Thoughts On Teasing

Discussion in 'Chastity in vanilla life' started by Guest 6019, Jul 26, 2021.

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  1. Guest 6019
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    Guest 6019 Long term member

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    I wrote this a few weeks ago and showed it to my wife today to help her understand what my ideal tease might be like. Tonight I licked her till she unlocked me, then I was allowed inside her for about a minute or two, then forced back into my cage without relief. I love this perfect lady.

    The perfect tease.

    Please take your time to read this, it took at least a week to write. It's not a criticism, as I think you are getting really good at it, and some of these thoughts are inspired by things you do or have done anyway. I just really wanted to share my thoughts on something I was thinking and fantasizing about. I was thinking of sharing it as a post for feedback and other ideas. Here goes:

    A great tease is like a joke. The set-up, the punchline and then the follow ups. A bit of a rhetorical questioning works for instance;

    "I bet you really desperate to get my property out of your cage?"...

    In the bedroom this could be followed by some cruel (read lovely) teasing with the key and some cage rattling maybe. Holding the key near your pussy which I can possibly just glimpse through some beautiful sheer lace panties, letting me contemplate what is beneath them for a while, what you are possibly going to deny me is so hot. Or when I'm kissing you down there, even hotter.

    "Should I?"....
    "Hmm?"...
    "But I do like you locked and desperate"...
    "And I'm not sure if my 'little' thing deserves to come out"...
    (See SPH below)
    "maybe if you....?" (Do something for you)

    Then, right when you see the desperate ache in my eyes...

    "Well that's not happening! I want you to be more desperate for me"... Or
    "I'm sorry...No...Not tonight, it hasn't been quite long enough yet"

    In the bedroom it's the perfect time to just let go. If I've been let out for a bit of edging, making me stuff it back in at this point really makes me feel amazingly submissive devoted to you. I loved it the other day, after I put the cage on, and you forced it down until the lock lined up. "Click" In my head it reinforced the control you have and I melted before your sexual superiority.

    "Not for a long time"...

    "Especially if you don't please me!"

    "So...Maybe never"


    This all works on so many levels. First part draws attention to my predicament, and that my manhood is for you, not me. Let's me know you are thinking about Little J, even if you don't need him, and makes him think he might be getting out.
    Then the punchline. Little J reels in feigned protest and pumps some happy hormones into my brain.

    Then the kickers. The first putting doubt as to how long, turns it up a notch.

    The second reminds me of my place and what is at stake if I'm not a good attentive husband, with a suggestive twist that you still might require sexual satisfaction and my release may be dependent on whether I provide you that buzz or not.

    Then the burn..."So...Maybe never!" Which dials the verbal tease up to 11. I don't think I want to never be released, but the danger of it being a possible outcome is a huge turn on. What if...

    The great thing is that any part, or even just one of them work great on their own. There are just certain triggers that work. Words like "Desperate", "longing", "tight" etc...
    "Small, little, cute" I am really turned on by a bit of light SPH (small penis humiliation) when it is locked, though strangly (or obviously?) not when it's out. For instance:
    "It looks so cute in that little cage, I think you need the smaller one, put it on!"
    "Shall I let it out of that tiny cage, so it can get bigger"

    "Beg me to keep you locked...Or I'm never unlocking you."

    Describe your perfect vanilla tease.
     
  2. LesterBallard
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    LesterBallard Long term member

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    so how did it work out for you and your wife?
     
  3. Guest 6019
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    She wants to get better at teasing, but says when it comes to it, she often draws a blank. She doesn't like captions with other women in, and pictures are easily found with teenagers around, so we have agreed I will make a text file of lots of different ones I like, and hide it on her phone. Then she can lucky dip them. This will help reduce the time she needs to think about it, which as a busy working full-time mum is tricky, and makes eventually learning to do this with ease possible.
     
  4. madams-sissysub
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    I can see you put a lot of thought in to it!
     
  5. Marc Anderson
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    Hmmm, just putting this out there. If you are chaste FOR your wife, then maybe you shouldn’t be dictating (suggesting) how she should approach this. It seems like the teasing is for your benefit and not hers. I say this because I’ve been through a similar scenario until I realized that my suggestions were contrary to why we started this in the first place. Now….I keep my mouth shut no matter how long it’s been since our last “adventure”. Circumstances being what they are, I’m going on 4 weeks - each weekend she promises that we’ll do something the following weekend. All I do is profess my love for her.

    Just food for thought…
     
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  6. Turma
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    Turma Long term member

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    If the locked one tells the keyholder what you want, something is going wrong anyway.

    Yes, in the beginning we had that, but together. We watched porn, read texts, looked at captions and tried them out.

    But with us it's been like that for a long time now, it's just "come here" and what comes next, I don't know.

    However, teasing is still a tool for her when she wants me to get horny. No matter if it's for milking, frustration or if necessary a strapon or even a handjob.
     
  7. Guest 6019
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    We are both still finding our way with all if this. Without MY suggestions, without MY topping from the bottom, this wouldn't even be heading toward a more FLR type relationship, and I would be masturbating most days still and probably heading toward divorce.

    Slowly but surely, as my wife gains confidence, she is taking more and more control which is the end goal, but not always where we are in the moment.

    I know you mean well, but a "You are doing it all wrong" reply is myopic, and really unhelpful. If you want to analyse our dynamic, take a look at my pretty much warts and all journal. This is a journey and we can't expect to teleport to our destination in one second. Journey's take time. There are hills and vallies.

    Our relationship is stronger, communication improved and improving, and I am able to discuss my fantasies, in a way I wasn't before.
    What's wrong with that?
    In the end it's her decision whether she does something or not. And, in my topping, I make that very clear to her. As time goes on she gets better at putting herself first, with my encouragement.

    Chastity is not a one-way street for most people. If the sub (and I use that term loosely for me,.as I am more of a chaste knight to my queen) isn't getting something from it, then it's not going to work.

    My wife wants me to point her in the right direction, show her the odd article. She doesn't go looking for advice on her own. Eventually we will get there.
     
  8. Wishful Husband
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    Man does this sound like my situation. We are currently trying to find a happy medium between my trying to "top from the bottom" and her finding her feet in all of this. The hope is that at some point my wife/KH and I will find that balance, but right now we lean a little more towards me topping from the bottom, even if she has the keys.
     
  9. Guest 6019
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    Fucking hell man....Don't admit that here...The right on police will be on us by teatime.
     
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  10. Wishful Husband
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    I'm new enough I don't know yet. I'll claim ignorance. That and that it's my wife's and my life to live how we please! ;)
     
  11. Guest 6019
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    It takes time for her to adjust, and I'm the only person able to guide her on a path that neither really envisaged.

    Knowing now, what I know about how my behaviour can change, for the better, if she really limits my orgasms.

    And, taking in to consideration the reset time after orgasm.

    If I'm honest with her, I should only be allowed a full orgasm every 3 to 4 weeks. Otherwise the amount of time in subspace, which is where she sees the most benefit, is too short compared to time not focused in her. (76-82% with a 5 day reset, 85-89% with 3 day extra teasing reset ) See my maths in my journal.

    https://www.chastitymansion.com/for...-started-to-get-real.42007/page-3#post-478424

    Then it is a balancing act with how much of the more obedient me she wants, and how much penetrative sex she wants, with her goal of us coming together. Or is she willing to sacrifice some of that for other methods of getting off, whenever she wants to keep me enchanted.

    I've said that I want to be in that subspace for her as much as possible, as that's what she deserves.

    She is closer to understanding the full implications and benefits of longer denial. And, when she does process it properly, it's gonna be up to her to set the pace she wants. (She mostly does now) And the fact is that it I in her best interests to deny me for longer,.and even though I'm shooting myself in the nutsack, I owe her the truth.

    I wish it were otherwise, I loved wanking, I was really very proficient at it. But I'm better off without.
     
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