Do ruined orgasm count against you?

Discussion in 'Chastity and orgasm denial' started by MichaelAlan, Mar 13, 2023.

Random Thread
  1. MichaelAlan
    Offline

    MichaelAlan Long term member

    Joined:
    Aug 1, 2022
    Messages:
    184
    Likes Received:
    68
    Trophy Points:
    28
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    West, way west
    Local Time:
    3:32 PM
    Interesting. We havent experimented enough with the runied Os. I think she stops when I spurt. I'm not sure. Afterwards I feel moderately sasiated but still hard and horny.

    But we will have to wait a while to practice again
     
  2. jemima
    Offline

    jemima maid for my Mistress

    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2011
    Messages:
    12,158
    Likes Received:
    12,999
    Trophy Points:
    153
    Occupation:
    Maid
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    Birmingham
    Local Time:
    8:32 PM
    If your mess has come out then i think it mean you have orgasm.
     
  3. MsPamela
    Offline

    MsPamela Long term member

    Joined:
    Mar 25, 2020
    Messages:
    346
    Likes Received:
    2,708
    Trophy Points:
    123
    Gender:
    Female
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    US
    Local Time:
    3:32 PM
    For a while I had settled on monthly orgasms for hubby (full, not ruined), and that worked well. There was a bit of "drop" after orgasm, but overall it was a good balance (certainly much better than only waiting a week or two between orgasms).

    More recently, I've added ruined orgasms to the mix and the effects have been wonderful. It's just enough relief to make hubby a little less "edgy", but without any "drop" at all. Since there isn't any drop, I don't feel like I have to make him wait an entire month. There really isn't a fixed schedule... just whenever I feel like it. He might get one after a week, or two, or three. I don't keep track.

    On the flip side, the ruined orgasms relieve just enough pressure that I can make hubby go much longer between full orgasms. He waited three months for his last one, and I'll probably make him wait a similar amount of time for his next one. This year, full orgasms are going to be rare and special things. I like that.

    To me, it's the best of both worlds. I can give him a little reward whenever the mood strikes, while still essentially keeping him in perpetual desire.
     
  4. IB-Chaste
    Offline

    IB-Chaste Chastity Superman.

    Joined:
    Jun 20, 2022
    Messages:
    2,870
    Likes Received:
    5,608
    Trophy Points:
    143
    Gender:
    Male
    Local Time:
    8:32 PM
    But does that ruin count? :p

    My wife is pretty much the same. Expects an hour long massage, 30 minutes of oral, some more tickling etc. all before I enter her. (Or did, that doesn’t happen so often now.)
    In return she’d put her hands around my dick for a couple of minutes or suck it until I was ready.
    Now, I crave just the faintest of touch. Just her tongue against my penis. Nights where she just strokes my body and kisses me gently.
    But that isn’t real intimacy, the real intimacy starts when you accept you won’t be receiving those things. Not for a long time. It’s then that you take the time to really understand your partner. That’s why the 90 days (can be) important.
    To break that routine, that habit, that belief that real intimacy lies within sexual encounters.
     
    MichaelAlan likes this.
  5. Jay Sub
    Offline

    Jay Sub Married with Cage

    Joined:
    Jul 21, 2022
    Messages:
    1,790
    Likes Received:
    2,253
    Trophy Points:
    143
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    England - South-East
    Local Time:
    8:32 PM
    Usually happens as I go soft and back in the cage a minute later. Feel a sense of satisfaction but no drop. Ruins are mixed with accidents which aren't punished really, but we are getting better at it.
     
    MichaelAlan likes this.
  6. madams-sissysub
    Offline

    Joined:
    Apr 30, 2009
    Messages:
    12,249
    Likes Received:
    6,633
    Trophy Points:
    143
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    nurse
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    uk (west mids)
    Local Time:
    8:32 PM
    Madam doesn’t count them, the few times I’ve had them she found them to be very amusing.
     
  7. MichaelAlan
    Offline

    MichaelAlan Long term member

    Joined:
    Aug 1, 2022
    Messages:
    184
    Likes Received:
    68
    Trophy Points:
    28
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    West, way west
    Local Time:
    3:32 PM
    My Wife is so externally focused that she wouldn't accept a 5 minute massage and it has taken male chastity and continual begging to get her to allow me to giver her oral at all. But knowimg how much it pleases me and adds to the sexual torment it has been nearly exlusive
     
  8. MichaelAlan
    Offline

    MichaelAlan Long term member

    Joined:
    Aug 1, 2022
    Messages:
    184
    Likes Received:
    68
    Trophy Points:
    28
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    West, way west
    Local Time:
    3:32 PM
    A minute later?? !!! I've been having to spray cold water on myself to get to the point I can put the cage back on
     
  9. MichaelAlan
    Offline

    MichaelAlan Long term member

    Joined:
    Aug 1, 2022
    Messages:
    184
    Likes Received:
    68
    Trophy Points:
    28
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    West, way west
    Local Time:
    3:32 PM
    Ma'am,
    Im reading what the men lose, some angry others depressed, but what do the ladies lose? Is it that desire?

    Attentiveness? Submissivness that is lost if he orgasms too much? How is this lose manifested?
     
  10. MichaelAlan
    Offline

    MichaelAlan Long term member

    Joined:
    Aug 1, 2022
    Messages:
    184
    Likes Received:
    68
    Trophy Points:
    28
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    West, way west
    Local Time:
    3:32 PM
    We're
    Going to say it does ans start all over.

    Does it count on me dropping off or her not moving towards focusing on her own needs?

    Who knows? We'll find out in time what works for us.
     
    IB-Chaste likes this.
  11. littleguy3
    Offline

    littleguy3 Adoring husband

    Joined:
    Apr 26, 2022
    Messages:
    2,606
    Likes Received:
    3,519
    Trophy Points:
    143
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Bondservant to my wife
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    USA - Virginia
    Local Time:
    4:32 PM
    Best of luck! I'm sure you'll keep us updated on your journey!
     
  12. King Hippo
    Offline

    King Hippo Long term member

    Joined:
    May 11, 2020
    Messages:
    2,772
    Likes Received:
    2,757
    Trophy Points:
    143
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    New Jersey
    Local Time:
    4:32 PM
    Q: Do ruined orgasms count against you?

    A: For me, I don't know if any type of orgasm would count against me... but here are some scenarios.

    If you are only allowed to have an "orgasm" at the service or supervision of your keyholder or spouse & you gave yourself an orgasm while wearing a chastity device... it had an orgasm & you broke the rules.

    If you and your keyholder had a hard limit on the maximum amount of time you had to wait to have an orgasm, and the orgasm you had was... "ruined"... I would say the timer is reset and you are back to "Day 1".

    If your keyholder or spouse was edging you and they didn't intend for you to have an orgasm and you ended up having one; even if it wasn't a "good one"... you had an orgasm.

    If a tree falls in the woods & no one was there to see it... did it really fall? If you have sex but you don't have an orgasm... did you really have sex?

    To me, an orgasm is an orgasm... I'd say if a male ejaculates they had an orgasm.
     
    IB-Chaste, MichaelAlan and littleguy3 like this.
  13. MichaelAlan
    Offline

    MichaelAlan Long term member

    Joined:
    Aug 1, 2022
    Messages:
    184
    Likes Received:
    68
    Trophy Points:
    28
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    West, way west
    Local Time:
    3:32 PM
    #63 MichaelAlan, Mar 18, 2023
    Last edited: Mar 18, 2023
    Well Im not talking to mom about it!! Lol
     
    littleguy3 likes this.
  14. MsPamela
    Offline

    MsPamela Long term member

    Joined:
    Mar 25, 2020
    Messages:
    346
    Likes Received:
    2,708
    Trophy Points:
    123
    Gender:
    Female
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    US
    Local Time:
    3:32 PM
    I can't speak for other women, and I probably approach chastity differently from other key holders. But here's my perspective...

    Submissiveness is part of the appeal, but I think the more fundamental issue is that sex is best when everyone is having fun. My definition of sex is quite broad, for example I count hubby going down on me while he remains locked as sex. But even in that lopsided (and frequent) case I enjoy it more when it is clear that hubby is also having fun.

    With monthly orgasms it always felt like there were several days at the start where hubby wasn't very enthusiastic. Then during the second week things really started to kick in, his desire for me was growing, and there was a different sort of energy to our interactions. The third and fourth weeks were perfection. Going much past a month was dicey - it felt like at any point everything might turn negative. So I'd let him have an orgasm and we'd start over again. I'm not complaining. It was a wonderful routine, and essentially the best sex and closest intimacy of our 30+ year marriage.

    But ruined orgasms made it that much better. They keep hubby perpetually in that third week zone. Maximum desire, minimum irritability. I feel loved and cherished, and it is clear that hubby thoroughly enjoys it as well.
     
  15. masohedo
    Offline

    masohedo Long term member

    Joined:
    Feb 23, 2017
    Messages:
    256
    Likes Received:
    333
    Trophy Points:
    63
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Retired
    Local Time:
    3:32 PM
    For us, Ruined ones not only count but are an essential tool to achieve perpetual desire as MsPamela has brilliantly expressed.
    It has been amazing for me how I have been kept without full orgasms for months ,being frequently stimulated in different ways but never getting more than an ocassional ruined orgasm as " a little reward whenever the mood strikes".
    In my case the technique has been mastered to the point that there are the " normal" ruined ones that involve an almost imperceptible flow of semen , considered rewards and with the purpose of granting some relief and the "phantom" ruined ones during which the penis and brain are tricked to have had an orgasm, but absolutely nothing happens, no flow and the physical refraction period kicks in, total flaccidity!! The impact is monumental : the mental desire is there but your equipment has been plugged off . Total frustration!!
     
    MichaelAlan likes this.
  16. MichaelAlan
    Offline

    MichaelAlan Long term member

    Joined:
    Aug 1, 2022
    Messages:
    184
    Likes Received:
    68
    Trophy Points:
    28
    Gender:
    Male
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    West, way west
    Local Time:
    3:32 PM
    #66 MichaelAlan, Mar 22, 2023
    Last edited: Mar 22, 2023
    I appreciate yours and Ms Pamela's perspective. It is nice to hear both sides of the equation. I have been sharing these posts with my Wife so we both can learn from your insight..
     
    masohedo likes this.
  17. Arlentia2
    Offline

    Verified Female

    Joined:
    Apr 22, 2023
    Messages:
    139
    Likes Received:
    345
    Trophy Points:
    63
    Gender:
    Female
    Local Time:
    4:32 PM
    Wait - how does she do that??
     
  18. BavarianWoman
    Offline

    BavarianWoman I rule

    Joined:
    Mar 25, 2023
    Messages:
    2,414
    Likes Received:
    11,447
    Trophy Points:
    143
    Gender:
    Female
    Occupation:
    Reinsurance
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    Munich
    Local Time:
    9:32 PM
    I started an orgasm log for both of us. Don't know about the ruined ones yet.
     
  19. jemima
    Offline

    jemima maid for my Mistress

    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2011
    Messages:
    12,158
    Likes Received:
    12,999
    Trophy Points:
    153
    Occupation:
    Maid
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    Birmingham
    Local Time:
    8:32 PM
    Mistress always telled me that ruined one dose count but when i had them not a lot come out anyways and now i dont have men spurtys anyways no more.
     
    Sexy Slave 69 likes this.
  20. WomenWearTheKeys
    Offline

    WomenWearTheKeys Active member

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2018
    Messages:
    139
    Likes Received:
    418
    Trophy Points:
    73
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Av8r
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    Mountain West, US
    Local Time:
    2:32 PM

    * she asks with intense interest


    Lol
     
    Arlentia2 likes this.
  21. Andylocked
    Offline

    Andylocked Long term member

    Joined:
    Mar 17, 2018
    Messages:
    496
    Likes Received:
    925
    Trophy Points:
    103
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Consultant
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    Netherlands
    Local Time:
    9:32 PM
    I am still of the opinion that it counts against. A ruin requires stimulation to the penis. That stimulation brings pleasure. Bring in edging into the equation - this is actually a LOT of pleasure for the penis in question - just not enough to get to the final FULL climax - but enough pleasure to ensure an ejaculation, but without the nerve endings blowing into the brain. Thus, lots of pleasure involved, cum involved… To me, this basically says a Ruin SHOULD count against.
    There is of course an argument against this which says chastity is chastity - but we are all only here once - do we really want to go through life locked and receiving absolutely NO pleasure?
    Ok, so we don’t get the full sonic boom of a full climax, but a ruin means we are at least getting SOME stimulation - which in itself is good for the mind and the soul!!
    Same with a prostate milking… feels good.. at least good enough to stimulate your brain into telling your body to release those fluids because it feels nice!
    So yeah - it counts against… but to be honest… do we care? Some stimulation and attentiveness from our loved ones is better than the ‘locked and forgotten’ option, yeah?
     
  22. Sherrie’sPleasure
    Offline

    Sherrie’sPleasure Active member

    Joined:
    Apr 3, 2023
    Messages:
    147
    Likes Received:
    170
    Trophy Points:
    53
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Retired
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    Southern USA
    Local Time:
    4:32 PM
    I agree that it counts against… “Stimulation” and Release of sperm.. ruined or otherwise…plain and simple.
     
  23. Sherrie’sPleasure
    Offline

    Sherrie’sPleasure Active member

    Joined:
    Apr 3, 2023
    Messages:
    147
    Likes Received:
    170
    Trophy Points:
    53
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Retired
    Location: (Country, Region - and perhaps even City?):
    Southern USA
    Local Time:
    4:32 PM
    We’ve been keeping score as well… my Goddess is always in control of my Sexuality.
     
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice