Keyholder and locked up: our journey

Discussion in 'Journals and blogs' started by TheKeyIsMine12, Oct 14, 2017.

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  1. TheKeyIsMine12
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    I locked you up 14 days ago, Pietje 12, because I wanted to. I like to control you and I know you do too. At the same time I fully acknowledge that I have not been the most sexy attentive key holder for you. I regret that and want to change things and as you said earlier, I really want us to reset our dynamic.

    For all other viewers and readers: I have set deadlines on my husband Pietje12s period of locking up, because I felt I had to end it somewhere. Today I realised that there is actually no need in defining the end date right now. Why should I? The only way to get rid of his hormonal roller coaster is to get you Pietje 12 used to the cage. And that is only accomplished by staying in there for a real long time.

    Pietje 12 does not give up easily so I am curious how long he can hang in there. I can commit to being a key holder of my locked husband for a very long time, because I realised today (finally Pietje 12) that its your and not my responsibility to let me know if you can't handle it any more. And I won't give in to whining and begging...

    I know I still have a long way to go to make you actually believe me.. and actions speak louder than words. So I think the most powerful word is: I locked you and I like you locked, because then I know you are mine.

    In the mean time: lets have fun, with extra large dick pin put into your cage on Sundays, wearing the CB whilst travelling tot NY in 2 weeks ( still locked up, but not fully stainless steel and therefore detectable on the airport) and also to Mexico just after Christmas. And let us celebrate a beautiful locked up new year in Mexico! love you Pietje 12.

    Ps Thanks to Sarah8 and Mascare^Snake for their friendly and sexy advices...
     
  2. Pietje12
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    Pietje12 A champion was a contender who refused to give up.

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    "Beware what you ask for" is the mantra that goes through my mind. I admit, I had a hunch after a chat with Ms Amanda earlier today.

    First things first: you are the love of my life, I am so blessed that we are soulmates. We struggled and a part of our struggle is documented on the Mansion. Sharing my emotions was not always appreciated given the number of supportive messages you got, but let me emphasize: I'm extremely proud to have you as my wife and the majority of the shared emotions were fueled by the will to make this work and to get a health sexual life again.

    I have no idea where this path that you chose will lead us to, but rest assured that I look forward to this shared journey. Together we can achieve everything.

    We agreed to clear the playing field with a fresh start. You know that you push my buttons when you plan to take me to a nudist pool. You have me on my knees if you put your money where your mouth is. I feel blessed with this new start. Game on!
     
  3. TheKeyIsMine12
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    Love you too Pietje12. The nudist pool is open on Sundays and you know your time will end on the last Sunday for Christmas.. So lets go;)
     
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  4. Joroincharge
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    Joroincharge Lock em up - 24/7/365!!

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    Mega size criss-cross pin is best:):):):)
     
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  5. Pietje12
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    Pietje12 A champion was a contender who refused to give up.

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    We just had the most amazing 24 hours in our relationship. We feel connected, admired and loved again. Physical evidence of that made it impossible to push the mega pin more than half way in. Next time maybe :)
     
  6. Joroincharge
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    Joroincharge Lock em up - 24/7/365!!

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    Easy sorted. Icy cold water so you go soft and shrink. Then she pushes the pin down hard and lock. And if she then puts the key in one of those ksafes (kitchen safes).......................:D:p:p:D
     
  7. Pietje12
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    Pietje12 A champion was a contender who refused to give up.

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    I have a couple of "get out of jail, free" cards. I lost two cards today :)
     
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  8. TheKeyIsMine12
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    I fully agree with Pietje12. It was really amazing last night and today. Loved every minute of it. Next time I will get ice to get him to wear the big pin. in the meantime I am thinking where to put my reserve key. No need to keep it in the house as he is wearing his device full time and indefinitely. Any sexy ideas where to put the reserve key? I was thinking of giving it to my best friend. She knows I keep him locked up and lives 30 kilometres from here. So sounds like a very safe place.
     
  9. TheKeyIsMine12
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    So now you are out of options... the only thing you can do is go with my flow...so you shall swim in a cage together with my wearing the key somewhere beginning of November. And we can do it more than once because you are out of cards...
     
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  10. Joroincharge
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    Joroincharge Lock em up - 24/7/365!!

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    Good idea. And for a real mind game you can put it in a lockbox first and you keep the lockbox key.
     
  11. Pietje12
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    Pietje12 A champion was a contender who refused to give up.

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    For the first time in years I feel that we're on the same page again. That bond is essential for me I'm realising now. Let's go swimming and invite your BFF for the key :)
     
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  12. thefemdecided
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    thefemdecided Long term member

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    My spare key is with a friend who knows it's purpose. She uses it occasionally, but always phones first.
    Jane
     
  13. Joroincharge
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    Joroincharge Lock em up - 24/7/365!!

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    So how does your 'card system' work?
     
  14. Pietje12
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    Pietje12 A champion was a contender who refused to give up.

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    The truth is: I made it up. Until yesterday she threatened with actions, but carried them out. I couldn't sleep last night and she was awake when I woke up. There were two towels next to me and she was ready for the nudist hour in the local swimming pool. I chickened out and came up with this monopoly card system. I wasn't ready and this was my excuse.
     
  15. Pietje12
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    Pietje12 A champion was a contender who refused to give up.

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    ˆˆ Poor poor English in my previous post. I didn't make it up, I came with the idea as an excuse for chickening out. Secondly she never carried out her threats so I wasn't worried at all.
    ----
    We're having fun again, it's just amazing what a poor or bad sexual life can make a difference. We have a pretty lighthearted approach with little rules no femdom but a few strict elements: the cage won't be removed and if we focus on her sexual needs we have a clear moment when we switch and switch back.

    She shared this with her best friend and don't ask me why, but everyone tends to like it or is at least a little amused. We'll be going to a bit naughty party in some weeks together with my best female friend who's gay and even she loved the element of control. Within minutes she was bonding with my wife and making plans.

    I feel sorry for members who are searching for a keyholder for a long time and I have two within some days and a third who is fascinated. Let me be clear: I'm only dropping my pants for my wife. Perhaps the reason is because we share it in a dignified way and only as a response when the discussion is directed towards sexuality. I know I shouldn't feel the need to defend myself.

    We struggled for so long, let's just enjoy this moment!
     
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  16. TheKeyIsMine12
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    very well put Pietje12!

    just quick sound bite of todays journey: we enjoyed a perfect dinner out at our favourite restaurant. I laid my high red heels on his cage and started teasing. He enjoyed, and at the same time I can feel how his cock is shrinking... any one familiar/ any ideas on how to shrink at more? Apart from just putting him in a smaller case of course...
     
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  17. Mascara^Snake
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    Mascara^Snake Banned

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    If you keep it locked all the time it will shrink. Not very much but it woll be noticeable after 8 or nine months.
    Yes then a smaller cage is agood idea.
    he can actually wear one which is shorter than his flaccid size.
     
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  18. Pietje12
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    Pietje12 A champion was a contender who refused to give up.

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    You can't deny that we finally found something that works for us (with the help of others for which I'm grateful). We have fun, go out again and I love your naughty acts.

    Having our chat in mind, I have an idea about your advice to my wife. The good part is: you've found the exception to the rule, I'm not giving in and have no intention to do so :) Secondly, being above average I'm not impressed by a little shrinkage in a little time frame.
     
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  19. Pietje12
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    Pietje12 A champion was a contender who refused to give up.

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    I never imagined I would say this, but men (or alt least one man) can be too busy too. I think I got the message.
     
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  20. TheKeyIsMine12
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    After a couple of very busy days, we had the most amazing day today. His penis is definitely not shrinking yet as he was complaining about how much the pin hurts... So one thing is for sure: the cage will have to stay there for a very long time to make his dick shrink.

    He can sometimes be a bit surprised that I am really not giving in. He played ' the get out of jail card for free"for nude swimming once and he knows I will not give in next time.

    Today he licked my ass in the best way ever... he was (and is) very dedicated after being locked up for 21 days now. I enjoy every minute of our dynamics and he definitely knows how to bring me to the next level of orgasms.
     
  21. TheKeyIsMine12
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    hero of my day (and life) is definitely Pietje 12
     
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  22. Pietje12
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    Pietje12 A champion was a contender who refused to give up.

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    I'm wondering if there are still people left who have an idea what's happening over here as we seem to hop from crisis to love and reluctance to strict. Boredom was the main problem followed by defensive behavior when we started to experiment. We learned the hard way that we shouldn't discuss sex when our emotions are in the way, that we have to allow the other to share his/her feelings without interrupting, judging or becoming angry and never come up with excuses when something went wrong or we forgot to pay attention.

    An excuse is the easiest way but it also gives the other the feeling that he/she should have known better than to bring it up, puts the blame elsewhere and doesn't create a positive outlook. We learned that responding with: "I hear you, you're right, it won't happen tomorrow" solved 50% of the fights. Another 40% was solved when we realized that stepping back and stopping at all as a single sided decision, created disappointment, fear and anger with the other. This is basically the action part instead of the discussions. Stepping forward and show that you've heard her/his words created respect instead of disappointment and looking down on the other.

    We still have a lot of work to do, but we started to listen to each other, have a lighthearted approach, have fun along the way and feel the love coming back. I just love to lick her ass, it was forbidden territory for 20 years and definitely a blacklisted topic for discussion. I think someone regrets that now :)
     
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  23. guest 2942
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    guest 2942 Long term member

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    yes this thread has been a little hard to follow but its still interesting so don't let that bother you. In the beginning chastity can be confusing and sometimes difficult so no worries.
     
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  24. Pietje12
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    Pietje12 A champion was a contender who refused to give up.

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    The TL;DR; version is: Sex was boring, I proposed to quit, she refused and proposed to experiment. Whatever we tried, we were unable to escape the destructive process of responding to shared emotions with excuses instead of listening and changing behavior. It took a crisis and a lot more to find the key that works for us.

    The current situation is that chastity might work this time. Chastity was her choice. I feel we're moving in the right direction. There is a possibility that I understood what I did wrong and stopped doing that. My view that she is acting though give me the idea that she sees that stepping forward woks better than pulling the plug. I'm just very careful right now and don't take anything for granted. I'm optimistic, but I'm aware that it can be over tomorrow. That's not a problem - I proposed to quit sex at first - the problem is that it affects our marriage. We have kids. Sex is less important than their future.
     
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  25. thefemdecided
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    thefemdecided Long term member

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    I am a bit worried that wading in without knowing all the background may mean that either I am talking rubbish or, far worse, that I make things worse rather than better. If I cause any upset I apologise in advance and please ignore me.

    What I have got from the thread is that you are taking positive actions to try to solve an issue. I can relate to that as I have done the same thing, and I also selected chastity as the approach. I suppose I could have picked one of several alternatives, but the one I chose has worked for us, I do hope it works for you as there is so much going for the concept.

    I keep harping on that there is no single right way to do this. The right way is the way that works for you and pushes your buttons.

    Keep communicating with each other. Get support from others and ignore the trolls. Be yourselves, and know that there are loads of people out there that are wishing you nothing but success in your lives together.

    Love
    Jane
    X
     
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