New girlfriend has a chastity kink.

It can be a lot of fun, but remember Rome was not built in a day. The idea that you can slap one of these on and just go long term is fantasy. Take regular breaks as you start and monitor your penis for developing rashes and sores. Build-up gradually. I think I was able to hit the one full week mark only after a month. Good luck.

 

I would love to hear how this conversation started! This fairly a male instigated activity, not that women don’t enjoy it, I know my wife does. Rare to see it brought up by the female.

Welcome to the mansion and hope to hear all about it!

 

My girlfriend is new to being a keyholder as well! I was the one the introduced her to chastity! She was in an abusive relationship before me and I think it really helps her realize her feminine power! Tonight for the first time she went home with both my keys and it's a whole different feeling for me to have her one hundred percent ownership! She's very busy woman so I probably won't see her for 2 or 3 days! 4 days is my record so far and she knows it and wants me to break it! I love seeing her so empowered!

 

Your Girlfriend is right you need to slowly get used to this. It takes time and you'll make mistakes along the way; but it's all part of the training process. Don't hesitate to ask for advice.

 

It's like you've bought a pair of running shoes and you want to be a professional athlete straight away. It takes time and practice. You and your girlfriend should talk about what you each want from this. Good luck

 

No one will be typical, my journey went something like this...

A couple of years of occasional weekend use.
Nearly a year of no chastity, doing other things.
Resumed, a couple of years slowly progressing from a few days up to a whole month.
6 months off due to a medical problem.
Last couple of years, myself and keyholder becoming much more serious about long term use, KH setting conditions for me to get release; Usually a list of DIY jobs and chores to accomplish, lockup times varying between a month and 4 months, with unlock times usually around a quarter of those.
She's just added weight loss to my conditions. I now have to get from just over 90 Kilos to the weight I was when we met 17 years ago, 82 kilos! (that's 17lb I have to loose!)
She knows it'll take a long time, especially as she's a very good cook! Only this morning she mentioned "this might take you a while, months if not years!"

 

Wow! That's pretty cool. Well done for trying a night so quickly.

You are right, it feels so strange the first few times. I appear to be unusual in that i self locked a few times back in August last year, never longer than 27 hours (7, 11, 27 then full stop). My next adventure was 50+ days starting 6 Feb this year.

Basically put, if you love your girlfriend, follow her lead and see how It goes. If this is a deal breaker for you, break it. If not, then let her lead a bit and see where it takes you.

Looking forward to hearing more from you either way!

 

Your in for a fun ride

 

Sounds awesome! I think we'll see more of this over the next few years - how did she discover male chastity? We're all dying to know.

Longer periods are actually easier than short ones. The body settles down after a couple of weeks or so. Turn ons become super intense, but day to day living is fine. Short periods of lockup are probably the worst of both worlds.

If I were you, I'd do what she said and see where this goes.

 

Yes we would love for her to join us in the mansion and learn what taught her about this wonderful life style

 

Please consider how lucky you are. It is very rare that this is instigated by the female. Sounds like you have a very special one there, so treasure, worship and adore her. Many men on this site would absolutely die for what you have been given.
And welcome!

 

Welcome to the site and well done for finding such an amazing woman, I'm not locked full time but she denies me for weeks on end. It's a frustrating but amazing journey. Enjoy and keep us posted how you're getting on

 

Your girlfriend sounds great. Learning to live as her chastity slave will take time, but its a small price to pay for what you are getting in return. And yes eventually you will be able to be locked for weeks if not months on end.

 

Hey steve_p, Any updates?

Are you even into this? I don't think any of this will work if you're not interested in it.

So "why would you want to do this," you may ask? I backed into this accidentally over the years. When I learned the chemicals at work a male, it made me really want to commit to it. Basically it is this:

...
Dopamine - the neurotransmitter that causes the feeling of pleasure we receive from engaging in certain activities. Sexual arousal, the eating of calorie rich foods, and for some people, certain other behaviors like gambling or shopping.

Oxytocin - often called the “cuddle hormone,” when the level is elevated, produces the pleasurable feeling of bonding or “connectedness,” as well as feelings of closeness, devotion and protection. It is the primary factor in establishing the basis for pair bonding.

Prolactin - the neurotransmitter of satiation. When the male has reached climax, it applies the brakes on dopamine and oxytocin. Prolactin levels generally remain stable in the reward center of the brain except during orgasm when they are substantially increased to deal with (i.e counteract or reduce the level of) the sudden flood of dopamine and oxytocin.

Basically, men are rewarded with dopamine by pursuing an orgasm and the dopamine grand prize is an orgasm itself. However, prolactin then kicks in and shuts down your dopamine buzz so the man can reset to a new goal of distributing his gene pool to another female conquest. By not having an orgasm (combined with affection and pursuit), your dopamine levels are above average and because it is reset less often, your receptors are more sensitive too. So the escalated dopamine puts us in a good mood and supports all of the ways we want to improve ourselves help out wives / girlfriends and family. The oxytocin makes us want to be more affectionate which make us more horny which keeps the loop going. As long as there is affection (making out with no release) and the promise of release in the near future, the hormones can keep the male going and going.

...

When I understood the chemicals in play, it made me want to use chastity to hack them and use them to make me better and have a better relationship with my wife. Great news is that the female orgasm has no negative impact on their interest in us or pursuing us, so it is a loop that can be ridden out by both of you. As a male, I feel the alternative hack to these chemicals (vs chastity) is to follow your animal instincts and literally try fuck everyone possible. Some are on that path, but that is not really something that i'm interested nor conforms to things like marriage or a family which I'm committed to.

Sex aside, If you really like your girlfriend as a person and she is someone you want to get more serious with and commit further with, then I think chastity would be great for you both. I think you need to be into the idea though and into her. Realize that this will create a strong and magnetic bond between you. That is why most of the people here continue to do it longer term beyond the kink aspects. If you like / love her already, it will just make it better. Don't worry about not having an orgasm for a bit longer than normal (go 1-2 weeks to start). -if she is playing with your cock one way or the other all of the time and you are going down on her all of the time, it will only take you a few days to get to that buzz state.

Keep us posted when you can!

 

The hormonal view is important and it is how men works.
Let time to get used to the cage I can garanty you that in a few weeks/months you will love it so much that you may feel naked without.
Don't go too fast, if you read around you will find that you are a lucky guy with an incredible woman.

 

@steve_p , I was also caged as a result of my wife's introduction of chastity to me! That was more than 2 years after we began our FLR and She was in the process of feminizing me (after catching me wearing panties to satisfy my fetish) She introduced the cage to further Her control over my compulsion to masturbate. We began slowly at first and while my longest lockup was nearly 60 days, we have now evolved to where I am only locked up when She goes to work. (Actually, when I'm not caged, I am always desirous of being locked up once again. It seems that being caged is now my preferred "natural state"!)

If raging erections are a problem for you, I would suggest trying a smaller cage or at least a smaller tube. Once in place, a tight cage really helps keep a flaccid penis flaccid. Those erections in a cage that's too large really hurt like hell and the smaller, tighter cage works to discourage erections from the very start. I is much easier that way, IMHO.

 

So great to hear this and glad you can sleep through! After about day 10 i find that increasingly elusive. Trust me, it's easier hitting double figures than a few days in terms of erections.

Also, thank you for the update. Sounds like you and she are getting on really well!

 

Wow, great write up there @steve_p I was feeling the growth in my spiked steel cage (not pleasant). Your story is great. I’m also quite new at this, my wife was convinced by a friend to try this & I was like “I’ve seen pictures, wasn’t interested, but I’ll try one for you (I hadn’t considered spikes)”!! Thus far I’ve only hit 53 hours max, just got relocated last night, I’m shooting for 72-80 this week as I’ve got a Dr. appointment, procedure on Thursday that will require removal. And yes, when out it seems like I miss being in. Even not having long term (yet).

 

This is literally an advert from a locked in list employee. Their marketing has been getting more and more clever.

 

Welcome to the club.
You have found yourself a hell of a girl. Don’t let her go

 

Congratulations on you Lock up @steve_p You are in a very unique position having her initiate Chastity and lock up. Stick with it for awhile because it can be an incredibly exciting journey.

Up to now you’ve always been able to cum when ever you think you need to. By having your cock locked and order someone else’s control your orgasm will be fewer and farther in between but a lot more intense. Your appreciation for being unlocked and getting an erection will also greatly increase your appreciation for sexual intimacy.

Yes this is a wild and kinky way of life but it can be very rewarding, give it a try for at least a couple months before making any decisions that could cost you such an incredible young lady. Keep the lines of communication open with her about any discomfort and issues you may have with your cage and Enjoy the Ride.