What are the long term mental affects from wearing a chastity device?

Discussion in 'Chastity and orgasm denial' started by locked_cuckold, Apr 5, 2019.

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  1. Disciplined Boyfriend
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    Flippant answer is "delicious, a complete mind f*ck"

    Serious answer, you crave release in all sorts of different ways, from trying to hump any object that can press against the cage to wanting to try anal.
     
  2. Lazlo Toth
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    Hilarious reply Boisub.

    I’m amused when losers call me a looser.
     
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  3. captivatedbyher
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    captivatedbyher romantic want to be

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  4. captivatedbyher
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    captivatedbyher romantic want to be

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    This is new? This is a kink? Maybe the flavor you enjoy is new and kinky but chastity has been around for ages! The catholic church has for a long time pushed chastity big time!

    A few things I have noticed as the months keep rolling over with my old friend locked up is:
    1: I'm far less selfish in bed
    2: feeling much more romantic
    3: learned to respect women more
    4: I've become far less lusty
    5:I want to spend time with my wife more

    Many many little things, see for yourself, be brave! Lock it up and go a year or five!
     
  5. SubSnuggler
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    SubSnuggler Owned by Mistress2and4you

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    Your mention of chastity in religious vocations of the past makes me wonder.

    Who did it better? Nuns, or monks?

    Once again it's immediately obvious Women are better at things. Sigh.
     
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  6. Deleted member 69497
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    I don't know that "research" has to be limited to those of us who wear devices. I think some of the effects of the long term no-fap and semen retention crowds can apply. Having been members of those groups on and off I can confirm some similarities with the respondents in this thread.

    - A more outward focus
    - More observant of others needs (I would say in the bedroom and outside, as well.)
    - Less interest in short term gratification
    - A shift to more "romantic" view of intimacy (e.g., "I don't care if I get off, but I'd pay a fortune just to feel or connect with someone.")

    That's not to say it's bliss or that it's a spiritual awakening for everyone.

    2-3 weeks without an orgasm is a rough time for me due to anxiety and general "crankiness". It drops off and after 30-45 days, I definitely start to feel some of the above changes. Like too much masturbation, cumming after 6 months without an orgasm is depressing as hell and obsessive thoughts start all over again.

    Everyone is different, as has been said so saying there is no effect because you haven't felt one may be a bit of a broad stroke.
     
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  7. true42
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    true42 Owned member

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    Maybe they should have required a PA and a cage ... :rolleyes:
     
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  8. captivatedbyher
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    captivatedbyher romantic want to be

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    They just didn't think of it :)
     
  9. Monkey boi
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    Totally endorse your post , l belong to my k/h love and adore her .
     
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  10. Tom Allen
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    The context, to me, was obviously referring to long term locking in a device with orgasm denial; not to the religious or spiritual practice.

    This is why I maintain that "chastity devices" are really sex toys.
     
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  11. CuriousHetero
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    CuriousHetero 18 years pussy-free.

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    I would love to achieve this!
     
  12. JaySaysYes
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    JaySaysYes I identify as someone that is always right

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    I gradually experienced longer and longer continuous locks (between the key in the lock), up to 120 days.

    I've been cage free for a week, but in the last year I have had very little cage free time as my KH really wanted to do a long continuous lock but life just kept interrupting.

    My D worked fine after 4 months of no erections. It was 1cm shorter (from 17.9cm), but that was the same after doing 70 days and it returned after a coiple of weeks. It was sore, especially after she played with it without any kind of oil. It ached a little but that has now gone.

    While caged I was insanely horny. Since being released I had one accidental ejaculation (wich felt like nothing) while we made love. I tried to stop it but failed. Being uncaged I am not horny.

    Literally, I feel almost nothing. I suspect it's due to the cage being a stumulant and now it's gone I am in some kind of dead zone. I suspect the cage will go back on before I return to nornal.

    I am very surprised and relieved that everything still works.

    Mental effects? Not much.

    I loved the experienceand so did she. I think it made her feel much sexier, I certainly felt like I had more desire for her.

    She had hoped to get to the point where I wouldn't want to masturbate but I think that would take longer than 4 months. She hads threatened to do six months next, which I think will turn into 9 months, but we'll see.

    I still want to masturbate, still want to watch porn, I still do most of the cooking, and I still earn most of the money, and I still make most of the big decisions.

    I wish it had worked to expel the porn and masturbation demon but it hasn't.

    I definitely don't wish to experience a full orgasm again, and I believe I was beginning to feel different having gone so long without ejaculating so I'd like to know what zero ejaculations might be like over a longer period, say a year.

    We're not into any of the other stuff, we just really enjoy her deciding when I get an erection or orgasm, and she dislikes me masturbating so it works for us. We're both early 50s.

    Maybe this might give some boost to those guys out there that want to try long locks but have fears about shrinking and erectile dysfunction. I'm not saying you won't experience those, just that in my experience I didn't get it, and now I feel that if she said we were doing 9 months I think I'd feel okay about the physical aspects of it.
     
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  13. Stephplayswithyou
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    Stephplayswithyou Long term member

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    @JaySaysYes , thank you for sharing this, it does give one a boost to hear about others experiences with longer term lockups. This is a goal of ours as well, for similar reasons as to your situation. I'm curious to know, you said she had hoped the 4 months would've made you not want to masturbate, as did you. Do you wish you would've remain locked longer until you felt perhaps, you did kick that desire? Or is that where you plan to go next, is that even longer lock up?
     
  14. PurpleShadowSub
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    Few on a dedicated chastity forum will agree with me, but the honest answer is nothing happens, it's just a bit of fun.

    If the other things people mentioned happens to them it's because they want it that way and is all part of their fantasy, which is absolutely fine.
     
  15. IB-Chaste
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    IB-Chaste Chastity Superman.

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    Yeah I wouldn’t agree.
    I understand your view point. It can just the a bit of kinky fun. Bit of denial. Enhance the sexual aspect upon release.

    It’s how it’s approached. I’ll give you just one example from my life.
    Prior to chastity I was pretty good at helping around the house. I would do it. It would feel like I’m doing a chore… the reward would be a better sex life as my wife tells me she ‘would feel far more willing to do stuff if she’s not too tired from work and all the housework”.
    Now locked up I know there will be no reward. However, the tasks no longer feel like a chore, there’s a constant connection/reminder that your actually being better for someone else.

    You stated that it’s because ‘they want it that way’ so I’m under the impression your discussing whilst caged.
    Do I believe uncaged I’d be as proactive towards my wife’s needs over the long term? No? Is that relevant? Probably not, she won’t be releasing me any time soon.

    There is fun to be had in chastity. There’s also more.
    I do agree that there is no “long term” effect. I don’t believe in the 90 days to change habits etc.
    Like @JaySaysYes points out. It didn’t curb his masturbation.
     
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  16. JaySaysYes
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    I do wish we had continued.

    I was feeling some changes after not ejaculating for so long and I was disincentivised to ejaculate with the cage on as it causes a lot of discomfort - and I now have a better appreciation for the idea ejaculation is not orgasm.

    It was difficult for her too. She loves my cock and us having sex, and all of the fun things, and she found non-reciprocal sex difficult. She also really enjoyed the attention though.

    I believe there are long term effects of a long continuous and uninterrupted chastity lock, but I think for every man the length of time locked is different. Perhaps a guy in his 30s would be utterly transformed after 4 months locked, but for someone my age perhaps much longer is needed.

    I imagine that one day soon she will decide the cage is going back on and that it stays on for a longer time. I have mixed feelings about it because on the one hand I enjoyed it and I want the effects, but on the other hand it was one of the most difficult things I have done and I really missed erections.
     
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    You can still have reciprocal sex in chastity play. I wear a delay release condom and ensure mentally that nothing happens, then after she's happy the cage goes back on. It's actually truly frustrating and I often find it difficult to relax and settle down afterwards
     
  18. JaySaysYes
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    JaySaysYes I identify as someone that is always right

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    I was referring to the cage staying on for months at a time without the use of the key.
     
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    Long term chastity has caused definite changes in my attitude which have already been mentioned in this thread. These changes seem to have been exacerbated when I started taking high blood pressure medication. This hindered my ability to maintain an erection which made PIV sex an impossibility. This additional emasculation has sent me further down a submissive rabbit hole which my wife has fully embraced.
     
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    Your description describes my situation. I feel incomplete when I'm not wearing my cage. When I unlock to shower and clean my bits and the cage or when I have medical appointments and have to remove my cage, the first thing that I do when I get home is to immediately relock myself. I feel incomplete and empty when not wearing my cage.
     
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    Five years caged 24/7 and we are still lovers but more so in every category, even told my urologist, wants to put our experience in a book he is writing lol!​
     
  22. Jay Sub
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    Jay Sub Married with Cage

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    Don't be a tease, we all get enough of that. Where's the rest of the story? It invites.so many questions. A book on urology? What part of your experience relates to that? What and how much does he know?

    I've mentioned to my doctor, in a roundabout way, that I practice orgasm denial to some degree, as I had to rule it out as a possibility of some symptoms I was experiencing. I think it is important that we share anything that might even possibly be of clinical interest. "Coming less often, sometimes only every couple of weeks" was how I put it. Had he probed more I would have gone further, but he didn't think it was relevant.
     
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    Five years since she accepted the key worn on her anklet which lights my fire, now at 70 plus I can report all systems are go, and love making when permissible has never been better, princess loves my new self, me too.
     
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    For us, chastity also coincided with starting a FLR. It is difficult to tell whether the changes have resulted from wearing the device, or her control.

    She teased and denied me prior to chastity. The cage does add to the intensity and she tends to tease me more when locked. She likes me to be desperate and the cage is a reminder.

    The combination of her dominance, teasing, and the cage has resulted in quite a few changes in our relationship, and all good.

    The greatest change is I am far more focused on her.
     
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  25. littleguy3
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    Chastity in and of itself for a long duration likely doesn't have much affect on your brain & mind. It requires a corresponding shift in practice & behaviors. If you had a good sex life before & after chastity with similar frequencies of physical intimacy and orgasms, not much is going to change.

    But for those who were affected by porn & masturbation, had poor / no physical intimacy with their partner, and/or struggling with ED / PIED, and then found new sources of stimulation, significant increases in physical intimacy and/or sensuality all while remaining chaste (caged or not), a rewiring of the brain does happen but it takes time.

    Therapists who work with patients struggling with sexual addictions / compulsions / habits recommend a 30-60 day abstinence period from any sexual activity in order to reset your brain. They want you to become a more sensual person (non-sexual) and develop new practices that produce healthy amounts of dopamine and oxytocin in your life. The addiction / compulsion does not resolve itself in that short a period of time. They say it takes 3-5 years to overcome the affects of long-term habits that have created permanent neural pathways in your brain. I think that process can be accelerated for some under the right conditions.

    I've had several lengthy lock-up periods since I started this back in January. The longest was 90 days. I have noticed a marked decrease in the urge to masturbate (my 55 year addictive habit). At first, I noticed strong urges to pleasure myself when feelings of exhaustion, depression or negative emotions hit me. It was then that I realized I had a problem. Especially when my amygdala overrode my frontal lobe one day and I couldn't resist using a vibrator on myself. But those urges hit me with far less frequency now. I notice when those trigger emotions hit me and now marvel when the urge to masturbate doesn't follow closely behind.

    I didn't observe a 30-60 day abstinence period from any sexual activity as recommended. I discussed it with my wife and she felt that would be a penalty for her and she had felt neglected for soooo many years that she didn't want to forego my affections. And she has been very regular in her physical teasing / stimulation of me so that my brain has been rewired to find my pleasure from her touch (far superior to solo sex / teasing) and from her pleasure. Most urges that strike me are for her play with my nipples. And I'm now experiencing post-orgasm oxytocin surges when she experiences an orgasm. That's clearly a mental effect associated with our chastity dynamic and intimacy practice.

    Like a drug addict, I'm told that the desire to masturbate and/or look at porn will never go away completely. The neural pathways that were created are permanent. So we can slip back into old practices easily if we go there. But that's much less likely if we have new, healthy and highly utilized neural pathways have been engrained.

    I created a poll to see how many people on this site who practice chastity also continue to view porn. I was really surprised that it was about 85-90%. This really puzzled me because I lost the desire to view porn since I couldn't follow through with pleasuring myself while caged. But I've come to realize that those who grew up in the internet age have a much deeper struggle with porn than I do. But I'm careful now not to wander places that are going to trigger desires to pleasure myself, so I rarely open the "captions" thread or similar. I'm so satisfied with loving my wife / KH and enjoy her so much that I don't want anything to detract me from that pursuit. It's too good to ever risk going back to life before chastity.
     
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