the sub act of placing myself in such a vulnerable position. I agree with her, I do
She has decided that my "free time" must be accounted for. So when a neighbor hollers over and asks for some help, I must ask her if I may go to help so she knows where I am.
She gives me an allowance each week, and I have a spending limit on a credit card that I must not exceed with put consultation with her.
Every day I offer her a morning "affirmation" where I pledge my surrender and submission to her, she then responds stating she loves our new live, accepts and loves me as her husband and submissive, etc, etc.
I now do 85-90% of the cooking, and meal prep.
All of her car's maintenance is my responsibility, including insuring it is full of gas.
Nearly every night she receives a foot massage from me, this has never been reciprocated.
Every day I ask what I can do for her to ease her day.
She has become more assertive, but meanness is not in her nature. I would not like if she was bitchy, I fell in love with her because she has a lot of inner strength and moral character, that has not changed.
I am happier than I have ever been in my marriage, and she says the same thing.

 

Oops, mistake in my post above. My wife has been my kh since october 2018..

 

Oh I feel so weak telling the truth to all of you real subs!
I am a “Do me” sub. I get sexually excited by being locked up, ordered about, spanked, or made to suffer as women have suffered in order for them to be beautiful. I originally suggested that she “force” me into chastity.
Things have come full circle for us. She uses FLR and all manner of femdom in order to get what she wants and needs, namely PIV SEX.
A simple phrase from her or a belt whipping or being ordered to put my nose against a coin on the wall gets me excited and engorged. as for unauthorized masturbation, I must self-regulate in order to be ready for her needs. My refraction time at 67 ain’t what it used to be.
When we first married in 1972 she loved sex and she still does. We both do our best to serve each other.
Sometimes we go through periods of greater corporal punishment and sometimes she just puts me to her breast for long suckling sessions which brings incredible closeness followed by my serving her sexually.
Thank you for reading this.
As a note to younger readers: Please know that as you age your thoughts and desires remain the same but circumstances may change.
My wife and I often chuckle to each other that young people have no idea how nasty we are.
ss

 

Ours I guess is mostly "extended play".

We're both switches and take turns in the dominate position, although when she's the dominant I like it to be more then just during sex, when I am dominant she pretty much just wants it during sex.

We kind of just keep it one way until one of us is ready to switch back to the other. Currently we're in femdom mode.