If you could go back in time...

Discussion in 'Chastity and orgasm denial' started by Kepoke, Sep 25, 2018.

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  1. Kepoke
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    Kepoke Long term member

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    At what age would you want to be locked up? What is the earliest you would have started with chastity had you known then what you know now about it!

    I cannot even tell you how much I masterbated once I found out about orgasms. It's actually really funny - I used to practice self bondage a lot when I was in my teens and I would put on dresses and pantyhose and tie myself up and escape. Well in doing so, something about the friction of rubbing my legs together in those pantyhose as they were tied caused me to have an orgasm and once I figured that out there was no looking back...3-4 times a day...

    with that being said I think it would be really interesting to think about what it would have been like to have been locked in chastity as a teenager.
     
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  2. Joey love
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    Joey love Long term member

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    You know in some form or another I’ve been asked that question many times- the old ‘what would you do different if you could’ question. And of course there’s many a things I would like to change. I would start by going back to last week and picking the right 6 numbers in the lottery!
    Seriously, if I was to change one thing it would lead to another, and then another and so on and I wouldn’t be where I am now. Being cool with where I am now I wouldn’t be able to change a thing.
    But in a fantasy world I would’ve embraced this ASAP and then some! I’m 52 now and I feel I’m at the beginning of a fantastic journey that’ll just get better with time. I couldn’t imagine where I would be now if I started 30+ years ago
     
  3. LesterBallard
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    LesterBallard Long term member

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    I wouldn't change a thing. Because change one thing and everything changes, and I wouldn't be the person I am now, writing what I'm writing, in a happy environment. Who knows what might have happened differently.

    Je ne regrette rien.
     
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  4. Finn-egan
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    Finn-egan Long term member

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    Hard to say. Being in my 50's and having had lots of experiences is what makes me content with being in very restrictive denial/chastity. It's not really a question of being locked at a certain age for me. It's more about what sort of relationship I might have pursued at an earlier age, that would have led to chastity. Pre Internet, these things were not easy to find however.
     
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  5. G42G
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    G42G Long term member

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    I would have tried this 10 years ago if I knew it would have worked out like it has so far. I'm not sure she would have been as ready as she is now. Hard to say out different it would have been but it's interesting to speculate.
     
  6. Guest 3729
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    Guest 3729 Long term member

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    There is part of me that wonders where Miss and I would be had if we started this a couple years into our relationship versus 11 years later when I did ask her. I've noticed a lot of the couples here are typically in their 30's or older. Because chastity requires so much openness, honesty and trust with your partner I would imagine most people in their 20's or earlier aren't quite prepared within their relationships make such a commitment beyond the kink. That's at least how I see it from a relationship standpoint.

    Personally speaking and although I've always adored femdom I don't think I would've been mature enough at 20 or 21 to handle a chastity relationship. Miss and I first got together when she was 19 and I was 20, we've gotten along famously and still to this day have never had a real fight. I feel like I would've wanted to be out of my cage for sex all the time would've sparked many arguments between us at that age. Back then for the first 3 years of our relationship we had sex nearly every single day. I don't think I'd necessarily want to give that up if I could go back, we had a lot of fun.

    On the other hand, if our relationship did survive the trials and errors of chastity at that young of an age there's no telling where our lifestyle and FLR would be. But in the end I wouldn't change anything.
     
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  7. Joey love
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    Joey love Long term member

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    Cool thing about this thread is revealing most seem to be very happy where they are now.
    A lot of relationships don’t necessarily have that
    Something to be said about this chastity thing
     
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  8. CuriousChaste
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    CuriousChaste Member

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    I wouldn't change anything. I think back to younger times that I had my share of "Me" time. But looking who would have been holding my keys would not have made a great keyholder.

    My current partner is much more open and accepting.
     
  9. gary170
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    gary170 Long term member

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    My wife and I have talked about this and we both agree probably would have started this life style a lot earlier
    The trouble is finding information and kids ,our kids have growen up and left home and info is more easy to find on the internet these days, as it is we have been living the chastity life style for over 9 years now
     
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  10. Guiness
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    Guiness Active member

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    I'd agree with this wholeheartedly. If I'd started earlier then who know who I'd be with now and what sort of life I would be living. I think I would have been much more into the fetish type club scene which would have brought me into contact with a completely different set of people.
     
  11. Rectrix
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    Rectrix Long term member

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    I agree with this, but I'm not sure I would have been ready more than 10 years ago -- way too alpha.
     
  12. LesterBallard
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    LesterBallard Long term member

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    Yep, agree with these sentiments. I've already said I wouldn't want to anyway, but I look back at the kid I was in my twenties, and I was an arse. Well meaning and mostly thoughtful, but still an arse. I probably still am, to some extent, but I wouldn't want to go back to how I was. I'm a boring old fart and happy that way.
     
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  13. Allen1987
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    Allen1987 All for Her

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    I think most of us see that where we are is just the right place. I wouldn't change anything, as it has
    already been said. I love where I am. And there is no doubt that our happiness is based on that
    openness and communication that we have. To many others lose that and I think that is when people
    grow apart and not together. Others might think our screws are loose, but I am sure we are all much
    happier then those that say that.:+1::love::lock:
     
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  14. Doug Scibor
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    Doug Scibor Long term member

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    Can't really complain but I would like to try starting chastity about a year into dating my current wife. She is becoming confident and comfortable after two years. I can only imagine what might have been after 25 years.
     
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  15. tqbartleby
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    tqbartleby Active member

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    As many have commented, any changes in the past would necessarily have led to a different present, so if one is currently happy it's a good idea to decline the ride in a time machine.

    But it's just fantasy, right? So I would have liked to start in my mid-twenties, when I started seeing she who is now my wife and keyholder. To bring the fantasy further, I would have liked to have cuckolding in the mix too. There's a chance she would have been persuaded as a young, randy woman. (We're now 60ish,)
     
  16. Giles_English
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    Giles_English Chaste slave

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    The technology wasn't there when I was a teenager! I discovered Victorian chastity belts in my early 20s, but had no idea you could buy something like that - because the Internet wasn't there either.

    On the one hand, yes I wish I'd known. A lot of relationships would have made more sense or worked better, and I might have avoided drifting into one or two toxic relationships.

    However, the 80s weren't very kink-aware or kink-friendly. So being quite so commitedly perverted to early might have meant missing meeting and marrying Xena. So, I'm glad I didn't.
     
  17. harddenial
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    An interesting but difficult question. Like others, with things being good now, it's just fantasy, but an opportunity to make some observations. As my wife likes the power exchange part of chastity best, she has to have experienced the reverse/past to appreciate the present. She also much prefers the no keys and no unlocking aspect of long-term, but this relies on me learning how to treat my skin really well to enable this, plus getting the right device, and it took me much longer than it should have to get to this point I think. We could have beneficially gotten into this lifestyle 10 years earlier, and if this had happened and caused the transition to oral-sex only back then, it would have saved me getting a vasectomy :).
     
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  18. Giles_English
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    Giles_English Chaste slave

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    LOL I kept on having girlfriends who enjoyed oral but weren't keen on penetration.
     
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  19. ChasteCharlie
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    ChasteCharlie Active member

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    My wife and I married in our thirties and indulged in mild bondage from time to time in the early years of our relationship. Had we known about male chastity then I'm sure we'd have started a lot earlier as my wife often says I wish we had tried this much earlier!
     
  20. Breathe
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    Breathe Be true to yourself

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    As others have mentioned, I wouldn't change the timing... Even though physical chastity was the 'tool' I'd been searching for, yet didn't realize it at the time. But since we're speculating here... Heh.

    I think I would have been quite naïve about it, with expectations that were a bit too high. Pet wouldn't have been mentally prepared for it years ago, considering he's learned a lot about what D/s actually entails since we've been together.

    This dynamic came at a perfect time, in My opinion. Six months into marriage with about a year of long distance left. Chastity gave Me comfort during this time and I think the 'novelty' was best placed for us late rather than early. It gave us both time to learn and has set us up for an interesting newlywed path.

    Safe to say there's no turning back now, though. :)
     
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  21. Mash2214
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    Mash2214 Locked today, tomorrow, forever

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    If I could go back in time. I would be retired already and a lot wealthier than I am now. I would have submitted to my wife sooner, not when we were first married but more around the 20years of marriage. It was at this time when our life together needed a change. We tried different things but nothing has brought us closer together than her taking control of my orgasms and erections. Where we’ll be in 10 years who knows. I do know one thing I’ll be 66 and considered by many to be an old man.
     
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  22. Digital
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    Digital Aspiring Gentleman

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    Interesting topic.

    I think looking back my biggest regret would be not waiting for someone to share the experience with. Like a lot of guys I've rushed into the experience solo adding to crazy male drivern reputation which tarnasishes the kink and spoiling a lot of firsts for a future partner.

    I imagine that it would have been a lot more interesting sharing those early moments with someone else and letting them enjoy guiding the experience.
     
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  23. Giles_English
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    Giles_English Chaste slave

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    I think it's certainly harder to start out with a fetish and find a partner. Discovering fetishes with somebody seems easier. However, that can also go badly wrong, with people committed to somebody kink-incompatible. So at least you know who you are!

    Also, though you've missed out on sharing firsts, you've also gone through all the faff and fuss of making chastity work without burdening a partner with it. Presumably, you can hand your keys to a partner confident that you can cope with whatever she decides, and there'll be no issues with chafing and concealment and so on. I think that's probably more important than sharing the special moments.
     
  24. OscartheTurtle
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    OscartheTurtle Long term member

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    Without overthinking this it would be really interesting to see how things would have gone if I could have incorporated chastity into my marriage early on. Early being between year one and year two. Hindsight shows there were certain dynamics already in play that could have made chastity and other aspects a real part of our relationship.
     
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  25. filltee
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    filltee Junior Member

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    It can be interesting to speculate on the OP's question and in an ideal fantasy world there is no limit to what you might want to speculate about.
    But my past the events and people in it are all part of who I am and I am very comfortable with who I am.

    Would I change anything? .... On the whole.... not really.
    So the mistakes, the errors in judgement, the times I was in the wrong place doing the wrong things all stay as is.

    Sounds cliched but Frank Sinatra's 'My Way' sums it all up quite well for me.
     
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