So I've had the chastity fantasy for a long time now and found my opportunity to make it happen. My wife knows I have a habit of watching porn, and was sure she didn't like it. So I proposed the idea of a chastity cage and told her all she had to do was keep the key and she said "ok." That alone really excited me! I knew this wouldn't be an easy sell because she is very submissive and mostly vanilla. I didn't push the issue after that. A couple weeks went by and I couldn't hold it in any longer. So one night I said "I thought you were going to lock me in chastity so I couldn't watch porn?" I said it kind of jokingly but eager for an answer. She said " Well I thought you were going to give me the key?" I sort of laughed and asked her if she really wanted the key and she replied "Yes." So I let a few more days go by and decided to lock myself up and hand it over. I handed them to her and she said "Oh ok." The excitement inside me was intense because I knew it was now for real! She is quite vanilla, so she's not yet completely with it yet and doesn't want to talk about it much. I told her we could forget about it if it bothered her we could forget about it. I was also honest about porn not being the full reason I wanted her to keep the key. I said I wanted her to have a little bit of control. Not much more was said, but she did keep the keys. I made sure I did more dishes the next couple days and worked on our bathroom remodel. There isn't any tease and denial going on, mostly because we have 2 kids. I'm not really worried about that. Her walking through the house in panties or leggins is enough to give me a rise everyday. So today, I laid in bed with her while the kids were playing in the living room. I said "being locked up was tough last night." She giggled and said "I don't want to hear it." I asked her if she was going to add time if I kept talking about it. She said " If you keep talking about it I will LOSE the keys!" I immediately said "Yes mam!" This had me throbbing in my cage! She gets her regular orgasms with the vibrator I bought her, both solo and while we have sex. I've always been eager to go down on her because she tastes so good and I enjoy it. She enjoys climaxing from that as well. We don't have a bad sex life, we just aren't able to make the time to very easily with kiddos in the house. I was hoping to bring out a dominant side of her, which is still under question. I am however, while I'm typing this, still securely locked and haven't brought it up again. Can anyone give me any insight on dealing with chastity with a submissive wife???
Well for starters you could mention “you know what really turns me on about all this is ___.” She can’t read your mind, tell her what you like. It certainly doesn’t mean she will do those things or act any differently, but if she is submissive she may do some of it to please you. Bottom line, if she doesn’t know what turns you on, it’s not a realistic expectation that she will come up with it on her own. I may not be a perfect comparison, since I mentioned this stuff within a few months of dating. I told her that I am sexually submissive and don’t like making those decisions, I liked being controlled. With that knowledge she took the reigns. The rest developed over time. It took her a while to adjust as well. She turned into someone that likes the control and wouldn’t go back to the other way now. So I would say communicate. If she doesn’t know what your desires are, she will eventually just feel like a babysitter, guarding keys so you don’t touch yourself without her.
Rule #1 about chastity. Don't talk about chastity with your wife lol. No its good if you have a nice talk about expectations if she is up for it but women don't wanna be bothered with discussing it all the time. Stay locked and treat her like a queen and she will pay you back. Give her time to process all of it. Don't give her things to read. Let her discover this on her own or answer her questions if she asks. In the beginning not much will happen, deal with it. Eventually she should come around and be more involved. Be sweet to her, kiss her hug her, give her compliments, hold her, snuggle her without any expectations for sex, and do things to make her day easier.
Thanks for the advice.. I won't bring it up again unless she does. I will pamper her as much as possible in the meanwhile. Today is day 4 in lockup. I will keep you posted on what happens next. Thanks!
Hello everyone.. I was so anxious for advice when I initially posted this thread that I didn't give a proper greet. Where are my manners?! My wife and I have been married for 14 years and have two beautiful children. She's a stay at home mom and I'm the provider. Today is day 5 of lockdown and I am so excited about our new adventure in chastity. She has me locked in a cb6000s and has been pretty strict so far. I came home from work yesterday and asked for the keys so I could give it a thorough cleaning. She said "Hmm, now what did I do with them..." with a mischevious grin. Looks like she is slowly warming up to our new arrangement, which keeps me super excited. I did all the dishes yesterday and finished painting the cabinets in our bathroom. I also watched the kids for a couple hours so she could rest in bed. Hopefully she will give me a release soon. If there are any other keyholders here who wish to chime in on this I would love to here from you. I will keep everyone updated on how things go. Have a great day!
So seeing my wife naked while locked is a whole different ball game now.. whoa. She left the bedroom door open while changing and I walked in.. She got a good laugh and I felt like I was bursting out of my cage. She said "Your only allowed out for cleaning unless I say otherwise." I've only read about stuff like this and now its become reality I've also noticed she's been alot more assertive over the last couple days. Hard to believe and tomorrow will be day 6 of lockup. I also noticed her vibrator moved from the closet to her night stand. So freakin hot I hope I don't sound like to too much of a noob here but I've had this fantasy about my wife for a long time and now she's making it happen alcatraz style.
not at all. many of us enjoying reading about others lifestyles and accomplishments. Sounds like its going great. Keep us informed
It always amazes me how quickly the wives of new posters/members go from loving wives to strict keyholders who threaten to throw away the keys and endanger their husband's well being. Stupid me thought that only happens in porn and with guys living their sex lives online. Makes me jealous as it took my wife over a year to become a good keyholder. Even then she still loves me, puts our marriage first and does not want a slave for a husband. Crazy us.
I can only hope that this happens with me and my wife. The chastity cage will arrive tomorrow, but will not be put on until Monday at best.
We have two kids as well and I know what that does to intimate time. I'd offer two suggestions. First off communicate, but not that often. I asked my wife about once a month to make a list of 3 things she likes about chastity and 3 things she doesn't like or would like to change or try. I do the same and we discuss it together. I find setting aside 20 minutes a month is about right for us. It's hard because as the man we are thinking about it all the time. The wife is not. The other thing I would say is try some games. Plenty of ideas online. For us that was a way to make it fun. It also allowed her to do something to me "because it was the game making her".
When I read your post @HubbyLocked to be perfectly honest I had to chuckle. Your getting concerned about being locked up and it's only been a week. You haven't even lost your chastity Virginity yet. Ha This is no doubt something that you've been thinking about for awhile but to just expect your wife to respond how you want her to after only a week. Isn't going to happen. She has the key and she's I control and it sounds like she's already taking some control over you. "I don't want to hear it " ,"now what did I do with them " , the vibrator is moved. She's taking control and in my Opinion lucky for you. She's doing this after only a week my wife took months of me treating her like a Queen to get to the point your at right now. Their are things about chastity and having someone else hold the key that are more difficult to learn than we first thought they would be. Have you ever heard "Be careful what you wish for?" As soon as you give the key and control over to your wife it's out of your hands, literally, communication before, and during is Very Very important also if this is what you told her you want than you need to show her how it's beneficial to her. Or you may be locked for a very long time ( months ) with no sexual stimulation at all. You have just Started on the road to Chastity and FLR relationship where it goes from here Good or Bad is between you and your wife/key holder. Good Luck and Enjoy
It'll happen if you both want it to. Listen to the advice from others on this sight. A lot of us have been living this lifestyle for years, like parents or Grandparents. Believe it or not they do know something about life
I too chuckle when I read someone bemoaning being locked for a few days. For me the locking is inconsequential. It is like wearing a wedding ring. You can still masturbate when locked; or least those who actually are locked know this, so it is just an inconvenience at most. It is the orgasm denial that is the tough part. I do not even think much about being locked anymore. I think about the orgasm denial though. A few months I read a guy post on fetlife how horrible it was to be locked in between his regular sex with his wife every two days. Two whole days without masturbating. The horror, the horror.
It is wonderful sometimes when fantasy becomes reality. My KH had read about chastity and checked out a few cages and decided to order them. She asked me what I thought about it (something I had thought I would enjoy and I do but had not thought to approach her about it). I said it sounded hot, having no idea what she had in mind. she tied me down, blindfolded me and fitted the ring and the cage. As she slip the lock through she said "last chance to say no then I am forever in charge". Hearing nothing she clicked the lock home and hid the keys. This was over 2 years ago. She has changed cages a few times and most recently I am in a small jailbird cage. But she holds the keys and controls me completely and honestly it has made for a much more enjoyable sex life for both of us.