Hello, Just started chastity few months ago... Wife feels 14 days is very long... I really desire 30 days on 1 or 2 days off, until she can feel more comfortable with longer times like 6 months to a year. She is afraid my already small penis may shrink too much if I am caged too long. She still wants to have intercourse, but I am pleasing her very often orally and with toys while caged. Maybe I can convince her to lessen intercourse.
If she is worried about you shrinking and you want to remain locked almost all day/night, you could ask her to allow you to edge for 10-20 minutes per day, or something similar, to keep the erectile tissue healthy.
Thanks for advice... I will let her know. She may be for that idea. Personally I would like to keep shrinking but trying to keep wife happy also... She does role play having a lover, using her dildo, with me watching, but said is only for fantasy...
Any shrinkage will rebound in a few days of unlocking. I’d try to negotiate you always being locked with the understanding that she can have you any time she wants and that you will always be 100% ready for her. It’s also difficult to get used to sleeping in it if you have unlocked nights which set you back. You can use some numbing spray under a condom if she wants sex without you cumming.
Very much so. Any loss comes back readily, everything down there is very adaptable to change and unless you are doing HRT or something should not be permanent. Your first time out in a while it is not going to look very impressive, lol. Additionally, you guys could keep a schedule or something like that. At this time on this day of the week you get let out, maybe teased a little, but let out for shaving and hygiene before locking back up.
Just ask. By that I mean tell her your wish to stay locked longer. Make sure she has to he keys and understands she can unlock you anytime, but that you would like to be re locked as soon as she is through with you. That conversation worked for me, and I am now locked 24/7. Most times now I orgasm while locked from her jerking my cage. There is just enough stimulation on the head to give me a ruined orgasm. She rarely unlocks me. I also provide I esl and use a strapon on her, she REALLY likes that.good luck
If you have PIV sex she should notice that you get harder and a bit bigger after each session of lockup as long as you aren't allowed to orgasm. Ever. (Okay, maybe on special occasions.) And if she appreciates that then maybe she'll keep you locked longer for her own benefit.
Try to focus in what she wants, not what you want. The cage should be to keep her property safe. Sounds like you want the cage to keep her out, I can imagine that will cause issues.
Thank you all for your responses. Numbing spray is a great idea. And I will work on asking about longer lockup and scheduling small release windows. I definitely don't want to keep the wife out, but I enjoy the cage and security feelings. But, it is her property... And what she wants is most important. Take care...
Do not try to tell her what she wants let her decide what to do to her penis in the end she is in charge
How many 14 day stretches have you done? If just one or two, sometimes boundaries are best expanded gradually. It's her call, her choice: she's the one holding the keys, and she's doing you a great favor by allowing you to be locked up, and agreeing to participate. She should have unfettered access any time, for her own use. If you go fourteen days, maybe suggest fifteen, or sixteen, or make it into a game. Try something simple, like dice. There are plenty of variations. You must roll two 1''s to be let out. If not, then a single roll of the dice is the number of days more you must remain in. Something like that. Every day after, you roll for two 1's, but if you don't get them, you have to stay in until the sentence is up. On the last day, roll 1's. If you don't get them, roll a single dice again. Increase devotion; increase service. If you were going overboard before, double it; make it clear that being locked has an overwhelming effect on your devotion and service. Kill her with kindness, worship, love, and of course service. The old saying that no one cares how much you know until they know how much you care, always rings true. Unless you're Kim Jong Un, in which case you don't care how much anyone cares. But for everyone else, the proof is in the doing, and if you show that you're happy, healthy, and eager to please, it will have the greatest traction and mileage in making your case. She's the judge and jury, so all you can do is make that case, and if she says no, perhaps plead one extra day. If you expand each time by a day or two, you will get there. The ox is slow, they say, but the road is patient. Be the road.
You MUST make her understand that you desire her and always want inside her. Women's first instinct will be to feel undesired. The biggest problem you will have is that you will cum way to fast after being locked but the numbing spray can help with that.
Your question broke down for me when I read "How to convince wife..." After that part I knew you were in trouble.
To me, shrinkage is a myth and even after a 120 day lockup I resumed my normal size in a few days. At my age I do need ED medication and my first hard erection was hard, full, and like we both remembered. My two cents, be careful what you wish for. My original schedule was 7 or 14 days and it was a good period of confinement. The good (and bad) news is my wife only likes my cock, the bad news is she is bi. We started to observe Locktober and Lent and those 30 or 40 day periods were pushing the envelop for me. I did get a pegging or a milking that help relieved some of the stress. She on the other hand had all the oral and strapon sex she could get from either me or her GF. I was forced into a 100 day total lockup because of a misunderstanding and remember climbing the walls. After everything was resolved my wife went back to the 7 and 14 day schedule. Last year we observed Locktober and we had some bets and contests with 2 other couples and I lost. I ended up in a 120 day lockup and at day 75 was climbing the walls. My wife took pity on me and gave me a few caged orgasms until the final release. Now she would like to try for a 6 month lockup but with caged orgasms as I reach certain milestones and some other criteria. We are a loving couple and spend several night during the week in the hot tub cuddling, the summers are spent outside by our pool. Because of the privacy we can be naked and enjoy ourselves, her totally naked and me wearing a cage. Now some people here have gone longer times and I commend them for their dedication, but I do enjoy sex and orgasms. I remember back when it was for a few days and I wanted longer and she pushed it to a week. then 2 weeks, then a month, now longer periods. Personally, I would take whatever she gives and be thankful for her involvement. There are many people out there and even on here who wish their wife of GF would participate.
Thomas, Thank you for sharing such details,. Maybe I should be greatful for her participation as you say. My goal is to ensure her pleasure and my tiny clit deserves to be locked up. I also have some minor ED issues and cannot perform PIV at times and we rely on a large dildo she truly loves and I am sure prefers and my oral skills. She has mentioned getting an erotc massage, perhaps one day in the future. So a chance she may dip her toe into that area which we have role played hundreds of times. For now if she wants 14 days, I will be locked for 14 days... I do not want to top from the bottom. She did mention that she will extend when she is unhappy with me on chores or something else. And we already do weekly maintenance spankings... But you are right be careful what you wish for... Baby steps for us. I will ask if she wants to join or read posts here as well. But doubt she will, since she is private and not even a FB page.