HouseboyForHer

With the encouragement of a kindred spirit over at bdsmlr, I'm going to invest more time on this forum. So I thought i would re-introduce myself (since a lot has changed, and since I didn't really jump in after that).

I'm currently fully locked up, with the key held by my Wife. For reasons I will try to explain, I "want" to be locked up absolutely 24x7, with exceptions for travel and doctor's visits, and of course for her amusement. Alas, she commands out also in certain situations, most notably cycling outdoors. I wear a Jailbird. Last time I was here, I was struggling and totally frustrated as I tried to make a holy trainer work. The Jailbird, plus a little lube where the ring folds my scrotum up, has made all the difference.

We are engaged in gentle Femdom and as much of an FLR (WLR?) relationship as seems appropriate. She makes all the decisions, or rather, I defer to Her, but we are still very much equals. I help Her with computer stuff, and routinely reminder Her of things she wants to do, or said She would do. I do nearly all the chores, but she often helps me fold laundry.

In addition to being submissive, I have a strong masochistic streak running through me. Certain kinds of pain are a real turn-on. It is not hard to imagine that this is driven by some sort of disgust of self, and indeed I judge myself very harshly - something I am working on.

As is so common, my lovely wife is not naturally a domme. So as is also so common, I am searching for any way to help her feel comfortable making me serve her and suffer for Her. I have not been inside my Wife for perhaps 15 years and our sex life is totally broken, despite our mutual effort to revive it. History: for all those years I was depressed (the medicated kind) and totally frustrated with myself and my life, despite appearances of great success. Around my Wife, I was snarky, grumpy, and a powder keg that was sometimes upset and even frightening Her. Flash forward: I approached her gently, "coming out" about my true, full-time nature of submission. She accepted me, and our FLR and chastity started in September 2021. At the same time, we instituted three rules. (1) Always be nice to my Wife. (2) Always be nice to myself. (3) Respond proportionately - rather than having a tantrum - when bad things happen. She agreed to back this up with corporal punishment. We are very successful in modifying my behavior: I almost always treat her like a Queen, instead of being snotty or snarky or morose. I wear a chastity cage to ensure I don't masturbate while we attempt to resurrect our sex life. This is complicated by neuroses we both have, and a flagging libido She is struggling with. She does see the benefits of chastity, but teasing is not natural for Her. I am 100% committed to encouraging her gently, offering ideas, and being patient, patient, patient. She is in charge. Last orgasm: Oct 11, 2021. The one before that: Dec. 13, 2020.