Over the last month and a half things have grown and changed with my husband and I. Recently I have let him enjoy going down on me from time to time. With that being said it is VERY brief and I pump the brakes and tell him get out! I came across this article today and thought omg this is ME! ( Minus the lesbian part To all that are overseas I am not sure if the weblink will work? http://elitedaily.com/dating/sex/enjoy-oral-sex-when-self-conscious/1664301/ To anyone who can relate in the slightest to the aversion and overthinking of having someone's head between your legs.. how did you overcome it?
My wife used to be that way but I kept telling her how her scent and taste turned me on. At first she would only let me go downtown if she had just showered but things changed over time. Last night she was ripe having spent the day in the garden and out of the blue she asked me to follow her and get on my knees. I thought she wanted me to bring her to orgams but instead she pushed my head away and told me just to smell. After a minute of that, she pulled her pants up and went back to watching TV. It just takes patience and encouragement. My wife has a very senstive vagina/clitorous. I have to go slow and ease into any oral. However, once she allows me to start, she will orgsam in under a minute most times while holding my head hard against her by my hair. She is still sometimes iffy about her vagina smelling but she knows how much I prefer her natural scent to soap. You just need to understand that your scents were designed by God himself to sexually attract men. The cosmetics industry has done a great job of making women think they smell bad. There is a letter from Napoleon to Josephine telling her not to bathe because he would be home in a week. I happen to be very turned on by a woman's natural scent. I am sometimes attracted to women I do not like, but their scent arouses me.
The answer is so simple that it won't seem like good advice, but IT IS. Of course some guys may not enjoy doing it but that's not really part of the question here. It's more about you being comfortable with it. A lot of men (myself included) really enjoy going down on a woman. I've done it with multiple women and under multiple different circumstances. Anywhere from super clean just after a shower...to later in the day after we have ate, drank, danced, etc. It's not even that I don't mind doing it, I actually like doing it. I can promise you that any issue with it only exists in your mind. You're creating a problem that isn't really there. So don't psych yourself out over it. All I can tell you is to just relax and enjoy it. It may help knowing that he is likely loving every second of it and loves the way you look, taste, smell, etc. He should finish down there and look you right in the eyes and thank you for letting him do it (I would and I'm not even a locked up submissive boy).
My wife never has overcome it. After almost 9 years together she has ever once let me down there. I wish she would.
@TimidKeyHolder , my wife was the same way. But after we started chastity my desire to go down on here grew, obviously. She eventually lost her inhibitions when I told her I enjoyed it and desired it. I think that might be key for some women. Being self conscious about yourself may be only in your head. Having it vocalized to you how much he wants to pleasure you in that way can definitely help. I also think pre-chastity sex affected her inhibitions. She asked me once why I never desired it before to which the only honest answer I could muster was that I was just selfish. I though making love was enough for her. I remember the first time she orgasmed from me going down on her after we started chastity, her legs were shaking and she was convulsing or something. I though is she having a seizure? lol. I paused for a moment and she yelled at me to not stop ha ha. It was exciting to experience and realized she never really did that with traditional sex. Lesson learned
My Wife seemed to be a little self-conscious awhile back and always seemed to need a shower just prior to going to bed. While I can appreciate clean and personally not into being too sweaty after a long day out in the heat or the gym I do LOVE the taste and scent of my Wife. Some time ago my Wife asked if I truly enjoy going down on Her - my response: "Beyond words" - It is such an intense craving I have for @n2toys that has only gotten deeper and deeper the more I'm locked and denied. To empathize - I have a very strong kinky/submissive desire and intensely love being bound in strict inescapable bondage but if I 'had' to choose between either bondage or worshiping my Wife it's no question that worshiping Her would be my choice. Side note: A few weeks ago my Goddess had an unexpected extended monthly issue and I was unable to worship for about a week - I was in a bad mood and sulking for a bit as the craving was so intense. Obviously She had no control over that and also not happy about it; my sulking was the last thing I should have visibly expressed, even though I never intended to show my let down I obviously did. One night during cuddling my Goddess really clamped down very intensely on one of my nipples to cause punishment pain as opposed to a sexual torment for my sulking attitude - I absolutely deserved that correction.
I don't have many hard limits when it comes to my Wife's control of my access to orgasms. Whether they are her regular ones or my increasingly rare ones she is in charge. I can however say two things about this subject. The first is that if she suddenly told me that I was no longer allowed to satisfy her orally then my agreement to my chastity would end. It is my hard limit to end all hard limits. Unless there was something medical involved I would want to know why, where this decision came from. This leads directly into my second statement. We have been married nearly 30 years. If she had been like you or like the author of the article before she let go of her inhibitions, that relationship would never have happened. It would have faltered before it got started. I am afraid I do not understand either men who won't lick pussy or women who won't let it happen. I could be friends with a woman like that but I couldn't be in an intimate relationship with them. Isn't it a bit arrogant for a woman to decide for their partner that they couldn't possibly be enjoying themselves? If I tell you I want to lick you but you decide I am obviously not happy doing so you are basically calling me a liar. This might sound harsh but it is how I feel. Licking my Wife's yoni is the most privileged thing I am allowed to do. When she has an orgasm because of what I am doing it is still a powerful experience. To be denied my orgasms is one thing. To be denied hers from oral sex is a step too far.
@TimidKeyHolder Maybe you should try a different approach to oral sex. Granted I have no idea about how you're going about it now but maybe trying it from a different angle would be a good idea. I bought a book titled "She comes first" it's about teaching men the basics of what women like about oral sex. I was already pretty damn good at it but there were a lot of good pointers that I was able to take advantage of and made me that much better. If you haven't been allowing your husband to go down on you he's probably not very good at it which is also a problem. You can see how this would be a vicious cycle. After he reads the book, the next time you two are being intimate make sure you are nice and turned on and then let him try on you again. If you become uncomfortable make him stop and pleasure you another way and once you're relaxed again allow him to go back down on you. My wife has me switch back and forth between penetration and going down on her among other things to keep things switched up and interesting and she loves that and so do I. All of that being said even though my wife loves oral it is definitely not something that we can just start with, anytime I've tried to go down on her first thing I get a huge rejection. By the time I go down there we've usually been kissing heavily and a lot of forplay so it's definitely some she wants before I go there otherwise it's a no go. Don't deprive yourself of this pleasure for yourself, it's a most enjoyable experience for both partners when done correctly, I've never given my wife better orgasms than I have with oral. I also feel so submissive when locked and pleasing my mistress this way.
Update on us. We've been having all sorts of fun and flirty love. Last night I sent him a photo of me in my in tall fuck me leather boots. This morning I came home to beautiful flowers. This afternoon we rolled around In the covers. He went to get on top of me and we both proceeded to fall off the bed. hahha. I suppose my sex life is as quirky and silly as I am in my real life. I proceeded to unlock him and let him play for a while... I dismounted him and pulled out right in time to ruin him