So how do you spoil your Keyholder?

Discussion in 'Female led relationships' started by GoodBoyID, May 3, 2021.

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  1. GoodBoyID
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    GoodBoyID Lady E's sub & servant

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    Hey there beautiful KHs, and brothers in Arms, subs.
    So we are in this lifestyle for over 3 months and I feel a lack of ideas. While massaging, chores and cooking for her become a standard, I am looking for more ideas of ways to spoil her on daily basis, and on special occasions.
    So please, share with me your knowledge.
    Do you have routines or special stuff you doing for your KH (or your subs those for you)?

    It is important for me to emphasize that I am not talking about sexual stuff since that is my KH to decide.
    Thank you, you beautiful community members!


    upload_2021-5-3_18-34-55.jpeg
     
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  2. cagedfellow
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    cagedfellow Long term member

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    Organise a birthday party, bring flowers, get a garden with vegetable, but one thing all, listening about what she can complain about, not necesserely about you but about other things. Grab some and do something about it.
     
  3. GoodBoyID
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    GoodBoyID Lady E's sub & servant

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    List Is a great idea! I will sure try it. might you have any ideas that are obvious to you that I am not thinking of?
     
  4. Xileh
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    Xileh Happily Serving

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    Just listen. Listen to what she says and doesn’t say. She is telling you what she likes every day.

    Not all women want to be endlessly pampered. I think it can feel awkward for her. It is often the little things you can do that mean the most like keeping the bed sheets and bath towels clean. Warming her bed before she turns in. Perhaps just once a week, like the end of her work week, you can do something really special.

    Have fun!
     
  5. lockedbySue
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    lockedbySue Active member

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    I recently, out of the blue, stopped by to get her a shaved ice, which she really likes as a cool treat. I walked in with it and she was so pleased she grabbed my crotch and said "these little tributes make me like the cage even more" Not expensive or trouble to provide, but it showed my focus is on making her happy.
     
  6. madams-sissysub
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    very similar here! But it’s iced coffee for my madam, I will text her if I am going to be passing the coffee shop, and ask her if she wants one,
    It’s not always a yes, but she likes the attentiveness of it.
     
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  7. true42
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    true42 Owned member

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    In addition to my various responsibilities, my wife enjoys:
    • Feeling respected by me
    • Feeling desired by me, but desired in a respectful manner
    • Knowing that I am carefully considering her feelings and preferences when I make decisions
    • Being included in any decision that I need to make that she would want to be involved in (in this case, it's something that I'm responsible for, and she doesn't want to have the responsibility for the decision, but wants her chance to weigh in, and of course I will lovingly respect her wishes)
    • Receiving (or finding) loving notes from me
    • Feeling appreciated for the things that she does, whether those things are for me, or for others, or for herself
    I'm not great at all of these, but I am consciously working on them, because I can see the joy that it brings her.
     
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  8. DoesasTold
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    DoesasTold Long term member

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    The last few days I decided it would be a good idea to give her a foot rub before I leave for work. She is still in bed when I leave.

    After the first day I did it I asked her if she enjoyed and said “Yes, I wish it was longer.” The second day I did it longer and she said “it was so nice but I was hoping you’d grabbed some lotion too”. Well you can bet the next day I did and will continue to do so as long as she likes it. :)
     
  9. true42
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    true42 Owned member

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    "These are a few of her fa-vorite things ...."

    I'll just say, this is where most of our "lotion budget" goes to
     
  10. DoesasTold
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    DoesasTold Long term member

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    I was just told when I got home from work that I accidentally massaged the same foot twice this morning! Apparently she rolled over after I did the first foot and naturally went to the other side to do that foot but it was the same foot! She said “it’s ok, you’ll get it right tomorrow.
     
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  11. true42
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    true42 Owned member

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    (I just finished rubbing her feet this morning. What a treat for me! I get so addicted to things like this now. She has made me into a freaking puppy.)

    Another idea that I wanted to share: A hair brush. No, not for beatings (although I suppose that would work too, if you're into that kind of thing ) but for brushing hair. She loves her hair being brushed. Without asking. So I keep one handy now. Not some cheap brush, but real boars hair, some special kind that I can't remember. Anyhow, it totally relaxes and soothes her to have her hair brushed. And while I'm doing it, she knows that I'm totally focused on her, which she loves. It's definitely in our "top three" now (back rubs, foot rubs, hair brushing).
     
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  12. jemima
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    jemima maid for my Mistress

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    i think lots of Ladies like that.
     
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  13. LockitMan
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    LockitMan Lifestyle service submissive/slave/sissy maid

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    For one Mistress I've been seeing for several months now I constantly give foot rubs, even through entire movies. And she likes it hard. She also has me brush and braid her hair. And brush her whole body with a kind of horse brush or "body brush" as I think they're called.
    These are some of her favorite things, and mine too.
    She also likes me cooking a special dinner to share.

    The other mistress likes for me to cook elaborate things with her, doing all the prep work and all of the cleanup.

    She also has an arthritic neck and likes my neck massages. She says that with all the pills they give her it's the only thing that actually gets rid of the pain. And I couldnt be happier knowing that. Sends me right over the moon! Talk about useful service!
     
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  14. true42
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    true42 Owned member

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    First I've heard of this. Time to do some research ...
     
  15. Xileh
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    Xileh Happily Serving

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    I spent a lot of time listening to her and paying attention. These are the things I do during the week to make her happier (pamper). These things are not negotiated, they are things I watch for and pick up on. I have learned that some things she likes to do herself so I don’t interfere. It is a lot of work. Here is an incomplete list - subject to change:
    1. Listen more. Don’t interrupt. This is probably the hardest of all.
    2. Leg and foot massages every night.
    3. Professional level full body massages on demand. I did research, learned, purchased a table and supplies.
    4. Pedicures and polish. I learned online.
    5. Back rubs in the middle of the night if she wakes up and can’t go back to sleep.
    6. Back rubs in the morning.
    7. House cleaning.
    8. Cleaning the kitchen every night. Unload dishes when done.
    9. Some cooking. She likes to cook so I fill in.
    10. Laundry. Wash, sort, fold, and put away. Polish her shoes.
    11. Professionally detail her car as needed. Washed every week.
    12. Make sure her car is always maintained.
    13. Make sure her decks and patio are always cleaned and ready to enjoy.
    14. Landscaping perfect.
    15. Her bed and sleep shirt is always warm before bed.
    16. Bed sheets and bath towels are always clean and made up.
    17. Happy hour each night with snack and paired wine.
    18. Plan all trips away.
    19. When dining out, she chooses her seating first.
    20. Pleasure on demand.
    21. Many, many more.
     
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  16. NZSenator
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    NZSenator Long term member

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    One of my favourite things is to wash Mrs Sen in the shower, especially after sex, whether or not I'm allowed an orgasm / PIV.

    I drop to my knees and carefully clean her from neck to toe, light massaging while I'm at it. Truely puts me in subservient head space and is tremendous bonding experience.

    Outside of that, the little things -

    As others have said, listen and pay attention for cues about things that may make her life easier / more enjoyable.

    I find that I don't have to do all the chores myself, but being there and talking whilst sharing the work (cooking / washing up) is an important element of our relationship.

    Making sure the outside of the house is ok (lawns cut)

    Talking though our finances regularly (I do all the day to day bits with the accounts, bill payments etc, but she likes to keep informed on where we are at).

    Intimacy is also up there, whether its playful bum/boob gropes, passionate kissing, simply holding her hand when watching TV or some other form of intimate but not leading to sex type of touching, making her feel loved and lusted after
     
  17. true42
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    true42 Owned member

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    ... stealing this!
     
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  18. Xileh
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    Xileh Happily Serving

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    The most important of all.
     
  19. Peaches
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    Peaches "kinky guy"

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    All of the above

    I'll add that I don't get to do these things for Mrs. J only my wife Mrs. T.

    But both ladies have gift wishlist. Amazon and other places. After our monthly get together I buy them each a gift. Mrs. T gifts are vanilla. Mrs. J likes kinky gifts.
     
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  20. SmallRyan
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    SmallRyan Active member

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    I've spent my own money on massage training. I can please her with a variety of expert massages now.

    I enjoy buying shoes for her too. Something she encourages lol. She must have close to 100 pairs now. Certainly over 50.
     
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  21. Tracker1
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    Tracker1 Active member

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    One of my concentrations is date night. I spend time researching all the special shows and openings and exhibits, etc. in our city. Once I have my eye on something I think about inviting one or more of her friends to accompany us.
     
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  22. CaramelMochaBoss
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    CaramelMochaBoss Caramel skin. Likes to be boss in bed.
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    Nice ^_^
    Well done guys!
     
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  23. Xileh
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    Xileh Happily Serving

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    This is a great start. She will enjoy a special evening. Focus on her and leave the electronics turned off. Seriously.

    What do you do the rest of the time? This is when you can show her how serious you are. It is the everyday things that you can do for her, when done consistently, will demonstrate you are committed to serving her. Little things count.

    Yes, it is hard work. This is your opportunity to show her; it is not what she can do to you, it is what you can do for her.
     
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  24. gary170
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    gary170 Long term member

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    Cook which I enjoy clean also enjoy and most importantly love her ....best wife ever very happy husband
     
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  25. Tracker1
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    Tracker1 Active member

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    Of course I listen. I listen a lot. Our relationship is slightly different from most here. I am not told what to do. There is no list of chores. I have to figure out what ought to be done entirely on my own. If I have to ask she will tell me, but I know I get no points -- no closer to a release -- for doing anything that I was too dumb to see the need for. The rationale is that I get released when my KH feels I have demonstrated an enduring commitment, both to her and to our marriage, over time, and figuring out what she would like without being told is one way of expressing those commitments. So I keep my eyes open and I listen. All the time. For instance, when she shows interest in a topic I make a mental note of that and research it, so that the next time it comes up we can have a real conversation.
     
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