Approptiate punishment

Discussion in 'Female led relationships' started by Andrew K, Nov 2, 2017.

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  1. Andrew K
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    Andrew K Active member

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    I need some input,

    My current lock up started on September 2, after we amended our current contract, thus transferring more power to my wife.

    Locktober has been a fun and sensual journey with me sending her pictures of me in my (or her) femme lingerie while at the office. There have been some t&d and quite a few orgasms for her. This time it has been stricter than any previous lock up, and I have been horny pretty much 24/7.

    So far, all amazing.

    On the last day of October I was allowed to enter her, but not allowed to orgasm. She teased me a bit before I got to enter her. The sex we had was amazing. I was on the very edge for about 20 minutes or so. Withdrawing at just the right time to calm down a bit then at it again, we clould have continued for ever. I was rock hard and she enjoyed my arousal and frustration as much as I enjoyed her pleasure.

    Then It happened. I was very close, and withdrew. I felt it would be ok. But it wasn’t. Trying my best to calm down while out of her for several seconds I felt how my body betrayed me. I felt how the ejaculation came even though there was no stimulation. A month of build up forced itself out of me.

    I felt like a failure, and that I had broken the firmest of the rules in our contract.

    She asked me rethorically what punishment I think I deserve.

    She doesn’t see added days of lock up, flogging or putting me in cuffs and chains as punishment. That in her eyes, is play and rewards. None of us are into humiliation, so that is out of the question.

    The worst punishment would be to stop playing our chastity game. I hope she don’t want that, I know I don’t.

    She wants it to be severe enough to teach me a lesson. I feel, that in order to keep our amazing game going I need to show her I am taking our chastity contact dead serious.

    In our arsenal of toys the thing I fear the most is our cane, closely followed by our japanes nipple clamps.

    Is this he punishment I should suggest?

    She has also told me that her trust in my judgement (or will) to keep on the right side of orgasming is consumed, and that that she will need to find a way to manage that.

    PS. I have sent this message to my wife so that she knows my thoughts to comply with one of the upgrades of our contract. So she knows and can have her say. DS
     
  2. Mash2214
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    Mash2214 Locked today, tomorrow, forever

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    To be locked up for a long period of time. Like a month and than stimulated and teased doesn't make it easy for you to hold back. If you were on the edge for 20 minutes and than allowed to enter her, let's be realistic. You did very well to hold off as long as you did. What ever your arrangement is you are still a man that loves his wife and gets excited by being involved with her. Yes you may have had an Orgasm and feel like you've fail but that's no reason to discontinue something that's given you so much pleasure. In our relationship when something like this happens I get a disciplinary Spanking ( 50 hard strokes with the strap and maybe some cane strokes ). You didn't totally fail you just had a minor set back. She should also be proud of what you have accomplished. Deal with the inappropriate orgasm, than its done and continue on. It would be very sad to discontinue something that gives you both a lot of pleasure because of a natural act. Deal with it and continue
     
  3. richard
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    richard Just me

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    The guillotine!
    or
    Hang you by the balls until you squeal for forgiveness.

    or just let her come up withe something herself and you take it whatever she wants to throw at you.
     
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  4. JiL
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    JiL servitude4u

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    Unfortunately, I think it's something that she ultimately has to come up with, as she must approve of, administer, and oversee your punishment. Hope she makes it what it needs to be for you. :mad: Good luck, and let us know what happens.
     
  5. Obydntslave
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    Obydntslave New member

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    You asked for suggestions not advise so here is what my wife would do. and yes I may get the paddle also.
    when I do something like this my wife makes me lick up all the cum, patting my head and saying things like good little bitch lick it all up she then asks me if I liked eat all my cum if I say no she slaps my face and asks again until I say yes, she then tells me to go put my butt plug in until she gives me permission to take it our (usually makes me put it in every morning for a week), Her thinking is when I eat my cum it brings me back to submission very quickly and having the plug in is a good daily reminder that I'm her bitch and need to try harder to obey. unfortunately its to late for you or is it, I think she should pull you out of your cage make you jerk off in front of her (lock you up immediately for another month) and do the above.
     
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  6. jshackleton2016
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    Several spoon thwacks to the balls. My wife just began doing this to me, with her grandmothers old wooden spoon. It hurts without any erotic pleasure at all. I do not like it. My guess is either will you, thus making it a punishment and not a 'funishment.'
     
  7. chasteta
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    chasteta Active member

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    Don't be too hard on yourself. It sounds like it was a genuine accident so I don't think you really broke anyone's trust. Especially that it took a few seconds after stimulation had stopped for ejaculation to start and that you (from what I read) did not stimulate yourself during it. After a month locked I don't think I could last more than a few seconds inside my girlfriend without numbing cream and a condom. And even then it'd be a battle.

    That being said, I would be punished in this situation as well. Not for a violation of trust, however, but just for being a bit careless. Probably a good round of swats with the crop, with apologies for what I'd done in between each impact.
     
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  8. Loudogger
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    Loudogger Active member

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    How about a dozen drops of Tabasco sauce down the front of your cage while tied to the bed ?
     
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  9. Mash2214
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    Mash2214 Locked today, tomorrow, forever

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    That doesn't sound like fun. You have had this happen to you right ?
     
  10. Loudogger
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    Loudogger Active member

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    Personally no......but I’ve known of a few caged betas that have had this type of correction imposed. Yes not fun quite intense particularly if done with a fully enclosed cage like CBxxxx etc
     
  11. RexVa
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    RexVa Long term member

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    Your wise wife will surely administer the kind of disposition you deserve for this, @Andrew K.

    To make amends going forward, you should acknowledge and verbally express to her your remorse and regret for such utter lack of respect and self-control; make a serious effort at increasing your obedience, including undertaking selfless acts of service, and demonstrate true and sustained submission to her.

    Take this seriously, and it might help you in keeping your "amazing game" going. Good luck.
     
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  12. Andrew K
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    Andrew K Active member

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    She is firm and very true to our contract, just as she should be. She believes that it was the ruined orgasm I was after, as it has happened in previous lock ups as well. That’s why she feels she needs to put don her foot.
     
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  13. Andrew K
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    Andrew K Active member

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    Sounds fair.
     
  14. PouchPantyLover
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    PouchPantyLover Long term member

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    I agree with comments that you should not be overly hard on yourself. This will happen. Take it seriously, take whatever punishment your wife decides on and move on. I love the funishment vs. punishment comment. A true punishment spanking will never be mistaken for a reward. I would encourage your wife/KH to do a little study online regarding this. If you aren't begging for it to stop, she hasn't gone far enough.
     
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  15. chasteta
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    chasteta Active member

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    Well... if you have a history of "accidents" then I don't blame her for the suspicion.

    Personally I hate crops and my KH knows that. If I were her, I'd choose your least favorite implement. I'd wait for a weekend and tell you I was going to punish you severely with it that night. I'd have you wear nothing but your cage around the house that evening. I'd make you clean the house and cook me a nice dinner. You could eat your portion sitting on the floor next to the table. I'd carry the implement around with me all night. The entire time I'd want you to be serving and dreading the beating that you know is coming; unable to ever get it out of your mind. When it was administered I'd make you apologize repeatedly and wouldn't stop until you were in tears and begging, and even then I'd probably go on for a bit. After, I'd lovingly but firmly explain my expectations, and we could move on.

    I agree with Pouch, funishment vs punishment is an important distinction.
     
  16. Shepherdsflock
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    Shepherdsflock Long term member

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    If it’s punishment you need, maybe go for thumb screws or water boarding. Those methods seem to be pretty effective.
     
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  17. sissyassslut
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    sissyassslut Active member

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    My KH's favorite punishment is to use the TENs on me. Hooded and gagged and tied to the bed (I hate not being able to see what is going on) she teases me until I am straining against the cage then she slides a sleeve she bought over the cage and puts a pad on my balls and starts bumping up the power. Sometimes she will add some hot wax dripping on my balls and in the opening In the cage to the mix as I moan and plead into the ball gag.
     
  18. Serafina's pet
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    Serafina's pet Locked and loved by lady Serafina

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    Write during any free time. Mistresses needs come first when i put my needs before my mistriss i am dishonering my mistress and my posiion as her slave. By cumming without permission i have taken from mistress what can never be given back. My lady had me do something similar had to write time and day and log everytime i wrote in note book.
     
  19. DonnaSue
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    DonnaSue Long term member

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    Sounds to me that you are looking for "funishment" to suit your desires. If, as you said, humiliation is out of the question, then, perhaps being properly humiliated would serve to alter your behavior.
     
  20. filltee
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    filltee Junior Member

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    My KH suggests if you really want a self-induced punishment you carve your own butt plug then have it in for an hour whilst restrained to prvent it from coming out and/or you helping it out.
    BTW the material to carve it from is root ginger.

    Next time will require a new one and be in for two hours.
     
  21. jemima
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    jemima maid for my Mistress

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    @Andrew K eeeek. i wudnt have ask folks on here if i was you. Theres some horrible things sayed.
     
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  22. filltee
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    filltee Junior Member

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    I think it is likely that any request for punishment suggestions is real, just as it is equallly likely that it is merely a plea for fantasy fuel.
     
  23. imasissytoo
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    imasissytoo Active member

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    How about you tied to a chair and your wife while wearing earplugs scrapes her nails on a chalk board?
     
  24. MadamBelle
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    MadamBelle Active member

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    I don't have very good wooden spoons!!! I spanked my Toy and it broke after the third one! It was about 9 years old...
     
  25. Andrew K
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    Andrew K Active member

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    Thank you for all the input!

    My wife has told me that all of the suggested by me is to be considered as “funishment”, including the cane and nipple clamps. All of these are however in her opinion things I need to practice in order to get used to pain. So, she will put me through all of that, just because she can (our contract stipulates that I can not say no, and have to show a positive attitude towards any sexual activity suggested by her) to add some “fun” to our little arrangement.

    Punishment needs to go much deeper according to her. Me not knowing what or when she says is good for me, to practice letting go of my need for control.

    Me orgasming again without her permission would seriously diminish her motivation to keep me locked. So I must show that I have the right attitude towards our agreement and the powers I have volunteered to her. Tolerance for error is at an all time low.

    We still love each other madly, and as a couple we as strong as ever. She is an amazing wife, and a strict but fair Keyholder.
     
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