What does your chastity mean to you?

Discussion in 'Chastity and orgasm denial' started by locked_cuckold, Mar 28, 2019.

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  1. locked_cuckold
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    locked_cuckold Active member

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    What does your chastity mean to you?
     
  2. LesterBallard
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    LesterBallard Long term member

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    devotion to the person for whom I do it
     
  3. locked_cuckold
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    locked_cuckold Active member

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    I'ts hard to explain - it's an easy question but could be a deep one, hence why I asked it.

    First, it means freedom. Sex can be very addicting and when I'm wearing my device, it feels like control has been re-established. Because sex is harder to get, it's no longer a temptation. It really does feel like I've been freed of a burden. Each day in chastity is a day of true freedom. That's how I keep track. I don't look at them as 'days locked', I look at them as, 'days free'.

    Second, it might just be me but, as a TG being locked up allows me to disassociate myself from that part of my body. I hate that 1% of my body and if I'm wearing my device, it feels like it's not there at all.

    Lastly, comfort. It has a very calming effect on me. I'm much calmer and I don't know if it's because of lack of orgasms or the device. I know that one can wear a device and still orgasm - and that one can be chaste without a device so they're not necessarily connected...thus I'm not sure which to credit, but I AM calmer now.

    Bonus: More freedom. There were times when, just being honest, the wife wanted sex and I just wasn't in the mood. Want to start a fight with a woman? Turn her down for sex. Women turn men down and the man just has to 'deal' with it....no pouting, crying or complaining. Turn a woman down for sex and OH MY GOD! With me in chastity and someone else doing that for her, the pressure is off in that regard. I never *have* to have sex again, in fact, I plan not to.
     
  4. chastity_pantyhose
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    chastity_pantyhose Active member

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    some device to hold my erection and my bad habbit of masturbation..
     
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  5. sixofthebest
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    sixofthebest Long term member

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    Sublime Bliss.
     
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  6. Mark.Smith1970
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    Mark.Smith1970 Junior Member

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    I couldn't have said better. It's the same for me: I feel free and calm, as if the whole me was in the right place.
     
  7. PouchPantyLover
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    PouchPantyLover Long term member

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    So many things that I'll try to list them, but I'll miss a few -

    1. The symbol of my decision to submit to my wife's will, whatever that may be.
    2. The constant reminder that my penis is under her control.
    3. The reason my underwear smells faintly of pee at the end of the day.
    4. My 4 AM wake-up call.
    5. Sacrifice.
    6. Love.
    7. The bane of my existence and lasting happiness at the same time.
    8. A cure for a destructive masturbation habit.
    9. A whole new world of sexuality.
    10. A cage and all the baggage that comes with that word.
     
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  8. Consensus
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    Consensus Long term member

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    Oddly enough, comfort. It's like as if someone actually cares about that part of me again.
     
  9. Guest 4328
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    Guest 4328 Long term member

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    Chastity for me has meant resolution to help me cope with dealing with the health limitations of my dear wife. I was having difficulty dealing with things not being "normal" for quite some time. Once feeling unfulfilled, frustrated about my needs, I began a journey to find resolution, to find an answer that would be satisfying, while showing respect and dignity to my beloved.

    Chastity was the answer. It has completely changed my frustration in to contentment. I experimented for a couple months, but then made a vow to myself for one year. Once I locked it up, I was able to focus on ridding myself of the selfish desire permanently, and focus on the love of my life, as well as channeling my energies to be more productive, benevolent and focused on the needs of others instead of mine.

    After a couple months into my year, I knew it was not coming off forever. I am now in chastity entering month 16, only momentary removals every week or two for hygiene and shaving, and click, back to bliss.

    Chastity seems a simple thing, yet so much can and has been achieved by locking. In addition to the psychological freedom I now experience, there is a certain physical aspect to chastity that feels so unexplainably good. Instead of pining away in self pity over a few seconds of joy, I now, instead, enjoy a sustained physical pleasure that never goes away. It is superior to any form of pleasure I have ever experienced. Roller coasters are good though.

    I almost feel guilty for feeling this good. But why not, being a good husband to my wife, and friend to all, I guess I should enjoy a little something for myself.

    Thanks for reading. Chastity rocks!
     
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  10. Consensus
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    Consensus Long term member

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    What a heartwarming and life affirming answer!
     
  11. Tallestrina
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    Thank you SO MUCH! Love4lock. We are in a similar situation- it's a celibate relationship (with the sexiest woman I've ever known) due to her health issues. We've done chastity on and off for 10 years, but now I've decided that this time it's indefinate, and completely all about her needs. After two months I'm getting towards the zone that you mentioned, thanks for sharing- it's a big encouragement to me.

    Be happy everyone!
     
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  12. Rectrix
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    Rectrix Long term member

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    Great post, lovely love. I'm not sure you've previously discussed: what does your wife think of your chastity ANF your device? What does she think she gets from it?
     
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  13. cantgetout10
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    cantgetout10 New member

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    24/7 bondage. A way to tap into your submissive side and for your KH to explore her dominate side. A way to truly give yourself to someone.
     
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  14. jb123
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    jb123 Long term member

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    Trust and commitment between Mrs. B & myself.
     
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  15. Dfberns
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    Dfberns Living the dream, one day at a time

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    Wow, what a thought provoking question. As someone relativity new to the scene (entered into the chastity lifestyle on 09-01-2018, and as of this post, have been caged 194 days) I have had some time to reflect on this:

    Let me preface this by saying Di, my wife, and I have been married for nearly forty years. In all of that time we had what I suppose you would call a ‘traditional marriage’. Also for most of that time I was self-centered, egotistical, and generally a selfish SOB.

    To this day I don’t understand how, or for that matter, why she stuck with me; but she did, just like her vows – “For Better, or For Worse”, “In Sickness, and In Health”, “For Richer, or Poorer”… She committed her life to me, and I took it.

    Oh, to be sure I honored, and still do, those vows too. But not to, I’m sorry to say, the degree she did.

    Fast forward thirty-nine years. Our kids are raised, out on their own, and have kids of their own. Di, and I are both retired. We have no debts of any kind save for monthly living expenses, and we managed (thanks mostly to Di) to squirrel away a fairly good nest-egg. We also managed to hold on to relative good health.

    But most importantly, we made the journey together, and we survived – Thanks to her leadership. And you know what? Even though I toiled through life thinking mostly of myself. Thinking that “I’m the leader of this pack.” I wasn’t. I don’t know when I lost that position, Hell I don’t know if I ever had it in the first place. I don’t think I did. I don’t think any successful married man ever did.

    What I have come to realize in my life, as the old saying goes: "Behind every successful man there is a woman." This old cliché has more truth behind it than most people realize.

    So back to the question at hand, and my apologies for taking forever to get here…

    “What does your chastity mean to you?”

    Well for me it means that I have finally found my place in life. I’m exactly where I want to be, and am doing exactly what I want to do, with the woman I want to do it with. It wasn’t easy convincing her that this is anything other than just another kink, just another phase that I’ll soon grow tired of and forget.

    It is not! I have seen the light, it’s not about me and my feelings, my desires – it’s hers. I am a vessel to meet those needs, and wants, and desires of hers. Those, same desires, needs, and wants that I took for granted, and paid little heed to for so long.

    It isn’t always easy. I want more. But the epiphany I had tells me that I am where I need to be…

    And the state of chastity I’m in, and the cage I wear, remind me of that constantly.
     
  16. locked_cuckold
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    This is pretty much how I feel as well. I'm never more at home than when I'm in my chastity cage, and hate having it off for any reason.

    I prefer to look at my days chaste as 'free days', because that's what I feel I've gained - freedom.
     
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  17. havke
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    It serves different meanings for me... My chastity play started over 15 years ago... An online play-partner / Domme introduced me into the world of chastity. Being single those days I started experimenting and eventually using the plastic locks She controlled my sexuality.
    The girls in the pub never had any idea that the bartender they flirted with to get some free booze was locked ;-)

    Those days chastity for me meant, submissiveness, giving up control and overing myself to my online owner. It was a feeling of relaxation, a feeling She embraced me continuously. She was always on my mind.

    At a certain moment we both split our own ways. And approx 13 years ago i started dating my still current partner. One of the first things i did at the early start of the relationship were my kinks. Unfortunately she isn't into these kinks like i do. But hey she didn't start running away ;).
    I left chastity for a while... sometimes i did wear it just for my own foreplay. Building up etc.

    A few years later we started visiting the hospital due to the fact we didn't get pregnant. Lots of visits and exams further no result and no reason found. But these visits and medical ways to get pregnant did have a huge impact on my sexuality. Also on our sexual relationship, we didn't made love anymore... it was just sex on set moments by the doctors etc.
    Mentally this had such in impact i got moments of impotence. We even visited a sexologist, but it was just something between my ears / in my head. With ups and downs we made love... but often i got aroused and as soon as we started making love i fully got flaccid again... feeling some kind of pressure.
    Somehow that unmanly feeling of impotence triggered my chastity desire again. I started wearing the cage during day time again and got a more relaxing feeling and it at the same time enhanced my manly feeling again.
    So probably something that sounds weird... yes the cage made me feel man again... the reason for this is the fact i sensed every feeling of arousal. And all men know... we have those little moments of arousal a lot. So it eased my mind...

    I still wear the cage a lot during day time... still hope my partner/wife will get some kind of interest. Who knows...
     
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  18. desertsub
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    desertsub Junior Member

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    For me it represents my total commitment to submitting to my wife/Mistress. It is a constant reminder of her control over me. I love bondage and the chastity cage is a form of 24/7 bondage for me and a constant reminder that she has all control of anything I experience sexually. My wife is a very jealous woman and I feel that my chastity eases a lot of her anxiety over that. I've never cheated but that doesn't help with her feelings of jealousy but chastity does. I am proud to be locked for her!
     
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  19. Disciplined Boyfriend
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    It fulfills the desire to be controlled by my Mistress. She decides when I can have an erection, She decides if I have orgasm, She decides everything and I trust and love Her for it and give Her what She wants when She wants it. I could not imagine any other way now
     
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  20. Maid Denise
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    Maid Denise Maid for my Goddess

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    In my case. It means my wife loves me deeply and no other women can have me. I am owned and loved by her. In a way it shows my love ,devotion , and caring for her also . Being owned and loved by her came first then slowly it turned into a FLM and has been since . After two really bad marriages . Where neither one really truly loved me like Goddess P (wife) does. Let's just say it's a very nice feeling being owned .
     
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  21. OscartheTurtle
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    OscartheTurtle Long term member

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    When I first saw and really acknowledged chastity I came across a cage that would actually hold the turtle. It was like a bolt of thunder hit me. At the time my wife was rediagnosed with cancer. I didn’t share with her what I had come across as sex and physical intimacy were a thing of the past at that point. I ordered and started wearing cages to help curb my chronic masturbation. It was an unhealthy escape from what we were dealing with at the time. I had also hoped that it would be a way to incentivize weight loss, but that didn’t happen.

    It’s been quite a few months now since she has passed. There are a lot of changes I’m experiencing and trying to define who I am now. My hope is that any future relationship will include chastity in it, in whatever form that may look like.
     
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  22. NuderThanNude
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    NuderThanNude Active member

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    After reading through all of the replies proceeding mine I realized that my reasons for chastity are totally different than most men who do chastity. I don't do it to be controlled or to be submissive to my wife. I don't do it to prevent myself from pursuing a selfish habit. I don't do it so that I can be loyal or because I am ashamed of my small penis.

    My reasons are twofold. The first is that having my penis locked away in a cage is a head game for me and keeps me sexually aroused. I love the feel of cold, hard steel surrounding my penis and that it prevents me from touching and feeling it. The second is to improve my sexual enjoyment which after my wife's loss of interest in sex for medical reasons comes mostly from self stimulation. As they say, "absence makes the heart grow fonder" so in my case being deprived of touching myself for a period of time makes it so much better when I can.

    I am my own key holder - or should I say the time delay lock that prevents my access to the keys is!
     
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