Quitting Chastity?

Just bloody ask her, she's right here

 

@Thatgirl That sounds like an excellent solution and I hope it works out for you.
If @Thatguyontheinternet is anything like me, just knowing that infractions are noticed in the first place can be helpful and enough to stay motivated. Knowing that eventually the punishment will catch up, well, that's a powerful thought.

 

@Thatgirl this is the exact arrangement we currently have. She did not want to drop her bags at the door and give me a paddling....plus to be perfectly honest, paddling me gets her off and she doesn't want to do it until she's ready to reap the rewards so to speak.

So she keeps track in her head, and she usually doesn't forget the number, but we sometimes forget the violation lol. When she's ready she does it, but in certain circumstances like I had last week, she told me to get out of bed in that instance immediately and paddled right then. I'm sassy apparently...who knew.

Glad to hear you guys are on the same page. And yes living curious' post was very well written, when done I had thought I owed him tuition fee.

 

Many congratulations to @Thatgirl and @Thatguyontheinternet for managing to come through this "bump" .
Thank you both so very much for sharing this with us all .

Many new couples should read through the entire thread as there is great advice on here as well as seeing a real couple go through what many go through or have gone through .

Big massive happy hugs to you both

 

Spot freakin' on dude. That's exactly right.

The more hardcore Dommes may not respect the way we do things, but, despite Her having the final say in all things chastity, we still make the greater directional changes together. The thread was a mutual decision. She posted it because, frankly, she's better liked and we knew people would respond to her post, whereas mine would either be overlooked or just full of people telling me what a dick I am.

And I do get that compared to so many I am SO SO lucky to have someone as engaged in this as @Thatgirl is, as sexual and adventurous as she is. And I do wish I could be better for her. But we're learning this together. The idea of being submissive in a relationship had never even crossed my mind. It never even crossed anywhere near it. Sometimes I wish I had had all these secret submissive fantasies for so long like lots of members here had, so that I would have some idea how to do it. But I don't. Because I didn't. So despite knowing I'm a crazy lucky man, I nonetheless sometimes have doubts and feel unsure about all this. And she's not got any more experience being dominant than I have being submissive, so I think it can be tough for her to more assertively tug on the lead when I start to falter in my eagerness to follow.

That's where the forum comes in. And you're right. It's a shame that some of those who hold themselves up as the most experienced and knowledgable choose to limit their advice to calling me childish or impatient or the like. It feels like a cop-out. Bash the crappy sub. How does any of that help Her? You know, it occurs to me that the men on this site form relationships at some level, give some advice and help each other out. I've got a handful of private messages from men here giving me advice how to be better at this. I wonder how many of these hardcore experienced Dommes have reached out to @Thatgirl to talk to her or give her advice on how to deal with a rookie sub as a new new Domme?

 

And that I'm a big dumb idiot whose wayyyyy spoiled

 

I agree.

 

I believe the very reason my kh has pretty much ended all interaction here. I see her logging on, and liking or commenting on my threads or status, but that's about it now. A shame, I thought she would gain some friendships and have an outlet like I have. Then again I don't have people constantly sending me messages or asking about locking them up. Yes I know it can be reported but I believe it would be like pushing away water...more instantly takes its place.

 

I could tell

At least know outside the realm of our budding d/s I spoil @Thatgirl to the best of my ability too.

 

That is so freaking hot, you're a lucky man @Thatguyontheinternet Was the O in chastity or out?

 

I saw the light and thought i'd get in
Sounds like @Thatguyontheinternet is just asking to be punished more often and locked for longer periods of time.
That's fine with me

 

Wow @Thatgirl, you must really care about him a lot to put that much effort into your physical relationship. Again.. Jealous...

 

She was using her phone and as soon as she logged on she would have a bunch of pms I told she could turn them off but she was kinda over it. She didn't want it to be work. Maybe she'll let me use her phone and let me change her settings.

I've actually seen it on her phone and doesn't look anything like the site on my phone. She also said that she doesn't always get notifications when I post.

 

Mistress Wolf has also stepped away from CM for these same reasons... got tired of the barrage of pm's (some quite offputting).

 

Several months back the site underwent some updates to its physical appearance. There's a setting somewhere in there that lets you revert it back to the traditional red and black view you're probably still using. I had @Thatgirl do it for me too.

A Mod or other member can probably tell you exactly how to do it. I just remember it getting done for me also.

 

With my KH/Bride away on business travel some part of most work weeks lately, I sometimes feel like chastity is a wasted exercise for me. The whole dynamic is much different when you are alone and feel alone. But then I think and hope that the thought of quitting is just me being needy and selfish again, and that is what we are trying to not be.

 

Maybe thats the key? We, as the men locked up, simply want some kind of guidance from our key holders. Where is she going with this? What is expected of me(in her view)? I know in my case my wife didn't want to discuss chastity at all. So that kind of left me in the dark. When I was left alone in the dark and to my own devices, a lot of times it seemed pointless. I guess in most cases communication is key, but what to do when your key holder doesn't fancy the discussion? I guess that's where I am at.

 

My problem is being careful to have a discussion rather than a bitch session. But you must communicate at some point in time. I hope things improves for you.