How can I make my husband less interested in chastity?

Discussion in 'Introductions' started by Very reluctant keyholder, Oct 19, 2017.

  1. bnd2plz
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    bnd2plz I keep my favorite things locked up tight!

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    My bet is that "Very Reluctant Keyholder" is really a male that has come to the realization that women see through this whole chastity game. Let me explain... Being a female key holder is far more work than being locked up in a cock cage. To play the game the female has to give LOTS of sexual attention, role-play with rules usually established by the male, be "sexy" according to what the male thinks is sexy, be accepting of what the male wants to do in this game (crossdress, pegging, cuckold, etc). Most women want a man that is strong, protecting, secure and in control.

    With all that said, like any relationship there has to be give and take. I play along in the game because of what I get in return. For some women I suppose there is nothing they feel they want, or can be offered by their male counterpart that is of any value to them. This can be a very sad realization for many men. Hence, the reason for so many men on here asking how to get their wife/gf to be more interested.

    Wish I had the answers for you men. The best advice I can offer is just to be so amazing before you request her to be a part of you chastity fantasy that she is willing to do ANY thing for you.

    Good luck!
     
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  2. jemmi
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    jemmi To Serve is to breath, Tis Truly I

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    Soooooo.. your a male then...
     
  3. Shepherdsflock
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    Shepherdsflock Long term member

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    Alright, I’ll play along. Chastity is my wife’s thing, but prior to that we had some bad fights over her low libido clashing with mine. If you don’t like what he likes, then you had better step up and offer an alternative. Just saying “I have a low libido and don’t really care about sex as long as it’s not weird” ain’t gonna cut it. Saying no to chastity without offering some other alternative is you just being passive and hoping he’ll stop. He won’t, because he’s bored and/or dissatisfied with your lack of engagement in your sex lives.

    It’s like the old saying, “Shit or get off the pot”. Either present him with some form of a sex life that you can both enjoy, or let him have his fantasy and hate it in private since you don’t care that much about the bedroom anyway.

    My wife hid behind the low libido excuse for years and it caused me a lot of psychological problems and fucked me up sexually pretty bad. I was ready to leave her over it right when she discovered her enjoyment of chastity and started engaging sexually after years of sex two or three times a year.

    Maybe chastity isn’t for you, I just use it as an example because it did so much for us. But if you don’t find something soon that will help you stay engaged in the bedroom with your husband frequently and eagerly, you have a train wreck waiting for your marriage. Stop it with the low libido excuses, grow up and be a wife to your husband instead of a little girl that’s afraid of sex.
     
  4. Jasmic68
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    Jasmic68 Long term member

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    Stab his penis with a knitting needle. Every time he asks you to lock him up, play along and then, just as he thinks you are about to lock him up, stab his penis. It will work as reverse psychology. He will stop asking for you to chastise him due to how much it hurts when you stab him. It will also mean he will leave you alone when you are doing some knitting.

    Unless of course he also has a fetish for being stabbed with knitting needles, then I'm afraid you have to choose which kink is the least annoying.
     
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  5. Mascara^Snake
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    Mascara^Snake Banned

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    Life is so short.
    If it's not working out for you then there are plenty more men out there.
     
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  6. squier
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    squier Junior Member

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    A very true sentence says: Love it, change it, or leave it.
    You wrote very clear you hate it - there will not grow any love for it in the future.
    You will never ever change it because he wont ........ rather he will start to get his by others.
    So, sorry to say .....

    One possibility is missing in this sentence: ignore it.
     
  7. Catbond
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    Catbond Aka Professor Mittens, aka Fluffy.

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    That’s one sad thread
     
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  8. Catbond
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    Catbond Aka Professor Mittens, aka Fluffy.

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    That’s one sad thread
     
  9. Pietje12
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    Pietje12 A champion was a contender who refused to give up.

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    In every way indeed. The nature of the topics on this board are such that there is no distinct boundary between reality and fiction but rather a grey area in which wishes and actions meet. If the description is accurate it comes quite close to rape in my opinion as he forces her into sexual activities that she really don't want.

    The part that bothers me is why "sewing and knitting" is mentioned. When used, it's to describe a woman in a derogatory way, but seldom as a self expressed character description.
     
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  10. Giles_English
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    Giles_English Chaste slave

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    These are huge hobbies in the UK!
     
  11. gyrator53
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    gyrator53 Member

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    Too right - The now defunct Traplet Publications that did all sorts of hobby magazines sold more copies of their "Patchwork and Quilting" magazine than they did of any of the 'big boy's toys' magazines and by a huge margin.
     
  12. Pietje12
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    Pietje12 A champion was a contender who refused to give up.

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    Really? I studied in the UK for 1.5 year back in the days when pubs had a 2300 hour closing time. What women did inside and outside the pub didn't look like knitting.
     
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  13. bondinchas
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    bondinchas Long term member

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    I had a friend who was happily married with two teenage kids, played rugby, alpha male in every respect, except... his hobby? Cross-stitching!
     
  14. Mascara^Snake
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    Mascara^Snake Banned

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    Whether the thread is bogus or not. The outome would be the same for me. I would leave him.
    But then I'm useless a knitting and I love having men locked up so it's unlikely.
     
  15. Giles_English
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    Giles_English Chaste slave

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    It's become cool since then. Partly a hipster thing, I suppose.
     
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  16. hunci
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    hunci Member

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  17. jemmi
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    jemmi To Serve is to breath, Tis Truly I

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    Lol
    Lol.. Giggling.. blushing.. sorry..
     
  18. Pietje12
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    Pietje12 A champion was a contender who refused to give up.

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    I have to choose my words carefully right now. Women from the UK - in contrast to most other countries - have the potential to reach the "absolutely wasted" level instead of "being drunk". Just a personal observation and not meant in an offensive way. But still, that knitting part.

    [​IMG]
     
  19. Mistress B
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    Mistress B Mistress B

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  20. Mistress B
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    Mistress B Mistress B

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    They are popular, yes but not often mentioned together with pegging.
     
  21. jemmi
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    jemmi To Serve is to breath, Tis Truly I

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    at what point do we just let it go now?
     
  22. Jasmic68
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    Jasmic68 Long term member

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    The way British women can get absolutely wasted and lets not be sexist, the men too, is to many of us a cause of national shame. You can be as offensive as you like, @Pietje12, they (as in the ones who do get wasted, not the entire female population of Britain) deserve it. Accident and Emergency on a weekend night is not a pleasant place to be.

    As for the continuation of this thread, this play of words, thoughts and responses from the more regular contributors of the Mansion is exactly what keeps me coming back for more. For instance I thought the idea that the use of hobbies such as knitting and crochet were meant as a derogatory jab at women was a fascinating idea, one that I hadn't considered.
     
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  23. Thatguyontheinternet
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    Thatguyontheinternet Owned by Thatgirl

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    I’m part of a classic car enthusiast forum. A very niche sort of thing. There’s these couple members who constantly complained about all the things that everyone else was talking about doing with their classic cars. They’d particularly seize upon any example of genuinely poor classic car ownership and hold it up as the “problem with classic car enthusiasts”. These few people weren’t always wrong. But it turned out that these few people had never actually owned a car, let alone a proper classic, and thus rarely had anything substantive to contribute to balance out their negativity. As a result many members stopped paying them much attention. You see they began to realize that these few members didn’t seem to even like cars, and classic ones least of all (they just liked taking selfies in front of them it seemed).

    Some members started to suspect they just didn’t know how to drive a stick, and were secretly and deeply jealous of those who could - but that was just conjecture, and neither here nor there.

    Then something serendipitous happened. A brand new member joined up and on their first post they made every point and seconded every complaint that these few members had obsessively focused on. And all in a one single, neat post! But the best part was that this brand new member, who felt exactly the way they did... wait for it.... Actually owned a car! And a classic car at that! What vindication these few members must have felt as they watched their long-expressed personal pet-peeves regarding classic car ownership being addressed. And people say the universe is random!


    Anyhow, I’ve no idea what made me think of that story. I woke up at 3:30am to use the bathroom and it just popped into my head. Funny how the mind works. Sorry OP, for the totally unrelated tangent. Back to bed :)
     
  24. Pietje12
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    Pietje12 A champion was a contender who refused to give up.

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    I lived in the UK. I loved it. I feel it's my 2nd homecountry and that puts the shame on me as well. I don't judge about the activities in the second part.
     
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  25. NauticalBear
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    NauticalBear Member

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    I think when you write something like “I wouldn’t have married him if....” then you have said what you are afraid to say. No human has the ability to control the emotions of another. You can’t blame anyone for being unhappy; all you can do is change your situation or admit you prefer it to your available alternatives.

    Suggest you put on your big girl panties & say “I don’t want to do this. Fasntasize all you like; I’m out.”

    You can’t blow hot & cold & expect to be taken seriously. I don’t know how a married couple resolves serious sex disconnect; maybe couples therapy although I’m skeptical. If you can find a level of participation you can tolerate, maybe you draw a firm line, but if yr husband’s kink really disgusts you....well, I’ve never heard of a person changing thier kink. It’s hardwired. You may have some hard choices ahead of you. Best of luck.
     
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