How long do you normally go?

Discussion in 'Chastity and orgasm denial' started by RockyB, Mar 5, 2014.

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  1. allaboutHer
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    allaboutHer Long term member

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    Hello All.
    If I am reading incorrectly forgive me. When I became "allaboutHer", my days of topping from the bottom (which I did incessantly for the first 7 yrs of our foray into chastity to the point it was NO FUN for my Wife/Mistress/Keyholder) ended over 2 years ago. This is HER show now. No contracts, no expectations for a certain number of orgasms for me, no expectations allowed for me, period. This is her game...she holds the key...IF I want "the game" (at this point obviously more of a lifestyle) I am expected to play by her very vague rules, and being vague is part of her approach...it is MY job to figure out her thoughts...equally frustrating as my infrequent to non-existant orgasms. We love each other DEEPLY, and she doesn't let a day go by without proudly sporting one of her symbolic key necklaces. She has embraced HER role, HER way and I accept it now without dissent any more. If it means I get barely 1 orgasm per year, so be it. We share incredible intimacy much like when we were dating now. She assures me she LOVES our sex life (I ask on occasion), so I will happily continue to live my life "allaboutHer" no matter how frustrated, horny or confused I am. She lets me be myself all except for the orgasm thing...:)
    allaboutHer
     
  2. svdmvs
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    svdmvs Member

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    hello, once a year would be very heavy,i was told 9 for me,hope more but...
    if all men should were it,it would a better world
     
  3. filltee
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    filltee Junior Member

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    Can't really say what the mean average is or even a loose guess. With my last gf rarely less than a couple of months between orgasms and often well over double that, and has been even longer than that.

    To be honest when I was not denied for a least for a couple of months I'd enjoy my orgasm but at the same time feel a little let down that it had not been longer.
     
  4. OwnedByAmy
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    OwnedByAmy Long term member

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    Amy has decided (and who am I to argue?) that I am to have no more orgasms for a very, very long time. At no point in the forseeable future will I be allowed an orgasm, whatsoever. Meaning months, if not a year or years. It pains me, because I truly do enjoy very much having them, but it is for the best.

    Need to update my slider, she did allow me two on Sunday before last, but the memory of those will have to sustain me for a good long time. When home, can't do it on my phone, just like I can't respond to chat boxes.
     
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  5. Lialuvit
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    Lialuvit Just starting out down this road in our marriage

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    First time using the honor system she made me go 50 days. We had a cage for the last 10. We are planning the next session, well she is... It will start at anytime, I will be told to go out and purchase her a Princess charm... Which will be the singe ongoing I am to be caged all the time except for work.

    I expect more than 50 days .. And she will be adding tasks over and above making the bed and keeping her panty drawer folded nice. Also, if she send me a pic of her charm I have 10 mins to take a pic of her cock in its cage or a week is added ...
     
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  6. N23orMore
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    N23orMore Long term member

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    Boy do I feel like a newbie.. Just got my MM Jailbird and am on day 5 and may not be out till a week. It is becoming a torturous yet very sexually enjoyable trip so far. It has definitely heightened my senses once she releases me. She is still learning how it all works but enjoying learning.. Learning too fast I am afraid. But that is what adds to the fun and enjoyment.
     
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  7. OwnedByAmy
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    OwnedByAmy Long term member

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    Very awesome! :)
     
  8. Lialuvit
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    Lialuvit Just starting out down this road in our marriage

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    Princess told me today she is setting next session to no less than 4 months and it may start tonight.

    I am to travel home caged and she me be stopping at the store for me to by a charm that will be use as my chasity key she wears.
     
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  9. ell-ess-dee
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    ell-ess-dee Member

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    As with some other here, my GF has no schedule, but the longest I've gone is 22 days and that was last September. I cant't get past the two week mark now without having an orgasm, they happen by accident whilst locked as I'm locked 24/7.

    I get so horny 3-5 after days after last orgasm that it gets too much to much to handle and my body just has to give, and out it spasms, intentional or not. Sometimes on the spot, just thinking about an orgasm can trigger an orgasm for me. Very frustrating for my GF.
     
  10. OwnedByAmy
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    OwnedByAmy Long term member

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    Maybe you and she could work out a punishment system to discourage that?
     
  11. svdmvs
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    svdmvs Member

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    If you have to wear it you have to obey,if not....;
     
  12. OwnedByAmy
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    OwnedByAmy Long term member

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    It's been said before that the most effective chastity device is the one between your ears, because short of a PA, no device is 100% inescapable. There have been times when, for one reason or another, I haven't been wearing my device, but if I were to have had an unauthorized orgasm I would have been in DEEP trouble. There's such a thing as her being able to trust you and you having the self control to resist that urge and remain obedient. But maybe that's just me. :)
     
  13. Harry Haversackers
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    Harry Haversackers Horny Old Goat

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    It's not just you. I'm of the opinion that if your wife/mistress/keyholder can't trust you not to jerk off the minute her back is turned, then you should find another lifestyle/kink/game. Trust is an essential element in a relationship where chastity is practised.
     
  14. BlueEyes
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    BlueEyes The lifestyle pumps in my veins...
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    @Harry Haversackers and @OwnedByAmy - a little something on honor and PA's...
    If it is truly a matter of trust, a matter of living up to your fantasies of surrender, and not just wank to them, why then a need for a PA, that will make your device unescapable? I have a PA, - and have had one since way before chastity was on the the agenda.

    It stayed on - because SHE wants to be absolutely sure that it will remain untouchable, that SHE and only she has access to her property - even when I am away for days. And because - as she puts it: "Why on earth wear such a device if it does not suit its purpose?"
    Only in this way it makes sense for her... - and Yes, - it makes her very comfortable...

    Maybe, - just maybe, she will down the road be as comfortable in knowing that I will always honor her command, never to stimulate myself in anyway, - and then the device will come off more and more. She will see my self-denial as a final evidence of my surrender and her power over me.
    I will however accept any path she will be taken!

    Frankly I - like most guys in here - feel pride in wearing my device, - but I can see a distant future where my submissiveness and her belief in my total surrender and my self-control could lead to life without device.
    (If she where into feminize me, i believe that the device would stay on for good, - but that is not the case;-) )

    I wear a ring engraved with "property of DRE" on the inside, - and that has to never come off. She likes this token a lot, and so do I. It is visible to me and her all the time... - even if the device would come of - in - lets say 10 years from now:):)

    And how long do I go? :She has upgraded my time to indefinitely! - and I love it....
     
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  15. OwnedByAmy
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    OwnedByAmy Long term member

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    My time has also been upgraded to indefinitely. No time soon at all.
     
  16. ell-ess-dee
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    ell-ess-dee Member

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    There is a punishment system. I get caned or cropped - HARD, but it still doesn't help.. In fact I was pleasuring her this morning to orgasm and I came, the punishment came soon afterwards and I'm having trouble sitting down typing this ;).
     
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  17. MistressBitch
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    MistressBitch Long term member

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    lol, these posts do make me smile. There is no right or wrong, just different. My sub hasn't orgasmed this year at all yet. I have no particular plans to let him, and as far as I can tell, he has no deep hankering desire to have one. We both love the fact that i can have him horny and turned on whenever I want to, he always wants more, hes never disinterested (unless he is poorly) and he decided that not orgasming is a small price to pay for the sensations and emotions he is currently enjoying. The only 'time limit' I have sort of imposed is that as far as I am concerned, he will never maturbate again, or at least not for the next 5 years. His initial chastity was requested to stop him masturbating, so i figure a mega long time for that is definitely in order. I would say never again on that one, but I feel realistically, never is a blooming long time.

    I think this issue also can change with time and experience. At first i felt mean not letting him cum, so i let him cum on his birthday and again at xmas, now i realise the full implications of chastity, its not actually a torture or a punshment to not let men cum, its actually a way of prolonging the better aspects of their personality. Do bear in mind, that some men go grumpy and horrid for the first few days after climax, so this eliminates that, and it takes a few weeks for their bodies to acclimatise to the changes in hormones that not cumming causes, so for it to be effective, you need to keep them chaste for a few weeks. In my case, my sub hasn't come for over 3 months now, and i'm just playing it by ear to see if/when he might cum. I don't even know myself yet. Last time when we had a date set, it all went wrong, so now I dont plan to have a cum date, just lots of dates of sex, edging and full of fun. If and when he starts begging to cum, I might consider it. Plus we are hoping to go to the London Fetish Fair soon (it keeps getting put off) so i dont want him to cum before we get there!! Anyway, sorry to bore you all, but the short answer is - its up to you!
     
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  18. gabri34
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    gabri34 Member

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    "and it takes a few weeks for their bodies to acclimatise to the changes in hormones that not cumming causes, so for it to be effective, you need to keep them chaste for a few weeks."

    You think that there is a real difference in hormones after a few weeks ? I don't know too much about it but I guees it might be connected to low level of prolactin after 2/3 weeks and high level of endophines.
     
  19. OwnedByAmy
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    OwnedByAmy Long term member

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    Maybe she's caning or cropping the wrong part of your anatomy? Perhaps a preventive caning or cropping in a different area would help?
     
  20. OwnedByAmy
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    OwnedByAmy Long term member

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    Is that an M200 you're wearing? If that's the same one I have, I know that it can become a bit stimulating after a while without the right lube. Palsmer's cocoa butter for stretch marks works quite well. Perhaps, before resorting to caning, she could make a habit of removong your cage and using numbing cream on you? Just thoughts.
     
  21. OwnedByAmy
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    OwnedByAmy Long term member

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    Your posts are NEVER boring MB! :) Quite enjoyed that one. Amy used to think not letting me cum was mean too, but like you, she's realized it isn't, and after letting me cum at the end of last month, she has decided that allowing me to cum is pointless and counter-productive, so she won't be allowing me to cum at least for several months. She thinks my begging is cute, and no boy begs for a release when he's just had one. ;)
     
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  22. Lady De
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    Lady De Never turning back!

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    I have learned from experience that he takes like 1o days or so to get back in to full service and acceptance of my power over him, including veto in all decisions, not just related to servicing me. In the beginning I was afraid to keep him from release to long, but he has adapted so well to the stepwise increases, and so have I. I like the fact that there is no more drop in service standards and he is so on his toes. I have told him that the timeframe until next release will be indefinitely, - and he did not object, would have been pointless anyhow:)
    I have come to love my power over him, and it seems as if he feeds his kinks with that - as well.
     
  23. OwnedByAmy
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    OwnedByAmy Long term member

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    It's been lots of fun reading your hubby's posts about your journey! And speaking of being on toes, Amy just picked out a pair of 5" heels she wants me to wear. :)
     
  24. Harry Haversackers
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    Harry Haversackers Horny Old Goat

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    I'm not sure I understand. Do you need to have a PA to stay chaste, or is it for her comfort only? A piercing is not only not on the agenda here, but any ideas I've had about one have been shot down in flames.
     
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  25. BlueEyes
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    BlueEyes The lifestyle pumps in my veins...
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    God morning.-) - I can see that my post was not as clear and straight forward as I had hoped. Sorry. It was just a personal observation , that in my case the PA stays on , because she feels comfortable in knowing that I have no way of being able to follow even a slight temptation, - if such a temptation were to occur. - (Which I at this point very much doubt:) )

    She also believes that It is a good for me now the no-release timeframe has been expanded so much, - to make it possible to concentrate fully on my daytime work as art director, - and I''m sure She is right;-)

    It is not on because I need the PA on anymore - to prevent cheating . I believe that I would not try to cheat in anyway, - anymore. I have come to treasure this lifestyle way to much , -and I honor HER deeply , - so I cannot see myself risk to loose any part of this...
    But a small PA stays on - it makes her comfortable:) and fits nicely with the Steelheart tube from Steelworxx.

    She will not - however allow me PIV-sex with the PA on, - so I have the necessary tools at hand, - in case she on rare occasions grants me that pleasure ;-) . It is easily reinserted afterwards...

    And I have not as You seem to face, had any problems in getting a PA, - because I simply did it myself, without her knowledge - way back , long before this wonderful chastity lifestyle was on the agenda. That was when I was "on the dark side of the moon...;-)
    On the sunny side it came in rather handy in the beginning of this lifestyle for us, because I was not so strong in my faith then, as I am now... So for me it was setting my mind to rest, - there was no escape!:)

    I still love my device, - its is smooth, with everything integrated and tucked away. It does not look like a decorated Christmas tree - like other devices with external padlock and PA seems - to me - to look like...

    And it is like a branding, - a constant - heavy - reminder of my position and her control. Nice! And the PA is also - as being part of my "Chastity device unity" - a way of making it a bit easier for me to concentrate on my work , when needed.


    Explained a little better now:) ?
     
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