Settling in

I have been thinking lately how things have changed in the last year and a half. As time has gone by
my mindset has changed in a way that has become very comforting. As I have read other's experiences,
I find myself in someways wondering how this all happened. Well I know how it happened, just not sure
how it changed.

Just a little background. Back in 2012 after losing 70 lbs my sweetheart that I met when we were 15 y.o.
felt uneasy about how my looks had changed and didn't like other women looking at me. I never had a
thought about others so I wasn't concerned about it. She was. We always had a good sex life and have
always been happy with each other. Being together since 1976 our relationship has been longer than most
people I know. Looking on a web site for a new wand I passed chastity devices. I had never really thought
about them and I didn't know at the time the world that has been revealed to me since then. Yes all of you
here.

I know it has been said don't give a chastity device for a birthday present, yes @Nicoftime I didn't know
that then. No matter this time. I just wanted to show Her that She already had the key to my heart, so
why not everything else. I bought a CB6000 like just about everyone else the first time. It was tough
trying to get it right do to the fact overnight was just about impossible, usually nude most of the time.
I made it to Her Birthday and we went to dinner that night. After dinner we were just talking and I gave Her
a card with the keys in it. I had wrote in the card what I had said earlier.I just wanted to show Her that She
already had the key to my heart, so why not everything else. She kind of paused and looked a little puzzled
and said "is that for some thing you have on" Yes I said. She was always liked trying new things, so
others remember you may not want to try this at home if you are not comfortable with it. I agree with
@Nicoftime . No big deal for us, we headed home and had fun with it.

As I have said, I never had a fantasy about chastity. When I got it I did get a little charge out of it and
She liked teasing me but there was no denial or long term. I had a key and cleaned up every day to
make Her happy. It remained this way until the spring of 2017.

As I look back now I can see changes that were going on. As life goes forward the day to day things
we do can hide the subtle changes. I did start to notice Her libido was on the rise, I thought She just
liked me lol. We had tried a number of devices to find something easier to keep clean. In May I was
looking at full belts killing time waiting for dinner start time. I get home at 2 pm, She gets home
about 6:30 pm. I happened to be on the Behind Barz website when I hit the grill running. I never got
back to the computer. When She arrived home I started the steak and She sat down at my computer
waiting with a Mike's lemonade. Of course as the computer woke up the website was still there.

We sat down for dinner and did our usual how was your day. toward the end she asked me if She
should of seen what was on the computer. I said you can always look, I don't hide anything from you.
She asked me what was up, I said "just killing time." She smiled and we just talked about the usual.
I think that was when Her thinking was changing. About a week later She asked me what the advantage
was with full belts. I just told Her what I picked up on line about them and that is when CM came into
view. She asked me to see what others were out there and check them out. I laughed, "you know
there not cheap" She said " the boys are grown now and were here alone" I was kind of surprised
at that response, I could see that She had an interest in them. Well it came down to Neosteel and
Behind Barz. I started looking at reviews and a few were on the CM website. I hadn't looked much
past the reviews to see what else was in store for me ha ha. She said She liked the Behind Barz
belts the best. I still wasn't sure why She wanted it we really didn't think we needed it. Little did I
know what was behind door #2.

The 4th of July we had fireworks in the bedroom. We were all tangled up and just being together when
She said "I would like to get one of those belts for you" I wasn't sure why , but She usually doesn't
want to spend almost 900 $ for the fun of it. She told me that I would look so good with it on. OK, I
just hope it works out. And She said "I really hope so" I think this is where I was wondering what was
going on. We ordered it together and She was so happy, I was a little puzzled by Her enthusiasm.
I do have to say it did cause a little stirring for me. While we waited for it She was very interesting.
She was teasing on a different level and much more verbal talking about seeing me locked up, She
also seemed very excited about it. Very wet indeed.

We received the belt August 11, a couple of weeks before vacation. I have to say it was an experience
wearing it for the first time. It was an awesome feeling and the look in Her eyes was just unbelievable.
Of course it had to be tweaked. I said 34 She said 36 I was right, it was to big to start. Went to 34 and
with a little bending it fit pretty good. I'm not one to wait so I wore it overnight and not to bad. A little
strange in the morning, but alright. I wore it for the weekend and did my usual exercise. I walk and run
since the weight lose to keep it off. I had no problem running but the next day I had a little abrasion
underneath ring. I took it off for a couple of days to heal and decided the ring was to small. I had used a
45 mm ring with the ball trap so I got the same one. There is not a lot of room between the tube and the
ring. I put it back on and used some silicone lube and that worked for everything but running. So I just
walked and ordered a 50 mm ring.

Well I had a full week to wear it before vacation. To work, play and home. Except for a little more tweaking
it fit very well, maybe to well. Off to Maine we went, She had me take it off for the trip, it's about 8 Hours
drive. This is where the plot thickens. I love to drive at night so we left at midnight. I drive She sleeps
great company lol. We arrived about 7:30 check in time is not till noon. We took a ride to Eastport and
had something to eat, headed back and checked in. Unloaded the car and as usual I go shopping and
She takes a nap, sleeping in the car is very tiring. Came back from shopping and I don't think She moved
at all. Around 5 pm the queen awoke. I was peeling carrots getting ready to make supper. She call me
over and gave me a big hug and asked me to get the belt out. Why I asked. She just looked at me. I
put it on and for the first time she locked it. Very slowly and very deliberate and the look on Her face
was I would have to say one of excitement and resolve. She took both keys and I had a serious case
of goosebumps. It felt like I stood there for ever just trying to figure out what just happened. She just
smiled and said "that's better, don't you think." Ok go back to what you were doing. The cottage is pretty
much one room and the bathroom. The bed was right across from the kitchen area. I cleaned some
potatoes for baking and started the grill I brought with us. Came back in made a light lemon and oil
dressing for the swordfish and turned the carrots on to steam.

All the while She was reading a magazine and gazing at me now and then. She was really turning me
on and I think She was turning Herself on. She asked about the time, It would be about 30 min before
fish time. She said She wanted me to do something for Her. So I went over to Her and She took Her shorts
off and grabbed my head and you can use your imagination, I'm getting a little tight right now. After about
10 minutes. She let go, pulled Her shorts on and said "What are you waiting for get the fish on". Who
stole my wife. That was the first time I ever was told to do something for Her and not even a kiss after.
She was so cool and collected I wasn't sure what just happened. That was the beginning of our next
chapter. She kept me locked the whole vacation. When we returned home She locked the spare key to
the spindle of the headboard where it has been since then.

She said "I wanted to know how much you wanted to be all mine." That was New Years day . That was
the next time I got to have the belt off and actually have a full orgasm. Never in my wildest dreams would
I think She was capable of this. The belt was off once a week for grooming and inspection and She is
always there. For me edging and RO with the tube off. She gets whatever,whenever She wants and
sometimes likes to give me a show. Since New years day, May 24 th our Anniversary and Oct 13 th
my birthday. That's it for me. Well I have to say reading this brings back the feelings of those days. How
did She change like that, the internet maybe. I think it is something inside. It has shown me someone I never
knew was there but was there all the time. And me, to be denied like this and love Her ever more, to
explore ourselves in a different way and let Her express Herself and just let go and be free. I don't think
anyone will ever have the answer to the how and why. I joined CM just after my wake up call in August
2017. You have all helped me along the way. I just wanted to tell my story since so many of you have
much more interesting stories. Yes I have to mention @Mash2214 I'll just say WOW. @Nicoftime I always
think of you as Mister balance. @Breathe a wonderful expressive women that reminds me so much of
my love. And my good friend @El Guapo thank you all. I have seemed to settle in and very happy to
be with you all. I'll give updates when they come up.

 

Thank you Joe for your fine handiwork and pride in what you do. I have been impressed and
my wife just loves to see it on me. She said " It was worth every cent, sorry every pound". It
has been time tested now since August 2017 and I don't think it is going anywhere soon. Wish
you all the best and thanks again for such a beautiful piece of work.

Allen

 

You know you kinda got me looking at the Behind Barz belt. CM is where I read part of your review
about it. And look where I ended up. I know you have come along way and I really hope you
survive what you asked for. Maybe you need a safe room instead of a safe word. lol Take care.
Allen

 

My Dear @Breathe ,
Maybe I'll just take pointers from you two. lol.

I have to say there seems to be a well that has sprung up between us. It seems to
have no bottom to it. There is a comfort and excitement just being together. She just seems
so vibrant being able to express herself to me and friends of Her's. She is so happy and
I wish I knew exactly what it is. Maybe you feel the same way and can't explain what it is.
I guess it is what it is and if we ever find the answer we have solved one of the mysteries
of the world,..or at least how chastity can work. Thank you for being you.

 

Hi @Rectrix , I sure am lucky. I never thought 40 years ago things would be like this. I never
really had a fantasy, Now it is more like I live Her fantasy and it is better than I can come up
with. Women on a mission sure can be persuasive. I just go with Her flow.

 

@Wonderwomanssub , You know there is something about these wonderful
women. Do you think I had any idea of what was ahead. Look around and see
where we are. Just hold on to her the best is yet to come. As for that beer I wish
we had a chance for all of us to toast these beautiful women and show them
how we all feel.

 

I believe that our journey moves forward even when you think your standing
still. I am not sure how chastity can bring so many changes and challenges
by it's self. The I guess what we call the dynamic guides our direction. The last
six months there has been a new development between us. I am still trying to
grasp scope of it.

I know men can have some really wild fantasies. When you have devoted yourself
to one woman for over 40 years some changes can be very, let me say not what
I would expect. The fantasies of women are not really shown here. I have seen the
capacity of love that my wife has shared with me all these years. To bask in the
warmth of that love has helped me become the loving man that She always
wanted.

Our love and commitment to each other has never been questioned. Chastity
has some how opened up another door that has been a little surprising for both
of us. She has a friend that I know about when she joined a few other ladies from
Her workplace here for dinner. She has gone through a divorce I hear her father
was abusive.

Over last 6 months they have spent a good deal of time together.
My wife is not one for gossip or soap operas. At work She has lunch late to avoid
those things. She went into the lunch room and found Susan almost crying.
She has been very lonely and unable to figure out why she can never find
a man that doesn't . They have become very close and have ended up being
intimately close. It has been quite a whirlwind the last couple of weeks. Thinking
about something and it actually happening are extremely different.I know their
are those that fantasize about these kind of things. Have never really thought of
the possibility. To think your Settling In becomes resettling in is a little unsettling.

I have to say the many strong feelings and emotions that come to the surface at once and
are a little overwhelming, not just for me, but Her also. We have all read the sensational
stories about subjects like this and think wow. Wow is an understatement. I mentioned
a few weeks ago that I was glad I had just had a physical in a status update, that was
act one. I think if I never started chastity none of this would ever have happened. Did giving
Her the freedom all it took for such changes to occur? Just where do I fit in? Where do
we go from here? Did She always feel this way? Just a few questions rolling around in
whats left of my mind.

Susan has been over and spent the night, in her own bed. She is a very sweet woman.
I have made meals that we have shared together and watched movies and just hung
out like regular friends. As for now I think we are just trying to figure this out, as I said
before, where is the owners manual. To those that have more intimate details, thank you
for your input. To all of you here, I am so happy to be included in the journeys we have
shared with each other. It is great that we can have this place to come together and
never be judged or be told, your not supposed to that. I feel as though we have become
part of a family that welcomes us home and we will always be welcome. Thank you
all for being here. Be back when my head stops spinning and I know where I am.

 

Well, it has another almost 6 months since I was last on this page. Things have changed for the two of us, but it has been for the better. Back in December I did keep a journal, but only shared with few at that time. A lot of it were my ramblings of how I was feeling and a sounding board for a few opinions. The end of May on the long weekend I gave a status update that Susan was taking us for dinner and two nights in a hotel, yes she was there. The following is something I wrote Friday before we left. The 24th was our 39th anniversary and i was thinking about the weekend. The dates will appear. This gives you an idea of where we are and a wonderful progression of love and understanding.

24/05/2019, 2:00 pm

Well, this should prove to be an interesting weekend lol. I have been reading over my journal from the beginning and I'm glad that I wrote it down when I did. Looking at the little pull here and a little pull here, and Her just waiting for the reaction. This is our 39th Anniversary. She has been doing the same thing to me all those years. I am not who I am now back then. I was pretty shy and had few friends. I spent a lot of time riding my bike all over creation. I fell in love with the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. And she is still here.

I never really thought about the changes because they happened over time. Back then I really didn't like myself and hiding behind the facade of saying hi, smile and run away. She changed all that. She gave me confidence in myself, showed by Her love how worthy I am for Her to love me. She drew me out of that shell and helped me to share my love with others. She made it possible for me to love all you with the diversity we all have, She always saw the good in people and made me recognize that. I could never say that I am a self-made man. I see Her as my friend, lover, soulmate and now a guide into the unknown.

I am a product of 39 years of unrelenting love and she is still on that road to never stay still. I see so many others in constant turmoil, breaking up and becoming bitter about everything. No matter what people do to Her, She never retaliates and just moves on. I have called Her my hero and told Her I wish I was more like Her. She said: "You are now." and just gave me a kiss. I guess I am more like Her now. And most of all She opened my heart to the love and compassion I have for others and made it possible to be able to share that with others. I wouldn't be where I am without Her. I would have to say that all these years it WAS about me. And now it is about us, so unselfish to give Herself to me, that it is my turn to do the same.

I know there is no sex talk here and this may be too boring or too deep. I had to give credit where it is due. If you find a woman that loves you unconditionally never ever discount that. Love and cherish her and maybe some of you may understand how I feel and some of you may already know. I think the hardest person to understand you is yourself. She understood it for me and told me what to do. Always listen carefully to the ones that love you, they may have the answers you need. I am no longer who I was 2 years ago and I am sure She will never let us stand still. Let it continue...

Saturday 7:51 am

I don't think that there are words to describe some of the feelings and emotions we have. All of last night it felt like a dream. You have seen in the movies where a guy walks into a room with a woman on each arm like a big shot and everyone looks at them, it is a very strange feeling to be looked at like that and feel the total opposite feeling of a big shot. I felt like how can these two women want to be with me?

Not in a put me down thing, that's long gone, but just so humbled to be at the center of attention which is one thing I never really desire. They were and are so beautiful together. Sometimes I can't believe the things people say about others. If people could just get over their fears and open their eyes.

I guess I can't fully explain the feeling of being between these two. It's has nothing to do with sex. Like you are all wrapped up tightly, surrounded by a love that is so different it's explainable. I feel no trepidation or restraint, I'm just in the middle of something that is deeper than anything I have ever experienced. I know it is very hard to explain love in words anyway. It is elusive because everybody's reference point is different. If I use the reference point of my feelings for Deb, it's the same, only different, that's my point. I can feel their feelings for each other.

It is not the same feelings toward me, there is a definite difference between the two of them. Tonight I feel so loved I wish I could share it with everyone, I already had all that I needed, I still can't fathom where I am. Later those feelings come out when we were together. The depth of touch between us makes the whole world go away. The ecstasy of being between them is euphoric. 7.3 years ago, just for fun, I started something and here I am, wherever this is. HOW!!!!!!! They are stirring, I know someone else that is always moving us both forward. Later

28/05/2019, 1:25 pm

Well, here it is, the almost unedited version. I decided to put this up because there are aspects that are becoming apparent with Susan. There was more discussion Monday afternoon. I think you will see what I mean.

Sat. 2:45 pm

We had a late brunch and came back and just chilled. They decided to go over to the mall. We are at the Marriott Hotel in Quincy where I grew up. They said I am in for it tonight. Promises, promises. I made the mistake of saying: "what else can you do to me." They had a very devious smile and said they were going to Victoria Secrets, oopps. Actually sounds like fun. Well instead of walking today I'm going to hit the pool, I love to swim, good work out too. What did I do to deserve this? I still can't believe it all... I have no more questions. I'm letting it all go, and just love them both. My only regret is I'm so much older than her, it doesn't seem to bother her so I guess that is just me being me. Hope you are having a good day.

Sun. 4:48 am

4:48 am To say I was in for it was an understatement. I'm not completely sure, but I think they toasted my retinas. Purple see-through teddies with matching thongs, very hot. Still trying to piece my mind back together. The sky is beginning to lighten and the room is dimly lit. The sight of the two of them peacefully sleeping fills my mind with such warmth. It looks like a dream world and feels like it too.

I feel totally relaxed and evidently by the aromatherapy of musk still very much aware of acts of the evening. My belt has never had a workout like that before. It started with visual stimulation. Deb knows just about everything that pushes my buttons and She was leaning on all of them. We started with my collar and leash, Deb took Susan's off. Deb gave Susan my leash and said: "all your's". I had an immediate brain freeze. I was rather shocked by the look in Susan's eyes. Think Susan is turning this way. Later.

Sorry for the interruption, Guess she hasn't had enough yet. Put her back to sleep. Where was I? Oh ya, Susan, I think about 6 months ago I thought she was shy and timid, not anymore. Well, she pulled me close to her, kissed me, grabbed my belt and said: "I want you to make me scream with ecstasy." Deb just smiled, laid back and said: "Do what the lady said." And I said what else can you do to me, I think it is a conspiracy, a good one though. Susan knew what she wanted and did it her way, she stopped me when she was getting close, I think she has been taking lessons, possibly has. After about 20 min Deb got close to her and started touching her. Then a big passionate kiss, and off she went. My view was quite spectacular, that's when I toasted my retinas like a burned in the image. Deb laid back and finished Herself with the Hitachi. I moved to the end of the bed. They rolled toward each other and embraced with beautiful smiles and big kisses.

I laid at the foot of the bed tired and very wet. I went to get up to get some tissues and Susan pulled me up to be between them. I almost felt left out, but I wasn't. Deb said:" we wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you." Priceless, speechless, unbelievableness, I don't think that's a word, but it fits. Deb asked me how I was. A little tired. "Anything broke" no. Deb said: "that belt was a great investment, I didn't know it would end up being so important to more than just me. What do you want to do?" Just stay right here between you two. Thank you, Mistresses, can't believe I said that. I need to take a shower desperately. I think they will sleep a while. I feel so satisfied, I don't think that really says it. Not once this evening did I think of my pleasure. I was so engrossed in theirs', I didn't feel that I missed anything.

Monday 27th.


Susan stop by unexpectedly, the offspring decided to go to a friends so there was plenty for all of us. She came by to ask if everything was alright after Saturday night. Deb and I looked at each other and asked her what she meant. She said that she wasn't sure if she should have done what she did with me. What did you do? I did what I wanted to. And what is your point? Should I have done that? What is the problem I asked? I felt like I was in control for the first time that I can remember, but it wasn't real. I said: "Back the turnip truck up." What wasn't real. You just did that for me. I submitted to you because Deb told you I was all your's. That's what it means to surrender. To give control to someone else and not made to. To us, it is the greatest form of love. Susan said: " It felt so good I want it for myself."

Wow, I never expected that reaction. Sounds like an eyeopener for her. We just told her to take some time and collect your thoughts. Emotions like this run high, ask me I'll tell you. She calmed down and we just talked. It might have stirred something inside to see it from the other side. Maybe a new start for her. She is so wonderful, there has to be someone for her. Anyway, going to sit with Deb before back to work tomorrow. Oh, to see her really happy with someone would please me to no end. Not that I want to get rid of her lol. Things seem to come fast and furious around here, must be this state. I'll leave the light on lol. Be talkin' to y'all.

I believe that Susan is beginning to feel what it was like to no longer feel like your being stepped on. No idea yet where it might take her, but time will tell. I don't have too many dull moments around here lately. This weekend showed me a few things. One of my reflections.

To truly understand the depth and breadth of a woman's love you have to let it. I think that has been some of my own misunderstanding of myself. I think it was no problem for me to let Deb have a relationship, I think it hard for me to believe She really wanted me to be there also. I feel that I was making excuses not to let Susan into my life because I went back to my old self, what's she see in me. Saturday night I totally submitted to her and can't believe what that has done to me. Seems like Deb keeps showing me all these little things I don't even see that keep me from being everything I could be.

It took six months to get to this point. I really don't know where this is all going. It seems that Deb and I are independent of this when we are alone. we have grown closer together with this and have a deeper understanding of how much love we are capable of. I have said it time and again, how can chastity change people so much. I guess it really becomes what you focus on and the direction you really want to go in. I'll be posting more soon, until then just go forward....