What made you become a sub or a mistress

Discussion in 'Female led relationships' started by IM HER B1TCH, Apr 13, 2016.

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  1. IM HER B1TCH
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    IM HER B1TCH Member

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    Wondering how people got this into there lives. How did u start this chastity lifestyle.

    Did something happen in your life. Was you always into this or was you introduced to it.

    Looking forward to how peps got into
     
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  2. Mistress Jules
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    Mistress Jules Professional Dominatrix and Owner of Lockit
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    I got into it when someone on a dating site asked if I was into Male Chastity. I had never heard of it. 2 days of "working from home" later, I was hooked lol.
     
  3. Lockedwithlove
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    Lockedwithlove I am my Queen's toy

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    I was watching to much porn and self pleasuring far to often for to many years. In a nutshell I came across chastity online and saw the potential benefits to my wife and I and I wanted to change. 1 year later my wife is now my Mistress and KH and we are both loving our new lifestyle. No going back now! ;) if you're interested here's my blog http://www.chastitymansion.com/foru...ience-of-chastity-and-love.17572/#post-158302
     
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  4. fluffles
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    fluffles New member

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    My gf of 8 years and myself gradually got more and more into bdsm since we met. We are both naturaly sub but learned how to be switch to make one another happy.

    Last year my gf added a cheap vinyl cock cage to our routine online purchase of bdsm toys. I'd never seriously thought about chastity before then, but I had been turned on by (and practiced!) orgasm denial going back to my high school girlfriends 15 years ago.

    Anyway i was surprised she wanted the cage but turns on. When it arrived it barely fit and was sharp on my skin. I was so disappointed that I couldn't wear it. My gf saw that I was upset about this cheap piece of crap not fitting , and encouraged me to get a better one. I bought a knock off cb6000s and we both has a load of fun with it.

    A few months later we started to see that chastity had a huge positive effect on my mood swings and on our intimacy, so we obsessively measured my junk, then ordered a mature metal queens keep device.

    Now I sleep in the device most every night, and we're slowly figuring out how an flr works best for us. I hope this description helps someone else get close to their partner.
     
  5. Sunny
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    Sunny Long term member

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    Before chastity, neither I was sub nor my wife was dominant
    God knows how but she always suspected that I was having affair/s
    So I introduced chastity to her just to prove that extramarital affair is not possible while locked in a cage
    She jumped on this idea and I was locked 24x7 in April 2012, except release during intercourse
    Later we discovered that sexual life became much more exciting than ever before
    And gradually I became submissive while she became dominant, which she enjoyed most
     
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  6. jemima
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    jemima maid for my Mistress

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    i think i always been one really cos at school i was bullied a lot and my 2 sisters told me what to do all the time and i cant ever rember not being told what to do. i'm not very good at doing things on my own anyways so its prob best that folks do tell me what to do.
     
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  7. Jasmic68
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    Jasmic68 Long term member

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    I am so glad you have found someone who cares for you Jemima. I hate bullies pretty much more than anything else in this world, there is absolutely no excuse to make someone else feel bad for any reason.

    Anyway, I got into this as a way of saying sorry to my Wife for upsetting her with my genital modification. I had no idea how difficult chastity would be but I rapidly became convinced I wanted this to continue. I still feel that way though after six months my Wife and I are just beginning to really work out what we want this chastity lifestyle to be like. I have come to realize that my Wife was doing this primarily to make me happy, and I am glad she does, but I really want her to find a balance that suits her more than it suits me.
     
  8. Brianna27
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    Brianna27 Junior Member

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    I would say I have always been a sub and love strong women. I worship the ground they walk on. I will do anything a women asks me to do.
     
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  9. DonnaSue
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    DonnaSue Long term member

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    I was just surfing the Internet one evening, in my panties, when my wife of 25 years walked in and saw me in panties for the first time! From that point to the present (> 5 years), she has appealed to my feminine side by having me dress more and more in women's clothing, especially lingerie. Then came the wig, makeup lessons, mannerisms, etc and, at the same time, she took over control of me, little by little. You could easily say that She has feminized me and had me pledge my chastity to her.

    Only recently, when She became aware of my wanking problem, did She incorporate the cage into our relationship. While it makes it somewhat easier to be chaste, it's not been a problem for me! Whatever it takes to serve Mistress! I love our FLR!
     
  10. Sam wood
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    Sam wood Active member

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    We've switched and changed roles over the years but I think we're both more comfortable with things the way they are now. Age has bought some maturity, although we're both still a little irespossible at times. I think what's made the difference is just learning to let her show the way and keeping my mouth shut as much as I can. It's so wonderful and I feel so proud that she is the one that pushed things like my slave number tattoo, wearing my collar, things I wear etc. That makes it really special. I love the dynamic we have between us and the fact that unlike some couples who go through life, all boring and filling the normal husband/wife roles, we have another sort of special thing going on. A place to play, to hide, a place to think and a place to let go of all those expected normalities that you have to deal with in life.
     
  11. gary170
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    gary170 Long term member

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    We also have switched over the years my wife was my slave for a bit but the chastity always seemed to be the most popular until my wife said she far preferred me locked away the rest is history as they say lol
    Our marriage has never been better , we always had a great marriage but it is even better we have never been so happy I am slowly becoming more submisive and my wife is certainly growing into her role as my mistress :)
    Couldn't be more in love and I cherish her so much :)
     
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  12. chastitylockdown
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    chastitylockdown Junior Member

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    I've always had a bondage kink and discovered chastity play about 15 years ago. I bought, and later ended up selling several devices after many failed searches for a key holder who lived close to my small town. I even tried talking a couple ex-girlfriends into being my KH, but they weren't interested, said it was "weird".

    Flash forward to the summer of 2015 and my current g/f. Shortly after we moved in together, I told her about chastity as a way to deal with my masturbation habit that she despised. She jumped on the idea and now she loves her power over me and how I am attentive to her needs. When she asks me to do something and if I don't, then she will threaten to add days, so I suppose we're in a mild FLR. Will we ever get to a total FLR, probably not since she is naturally submissive and doesn't like making too many decisions. Either way, I am just happy to finally be locked up 24/7 by a woman who is also my soulmate.
     
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  13. PuellaPurpurea
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    My boyfriend and I discovered fairly early in our relationship (high school years), by means of "trapping" each other with our jackets and teasing each other about being stuck, that we were into BDSM-ish stuff. Over the years we've done lots of back and forth, playing with everything poor college/grad students could... water bottle rings as Kali's Teeth, cheap vinyl female chastity belts, an under-the-bed bondage rig, a custom collar and two interchangeable name tags for it, a knockoff CB, etc. I don't remember exactly when or how chastity came into the mix; I suppose one of us learned about it at one point and we thought it was a natural extension of what we were already doing. We're still figuring out what our ideal chastity setup is, though.

    Despite both of us being switches, we've found that me being on top is our default state. Both of us find it very comfy when I straddle him, like it just feels right for me to be above him. <3
     
  14. MeanBitch
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    MeanBitch Long term member

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    Taking control of my husband was just a natural evolution for us given our personalities (me: strong, dominant, selfish, him: weak, lazy, soft) but putting him in chastity was a practical thing and not a kink. It is the best way to establish control and enforce obedience, period. Still, even though it's not a kinky thing for me I admit that I get a lot of pleasure and satisfaction when I see him walking around locked tight in his belt or having to sit down to pee like a bitch. It makes me feel proud and powerful that I have put a man in his place and taken away his sexuality and even his manhood.
     
  15. Jasmic68
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    Jasmic68 Long term member

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    Sit down to pee like a bitch? Are you serious? You are on a different trajectory into male chastity than anything I have read from anyone during all the months that I have been part of this community or any other. One of the things I have picked up from all of my reading is that for this to work there has to be mutual respect for each other in the relationship and you don't have any for your own (alleged) gender. You certainly don't have mine.

    I realize you haven't solicited my opinion but here it is anyway. I read your other introductory posts and I won't be reading any more from you. That is abuse.
     
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  16. Mistress B
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    Mistress B Mistress B

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    My introduction to the whole world of domination began when a girlfriend at Uni introduced me to her pro-domme mother. We are still all great friends and meet regularly.
     
  17. Joroincharge
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    Joroincharge Lock em up - 24/7/365!!

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    And in such a way that there's nothing he can do about it, as far as I can see.
     
  18. MeanBitch
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    MeanBitch Long term member

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    lol, not everyone likes me, I'm used to that.

    I'm being honest about my feelings and maybe you would have had to live my entire life to understand them. But even though my husband does not like the chastity aspect he is thriving in the relationship. Some men are naturally betas and need someone strong to provide for them, focus them and manage them. I'm not blackmailing or forcing my husband, he could leave at any time and support himself and find a new relationship, but he needs the structure and discipline that I provide even though at times it's hard for him. If he had more self-discipline he wouldn't need to be locked up, so even he would admit that he brought it on himself. The bottom line is that he may not want to admit it but my husband is the type of man who is not suited for the traditional male role and needs to be with a natural leader like myself. If he didn't feel that way he wouldn't put up with me and what I demand.
     
  19. ChasteHubby2015
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    ChasteHubby2015 Male Feminist

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    I have to say, I agree with you 100%. You've established clear rules for him to abide by should he decide to stay with you and you have every right to do that. He doesn't like the chastity, but it makes him a more well behaved house husband to you and he is willing to sacrifice frequent self pleasure for the comfortable lifestyle and companionship you provide. I don't see anything wrong with that; if anything, I think you're doing a great job in managing him. Best of luck to you.
     
  20. Kiye
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    Kiye subslut of Vylette

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    When my Mistress and I first started chatting on fetlife, I noticed it was something she had on her profile as an interest. At the time it was something I was thinking about a lot, but had never done with a partner before. The key stumbling block was finding someone I could trust to do it with.

    I knew from our earliest correspondences that she was someone I could trust. Through talking about it with one another, it became apparent that we both wanted me to be locked up, so we decided that's something we'd aim for. It's not something we've done massively due to various difficulties, but it's something we're hoping to do more of. I think it's a wonderful form of power exchange- and that's our thing.
     
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  21. MistressLydia
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    MistressLydia New member

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    As a Domme I wasn't immediately drawn to chastity training. I started over 10 years ago strictly as a Disciplinarian/life coach. Over the years clients asked for chastity training and I finally gave into it. Turns out it fit well with Me.... I have been a key holder for about 4 years now.
     
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  22. Vylette
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    Vylette Mistress of Kiye :)

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    I've been into BDSM and kink for a long time; I've got a huge interest in bondage and control, and chastity encompasses both of those. I love the power exchange involved in it, how it can impact mood and attentiveness and how it's an every day reminder that he is mine. My sub and I met on Fetlife/through the local kink scene already with an idea of what we were looking for, we began as D/s play partners and that has developed into more :) Until now, we've mainly lightly dabbled in chastity due to life stuff getting in the way but we're getting to a place where we're looking at it becoming a permanent feature in our relationship. I like the thought that it doesn't matter how vanilla a task he's doing, or where he is, he'll always be locked up and belong to me.
     
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  23. jshackleton2016
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    I was having incredible orgasms riding my dildo by myself. My wife knew what I was doing but didn't really engage. It got lonely. So I locked myself up, walked right up to her and gave her the key and asked if she would be my key holder and presented her with a book on the subject. She immediately took the key, put it in her pocket I have not seen the keys since. That was this past January and I've been locked more than unlocked. It has been a fun adventure that has given us a deeper connection and more intimacy. Loosing the ability to orgasm for prolonged periods is a small price to pay for more loving, touching and thwacking from my wife and goddess. Plus I love being controlled. And she likes bossing me around and being listened too.
     
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  24. maid jessica 43
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    maid jessica 43 Long term member

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    I believe I was born a sissy and a sub
     
  25. Guest 9392
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    Guest 9392 Member

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    i'm like maid jessica. i was born this way.
     
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