A question for online lockees and keyholders ONLY

Discussion in 'Chastity and orgasm denial' started by L-u-c-y, Jul 5, 2017.

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  1. L-u-c-y
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    L-u-c-y
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    #1 L-u-c-y, Jul 5, 2017
    I have sent out quite a few locks over the last 3 or 4 years after people have begged and pleaded for them. I have locked some for nearly 2 years, but by far the most common thing to happen is.... they disappear after a week and I never hear from them again. Some even delete their profiles.

    I understand that the reality of being locked doesn’t live up to their expectations and fantasies, I understand it’s not easy being locked by someone you have never met, and I understand that they would rather be in a real life relationship and locked in person. But my question is... why “do a runner”? Why not say “sorry, it’s not how I thought it would be, I can’t continue” or “I need more than you can offer”. If someone said that to me I would be fine with it. Why run away and cut contact? Is it embarrassment at not being able to live up to your promises? Or is it that the keyholder is no longer any use to you so you see no point continuing contact? Or is it depression that your fantasy wasn’t how you thought it would be?

    I’m curious to know. Maybe I am just not very good at keyholding :)
     
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  2. Carraraboi
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    #2 Carraraboi, Jul 5, 2017
    I find the issue with the ball locking devices are that they are easy to get out of, the locks are easy to break or for even some you can slip out and back in, not saying that once you locked up you feel a rush of excitement of all sorts of hormones going on, right but as you carry on with life it becomes not so exciting, that's when a real chastity belt comes into place, like the Carrara I wear once it's on its on, no escaping, so you go on with your day and every moment you are wearing it whether you feel in the mood for it or not it's there, with these ball locking devices they receive your key, spend a day or two in it and then simply break the lock, but obviously once they have they feel bad for what they have done and shamefully delete their profiles and more than likely start new profiles and just avoid you directly.
     
  3. L-u-c-y
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    L-u-c-y
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    #3 L-u-c-y, Jul 5, 2017
    Thanks for the reply. I don't find it shameful that they can't carry on, it's only in their minds. Do you think they then try being locked by someone else or give up on chastity entirely?
     
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  4. supersub
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    #4 supersub, Jul 5, 2017
    For me it was tough to mix this world and the real life stuff I guess, the reality is that when you are married with children it's virtually impossible to be locked by another person. I'm ashamed to say I did the whole runner/profile delete thing for which I am truly sorry.thank you Mistress Lucy
     
  5. L-u-c-y
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    #5 L-u-c-y, Jul 5, 2017
    Yes you did do a runner, but why not just say how you feel instead?
     
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  6. supersub
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    #6 supersub, Jul 5, 2017
    Embarrassment I would say, it's quite embarrassing just to admit that fact as well, double embarrassment!!
     
  7. L-u-c-y
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    #7 L-u-c-y, Jul 5, 2017
    You should have admitted it the first time then :)
     
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  8. supersub
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    #8 supersub, Jul 5, 2017
    Yes I should have Mistress, for which I am truly sorry, thank you Mistress
     
  9. Chastitybf88
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    #9 Chastitybf88, Jul 6, 2017
    Mistress Lucy, I would never pull a runner in you, as I would be honored to be locked by you! :)
     
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  10. submaleuser
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    #10 submaleuser, Jul 6, 2017
    Not that I am experienced at all in this but I just locked myself for the first time a few days ago and have a online KH. I think if the person was serious about being locked in the first place they would not be able to "run" me personally I cant physically unlock myself until my KH lets me even though I have the keys (check out my most recent post to know how this is possible) yes they could "run" after you unlock them the first time but if they secure them self to the point where they cant get out even if they want to I dont think they will "run"
     
  11. supersub
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    #11 supersub, Jul 6, 2017
    I think if you are a single guy it would be possible to devote yourself to it properly, I'm sure I could if I was, but when you have a separate home life it is hard to do....
     
  12. Carraraboi
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    #12 Carraraboi, Jul 6, 2017
    More than likely they will either move on and try with someone else or just make up a completely different profile, that's why I said the only way to experience true chastity is with a real chastity belt, not a ball locking device, think of it this way, i lock on my Carrara and physically hand you the key, that belt is not coming off unless it's cut off or I get the key back from you, i do something wrong to piss you off and you threaten to destroy my key, that becomes a real problem for someone like me in an expensive device like mine, these cheap Chinese things you can just cut with pliers or a saw and you get another for $15.
     
  13. permanentslave
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    #13 permanentslave, Jul 6, 2017
    Mistress Lucy, please reference its FetLife response to Your same inquiry there. ;)
     
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  14. L-u-c-y
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    #14 L-u-c-y, Jul 7, 2017
    What is the point of keeping moving from keyholder to keyholder and only lasting a few days with each, unless it is the initial buzz they like only.
     
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  15. Carraraboi
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    #15 Carraraboi, Jul 14, 2017
    Initial buzz, they cut the lock, have a wank and move on til the urges come up again, that's why there is nothing better than a device where the lock can't simply be cut or broken.
     
  16. filltee
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    #16 filltee, Jul 14, 2017
    There are the guys who want the lifestyle that goes with the 'game' and those that want to get off whilst their sleeping partner thinks they are watching tv or porn.
    As opposed to even considering the reality of being locked and denied if only for a few hours by a real person and in person within a relationship beit only a professional one it just does not compute. Who with how do they even broach the subject and how emasculating and embarrasing would that be?

    They simply enjoy the fantasy of being locked and denied becoming desperately horny then being allowed to have a (hopefully) completely awe inspiring tsunami of an orgasm in the situation of their choice. 5 minutes locked if even have a device and talking about what could be, then a few minutes tease, then get off and log off job done. Hell for these guys even actually owning a device is maturbation fuel. I'm going to talk to that Keyholder woman again next weekend.. she doesn't have a name.. he will probably masturbate a couple of times during the week.

    Finding someone who wants to play along with that is, I imagine, most unlikely. So that leaves the professional or lifestyle keyholders who generally want more than a 10 minute relationship and the denial period to last more than a few hours. The guy's only real option is to get her to rev him up preferably with his fantasy, draw it out a bit.. then he dumps her and gets off in the manner of his own choosing.
     
  17. Vinny
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    Vinny Locked up again. Starting year 6.

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    #17 Vinny, Jul 14, 2017
    My guess is because they view you as a service provider and not as a person. When we see a teacher, policeman, cashier or any service provider. We see them for what they do and not who they are beyond their service. I do the same when I no longer like the way my hair stylist does my hair. I do not talk to her and tell her that I do not like her skills. I just stop going to her. Plus guys are jerks. :)
     
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  18. L-u-c-y
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    L-u-c-y
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    #18 L-u-c-y, Jul 14, 2017
    The difference to a hair stylist and me is they don't pay me :)

    The problem is they lie. I don't offer any service, they come to me and offer to serve me. This is how it goes:

    Lockee - Hello, please may I serve you?

    Me - Tell me how you can be useful to me

    Lockee - I will lock my cock in chastity and you can have the key

    Me - How is that useful to me?

    Lockee - It will make me a better slave

    They are the ones offering a service, but in most cases it's just lies.
     
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  19. smash363636
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    smash363636 Long term member

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    #19 smash363636, Jul 14, 2017
    I ditch the person usually because they lock me and have 0 contact after! Or the go 0-wild in an heart beat. One keyholder still thinks I'm locked and haven't talked to me in 60+ days!! And have tried to contact multiple times!!
     
  20. L-u-c-y
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    #20 L-u-c-y, Jul 14, 2017
    Do you do anything for a keyholder? Or do you see them is being there to do things for you?
     
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  21. smash363636
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    smash363636 Long term member

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    #21 smash363636, Jul 14, 2017
    The other problem I have is I own an Carrara belt and a Steelwerks cage, that standard locks won't work and I don't feel comfortable shipping my keys off in case of an emergency and I need them quickly! I use Emalock to hold my keys!
     
  22. smash363636
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    #22 smash363636, Jul 14, 2017
    Never been asked to do anything! Wouldn't know what to do
     
  23. L-u-c-y
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    #23 L-u-c-y, Jul 14, 2017
    Maybe that explains why they have zero contact with you.
     
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  24. smash363636
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    #24 smash363636, Jul 14, 2017
    Problem is I never had anyone to guide me! I'm an very open guy, willing to try just about anything once
     
  25. L-u-c-y
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    #25 L-u-c-y, Jul 14, 2017
    Maybe you should spend more time researching a keyholder and finding one that is right for you.
     
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