Hi everyone I have been interested in chastity for around 15 years and finally my wife gets what it is all about and has agreed to give it a go! I first approached her about 12 years ago when we started to experiment with a bit of kinky play. Rather clumsily I went in with both feet (or balls),put on the CB3000 I had just bought and went Ta Da! She was shocked to say the least and all of my work to introduce her to the kinkier side of life seemed wasted. She did her own research online and got scared by some of the more extreme practices and said that it was a step too far and she just wasn't into it. I left it for a while and just used the CD when she was away, then the kids arrived and our sex life was put on the back burner. About 5 years ago I tried to introduce it once more, again with the same result, however soon after our sex life started to get good again, and we got into regular D/S play sessions, sometimes me on top and sometimes her on top. I started using the CD again occasionally but without a keyholder its not that much fun. I bought a PA5000 as I have been pierced for about 15 years, but found it not very effective in preventing orgasm and eventually it split. About a year ago I bought a CB6000S and found it to be the most comfortable device so far, easily managing to stay locked for a whole weekend when my wife was away and more importantly allowing me to sleep. I modified it slightly to allow it to lock to my PA ring using a steel cable thing I found online, and even with this it was possible to comfortably be locked for couple of days. Meanwhile our play sessions have got better & better and recently she has been enjoying tease & denial, sometimes me, sometimes her and sometimes both of us. When the kids went to Grandparents in the summer we had a very sexy time playing and edging each other for almost the whole week. Last weekend we had a weekend away without kids, had a really loving and intimate time with lots of passionate vanilla sex and afterwards felt closer that we had for a long time. So yesterday I decided to have another go at suggesting we try some chastity play. I did some researching and found this article online explaining from a female perspective what it was all about. http://www.tickleberry.co.uk/male-chastity/lock-him-up/ I crafted an email explaining what I was asking and more importantly what I wasn't asking for so as not to scare her and asked her to read the article and consider. I hit send and waited. A couple of hours later she came into my office (i work from home a lot) and said she got my email and now understood what it was all about and was willing to give it a go even though she still felt a little uncomfortable because the actual devices repulsed her. I then put on the CB600S in the bathroom and handed her the keys agreeing to try it for a few days until our next play date scheduled for Friday (the joys of working from home!) So here I am one day in locked and loving it. I managed to sleep well last night a bit of ball burn, but otherwise pretty comfortable, although I am in an almost constant state of arousal. I know she is doing this because she loves me and is still a bit scared of the actual device so the next few days will be the clincher as to whether this will work longer term. I plan to take it slowly at first while she gets used to it and not pressure her into anything she doesn't want to do, but I am very exited at the prospect of what lies ahead. She mentioned this morning that she has some work Friday and cant make the play date, so we agreed to push it back to Saturday when the kids are out at clubs. Not too disappointed for another day to wait. I ordered a Bon4M small last night which will arrive tomorrow as she mentioned she didn't like the look of the plastic CB's. Hopefully that one will be more to her liking. Any advice on how to play it in these early days will be greatly appreciated. Also any tips for Saturday would be welcomed, should I keep the device on and wait for her to remove it? Should I ask for the keys and take it off first? She is used to me making the first move should I still do that or should I be submissive and let her take control?
my advice would be to NOT pressure her about anything or even bring it up. Do as many nice things for her that you can think of. When sat comes just leave the device on, if she says something about it, then politely remind her that it is hers to do with how she wants, leave it locked up or take it out, its up to her. Although you may want to make recommendations, DON'T. You have to have the mindset its her property and she may do with it as she pleases. Thats my 2 cents.
Thanks for the good advice. I have been doing my best not to bring it up and have been busy doing stuff around the house. She seems a bit distant today with not much interaction and no mention of chastity. I hope she is just getting her head around this and not getting cold feet. I'll sit tight and follow your advice on Saturday.
It's best to let her grow into this at her own pace. At times like today with her seeming distant is perfectly normal. Don't try to read too much into anything. Don't expect that just because you have lock something on your junk that she is going to be anywhere near as excited as you are. She is probably hoping that this is just going to be a quick phase that you are going through and she just has to comply for a while to keep you happy until it wears off. Your best just to do things to keep her happy. Just don't over do it and don't try topping from the bottom. Remain patient and let her come to you. It's tough but hopefully she will grow into it. For some women, it can take months. The next thing is to lube, lube and more lube with A&D ointment. I still use it to this day. Our chastity adventure almost ended as soon as it started when I developed a sore on the bottom of my scrotum from the base ring. She was very concerned about it.
She probably isnt going to mention anything about the chastity to you anytime soon, from my experience. And why would she, she doesnt have something attached to her private parts, you do! lol. Me and my wife started in july this year and she rarely ever brings up the topic unless its time for sex. Not how I imagined it would be but its only the beginning. Just give her time and patience.
Thanks for the tip on the lube, I have been using moisturiser so far, but I will have a trip into town to see what I can get. Any tips on something other than A&D ointment as its not available here in the UK. I was thinking of bio oil, anyone used that? Or perhaps the anti-chaffing cream that I use for cycling?
A&D ointment is a an anti-bacterial ointment commonly used here for diaper rash and skin healing. I use it for lots of things besides chastity. It works great on cuts and sores and mild burns also. The last thing you want is for your wife to get concerned about sores from chafing from the base ring. That could end things very quickly as almost happened to us. Another thing you could do when out of the cage is to make the edges of the base ring more rounded starting with coarse sandpaper to get the round shape, then polish up with very fine sandpaper. Especially on the bottom part of the ring that rubs against the back of your scrotum. The CB series would be almost perfect if they had a round base ring instead of that flat ring.
I just use E45 cream around the base ring. 2 - 3 times a day is enough and of course the more you wear it the more your body will adjust. As others have allready said be patient. Show her lots of affection but do not pressure her to perform. She will grow into tbe role in her own time but more often than not you will read that when things do start to click they happen fairly quickly and tend to take you by suprise. When my wife first said as a joke I may never let you out again I nearly messed myself lol.
Thanks all, I got some silicone lube and all is well. I might try some E45 as I have some slight chaffing developing. We had a brief chat about it yesterday and she apologized for being a bit distant, said she was feeling under the weather and it wasn't to do with the chastity. We had a cuddle and kiss and when I went to the pub last night she made a couple of comments about being careful not to get knocked over with a cheeky smile. The Bon4Ms arrived yesterday and I spent some time making sure it was nice and smooth, took the tips from here to ensure all sharpish edges were smoothed off with a dremel. I asked for the keys to switch over so I shaved washed and put it on. Its quite heavy and metal down there feels totally different than the plastic CB6K. I had to switch to a smaller ring size as I felt it was slipping quite a bit, but now it feels nice a snug. Although the cage is the same length as the CB6K it is a little wider which means there is a bit of room when flacid. Erections are still possible, and woke this morning with a raging boner which was a little uncomfortable, more so that with the CB6K possibly because of the smaller ring. Anyway, locked for 3 days now and loving it, my wife hinted yesterday that I might have to wait beyond Saturday for release as we have some friends coming round tonight and she might be a bit too hungover tomorrow to play. With the kids off school next week, it could be another week before we get an opportunity to play - GULP!!
To be honest though I would love to just eat her pussy and stay locked, but she is in control and I mustn't start topping from the bottom. If she wants me to cum I must cum.
Well our Saturday play date has come and gone, we were both pretty hungover off last nights festivities and so she has asked me to wait a little longer for an orgasm. We had a great chat last night and I think she is getting more into this as she was asking how I would like to be teased and had noticed how I had changed over the past few days. Said she was turned on the other night when I went to the pub knowing I was locked up and wished I had come home earlier so we could have had some teasing. After the party last night we had some passionate kissing and then went to bed where I ate her pussy and sucked her tits. Was incredibly turned on by this being locked up. She said she missed my cock inside of her and I said that she was in control and could have it any time she wanted. She like this and with a smile said no I would have to wait as it was nice for me not just to shoving it in as soon as she was wet. So day 5 and it looks like I will be locked all next week, the next time when we have the house to ourselves will be when the kids go back to school a week on Monday. That is unless she wants me inside of her one night when we go to bed. I might put a lock on the bedroom door as its one thing the kids walking on vanilla sex, but with me tied to bed and her teasing me in a cage that would not be good. BTW I have had to switch back to the CB6K as the Bon4m was causing a bit of chaffing due to the extra weight. Using sudocrem and E45 and its clearing up nicely. Hopefully it wont get any worse and I will have to get unlocked prematurely.
Congratulations, sounds like things are going well for you. And don't forget there's no reason she can't have your cock and deny you too; there are plenty of ways for her to have fun and you not to.
I suspect that your lady has already accepted and recognized the power she now has . Perhaps you need to look at the message that her actions are non-verbally communicating?
I think you are right, I gave her another orgasm with my tongue last night and it felt amazing although I have had a boner most of the night. The taste of her sweet pussy drove me wild and I think that turned her on all the more. Hopefully she will suggest some teasing out of the cage soon, although I don't want to let myself down by cumming without permission. Feeling very frustrated all the time and excited and apprehensive at another week being locked up. She said she bets I want to keep this thing on forever. Be careful what you wish for!